Have you ever wished you could go back to the past? I have. I wish it all the time. I think of happiness and joy. The past was simple and horrid at the same time. I never really could put my finger on it. I figure we need to lose something sad in our past to gain something good we have now.
Sometimes, I wish I could go back to that time Frank and I prayed for just one more snow day. He wanted just one more day with dad. I wanted just one more day with him, Allan, and Ruth. I didn’t know how important they were to me. One time Ruth gave me a makeover! Allan and I used to play “spies” every weekend. It was when I was happy.
Sometimes we are scared of the past. We are scared of what we might find. We are scared to remember the things that developed our worries and faults. I know I invite people in, and then I push those same people right on back out. I don’t want to remember what makes me do that. I’m scared of the good memories from the past. I am scared of what those memories will make me realize.
I don’t know why I am always walking in the past. Sometimes it’s where I wish I was right now, and sometimes it’s because the past comes back and says, “Don’t do ______ because you don’t want ______ to happen again.” The truth is, people never can escape their pasts. Those pasts will always be there.
I have learned it’s easier to go back. Then I can figure out why I am the way I am and why people mean so much to me so quickly. I have learned it’s better to look back sometimes. We can learn something new about ourselves. I think everyone should try to take at least one walk through the past.