Teens and their Parents

May 29, 2008
By Christina Dennis, San Jose, CA

As a fellow teenager I do sometimes argue with my parents. But is it my fault or is it theirs? Well it depends on what we say to each other and who starts it. I understand that at times I can get easily agitated by my parents but I also understand that it’s difficult raising a child. Having the ability to raise a child of your own is a huge job, but an even bigger job is getting along with your teenage child.

Watching your child grow up and being there for them is allot of responsibility but as a parent it’s also their job to make sure they have a good relationship with their teenagers. Teen struggle through life every day and they need that parental guidance to help the find their way. Talking to a teenager can be a challenge, we sometimes get an attitude, but we don’t’ mean it, sometimes it’s all based on how you (a parent) approaches us. Creating a good relationship with an older child is as easy as the parent makes it. Talk to the child as much as possible, see what he or she is doing, how their day is going, in order to build a type of friendship, and trust with them.

The stronger a parent and teenager relationship is better the better the child will end up. Although a teenager might not want to admit it, they do honestly look up to their parents a lot. They ask for advice, help on homework, or just simply how their parent’s day was. Teens do this because they do care, but if they don’t get along with their parents as good as they should then they won’t talk to their parents unless they are addressed first. By establishing simple rules for the teenager, while making it clear to them why they should follow them, will help the child create morals and rules for them selves. For example when a parent just tells their teenager that they have a curfew of midnight the child may not listen and come home later, but by sitting the teen down and explaining the dangers of being out late at night are, the teen, most likely, will listen.

Parents have to keep an authority over their teenagers but not by yelling. Yelling just causes the child to drown out what the adult is saying, if the parent can keep a calm tone and just tell the teen what to do or what not to do, the teenager can respond in a calm matter. This helps the parent and teen child have a good understanding of each other and create a good parent/ child relationship.

Automatically, as a parent, it’s important to love your teenage child and respect there dreams, but parents often forget to build that strong “friendship” with their teen. Being able to communicate with the teen and understand them, will lead to a life long relationship between the parent and their teenager child.

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