Negative Perceptions about Teen Moms

December 7, 2007
By
I got pregnant at 14 years old and had my daughter when I was 15. I had no help from my mother and no father to guide me. All I had was stares from people who didn’t know a thing about me but still judged me. People thought I should get an abortion since I was so young but at that age I knew abortions weren’t for me.


Now I am 16 and my daughter is now 1. I still receive negative perceptions from most people I come in contact with. I had one incident when I was in church; this lady kept staring at me so I smiled at her. She turned her nose up and moments later she had the audacity to say why do you have a baby, you are not even holding her the right way. That’s when I realized how rude and cruel most adults are to all teenage mothers.

Most adults don’t understand that I have just as much responsibility as they do. I don’t have a car so I have to find a way for my daughter to get to and from daycare. I also don’t have a job; therefore I have to depend on others to financially support me and my daughter. My family values education and so they decided that finishing high school was more important than working a job. In addition to that I’m not married yet so I have to make sure my daughter sees her father. I know there are so many teen moms that have overcome obstacles and made a good life for themselves and their family.



While searching the web, I found a statistics article about teen moms. It said, “The poorer the young woman is the more likely for they will become a young mother.” This statement made me realize the obstacles I will have to overcome just to be looked at as an individual instead of as a teen mom that is going to be on welfare and a school dropout (http://www.teen-aid.org/State_Resourses/Indiana.htm).


The reason I'm writing this editorial is to plead with people not to judge teen moms just because we have a child. No young woman should have to justify “why” she had her baby. I want people to stop looking at me like I’m scum off the bottom of their shoe and see me as a young mother, not someone that has committed a crime.


Currently I am looking past all of the negative comments made toward me. I’m a junior working on becoming a better person and also trying to bring up my grades. I will soon be ready to go on college tours to make an investment in my future. I plan to have a good life with my daughter and I refuse to let the rest of the world dictate how I will live the rest of life based on “what they’ve heard”.





Join the Discussion

This article has 11 comments. Post your own now!

JRaye This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 6, 2014 at 4:25 pm
People can be so judgmental, and don't even bother getting to know you. You're taking responsibility for your daughter, think rationally about your future and her's. I especially liked how in this,, you didn't tell us the readers what happened, and that's fine - the point is you're a responsible young woman who loves her daughter, sacrifices so much for her. You don't need to prove anything to anyone. I'm honestly glad there are people like you in the world :)
 
BandGeekAndProud This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 4, 2014 at 10:57 pm
You go, girl! Good for you - you're proving yourself to be intelligent, rational, and responsible, even as a young mother. I really respect you finishi school, too. I wish you and your child happiness and luck in the years to come. (:
 
JameBrown said...
Nov. 2, 2012 at 9:50 am
This article litterally made me cry. I am 18, I got pregnant at 14, I had my daughter at 15, and I am now in college. I had no help ! Not from her father nor my family ever. But im making it. Hunny you can do it I promise you. I thank God that he put a man in my life that loves my daughter and cares for her just as well as me. He is my only support system, mind you he hasnt always been here. I have struggled day in and day out. I am so happy to finnally see that im not the only one thats judged ... (more »)
 
JameBrown said...
Nov. 2, 2012 at 9:46 am
This article litterally made me cry. I am 18, I got pregnant at 14, I had my daughter at 15, and I am now in college. I had no help ! Not from her father nor my family ever. But im making it. Hunny you can do it I promise you. I thank God that he put a man in my life that loves my daughter and cares for her just as well as me. He is my only support system, mind you he hasnt always been here. I have struggled day in and day out. I am so happy to finnally see that im not the only one thats judged ... (more »)
 
Meganluvsyu1234 said...
Sept. 3, 2011 at 4:26 pm
Ok, when I was 15 my mom had a set of twins. Me and my sister looked just alike. Different hair color, but thats basiclly it. Well when we go places my mom woud take my brother and go look around and I would take my sister. Wel I would always get strange looks from people because I was with my baby sister. I had so many people stop and ask me "Is that your baby?" Sometimes I just wanted to be like "ya, is there a problem?" It hurts teenage moms and dads when people say negative things like that.... (more »)
 
WinnieRose said...
Mar. 15, 2011 at 11:30 pm
I really love how you expressed how the adults take us teen moms not seriously and like we can't handle it.  Usually their upset because they probably had a hard time getting their child and they find it insulting how ours just happened without warning.  Screw them it's you and your beautiful daughters life. I hope you have the best of luck with school and your future.  She's worth it, isn't she?
 
Royelle_2009 said...
Mar. 15, 2011 at 10:10 pm
I really like that you wrote this.  One of my best friends is a teen mom and her older sister had twins when she was 20. It's really hard for them not having a lot of money to raise 3 babies and my friend going to school and her sister trying to go to college.  I have a feeling of what you are going through.  You are doing great and it seems you are handling your situation very well :) God bless you!
 
Rebecca S. said...
Mar. 15, 2011 at 9:20 pm
This is a great approach to people like you... I don't think people ever really thought about how the teen moms actually thought about those comments and stares. I certainly think this will get people talking. You are an inspiration!
 
Sally D. said...
Aug. 26, 2009 at 12:14 pm
I don't get this. You can't tell people not to believe what they've heard if you're proving them right.
 
Bondie1573 replied...
Mar. 16, 2011 at 5:09 am
People like you are the reason she wrote this. You have no idea what she's gone through and be glad you don't. She's stepped up to the plate and taken responsibility. You don't know anything about her, her child, or her life. Who are you to judge?
 
biangel424 replied...
Mar. 16, 2011 at 4:20 pm
Thank you! I believe any one can be a teen mom but they need to be ready enough for it.
 
bRealTime banner ad on the left side
Site Feedback