If I kissed you...
Author's note: Writing is my passion. If I don't write daily, I feel like my day is incomplete. I wrote this to... Show full author's note »
Turning TablesAs the car rolled up to the motor-home I noticed something red on the car floor. The engine stopped, and he seemed to be in thought for some seconds, so I slowly reached down my hand to it. My fingertips touched a pointed, red heel. He must have missed it and it fell out when he pushed me into the car. I clinged it to my arm, slipping it up my sleeve as my heart started racing the instant I knew what I'd have to do.
He looked back at me with this contemplating look and then turned his head slowly back to the front of the car when he saw the look on my face.
“Just what are you willing to do to keep him from dying?” I could hear the edge in his voice, what he was offering.
Nausea welled inside me and then was replaced by adrenaline.
“Why don't we get inside the trailer so you can find out?” the silence from my last word consumed the car for five horrible seconds and then he finally grinned this sick grin as though he'd managed to crack me. He still hadn't touched the keys which were stuck in the ignition.
His grin grew wider, “Sounds good to me,”
I knew exactly how I was going to strike him with it-low so he wouldn't have as much time to react before it was too late. He opened the door as I opened the back door on the same side of the car, I shut mine as he did, turning to face me with this exhilarated smile with his own sick version of this truly joyous look on his face. Then I froze. Something in that smile reminded me of myself.
A flash of a memory of when I caught a reflection of myself smiling in a mirror at a bar, drinking with friends, toasting to my mother's engagement as the glasses clanged together-that same exact smile.
Then I saw myself-for real-in real life I saw my body standing behind him with the same exact grin and wearing the same clothes I'd worn that day. She looked as though whatever was inside her was darker-like her soul had been charred and blackened just as his had.
“So are you going to kill your brother now, Kim?” her voice echoed in my ears.
I stumbled back from him in shock, my eyes wild, and his grin left his face like a candle being blown out in the shadows of his eyes.
Then she just vanished, leaving only the desert behind her, but her voice whispered once more to me; “It could be fun.”
My face had gone white, all color drained from my body like life, and I was suddenly straining myself just to stand up, whatever energy once in me was completely depleted from this shock.
The shocking red heel thudded to the cracked sand of the desert floor and it was like I sent up a flare to alert him of my intentions. But I didn't care, I pointed to where she had been, and he whipped around; he too looked as though I'd scared him out of his wits.
“There's nothing!” he yelled, frustration in his voice. He looked back at me down to the red, pointed evidence of my intentions and a grimace took over his face as he scanned me over knowing what I had been about to do.
I shook my head, my lips were numb. “Didn't you hear it?” I asked him, whisper-soft.
“Here what?” he snapped, snatching up the heel and throwing it at the old shed-amazingly it stuck in the wood planks, jutting out like a stop sign.
“You didn't hear her?” I asked him, agonized-I was finally snapping-my own mind was betraying me and there was nothing I could do about it.
“Her?! There's no one!” he thundered mercilessly.
I shook my head though I could see the truth in what he said right before me, “But you had to-she was right there!” I screamed out, unwilling to believe as his eyes took mine in.
He could see I truly believed I saw someone. Raiden cocked his head at me, as though seeing a weakness-a sickness I had. I didn't like the way he was looking at me-it made my stomach churn, as though I were an animal he might have to put out of it's misery.
I shook my head at him, “Don't-don't look at me like that...” I stuttered.
Suddenly he pounced, dragging me to the motor-home: all I could recall was screaming as I tried pulling away from him so hard I almost jerked my arms out of their sockets, and then blackness clouded my vision as he jerked me into the motor-home so hard it jarred the life out of me.
My arm was up. Dangling above my head, I shook it and heard the clanging of metal. Opening my eyes I saw that I was on the trailer bed, I brought myself up and looked at my handcuffed wrist.
“Damn it,” I murmured, swiping a strand of hair from my face.
It was handcuffed to the top of the fancy, wrought-iron bed board. Then the memories of the previous day washed over me. I remembered seeing myself behind Raiden-he said he was going to kill John, and the billowing smoke of the police cars, those kids...where were they now?
I sat up and winced at the shooting pain my rib produced.
Raiden was nowhere to be seen and I heard no movement in the trailer. I went through the drawers I could reach and all of them had been emptied. “Damn.”
I sat back in silence and waited for him. After thirty minutes or so the silence was broken by something that sounded like whimpering coming from the outside of the kitchen window.
“John?!” I yelled, hurting my own ears.
A muffled, “Kim?!” responded back. I cried out in relief.
“Are you okay?!” I bellowed back, hoping to carry through the walls.
“He's gone!” his muffled voice spoke back.
“I'm stuck!” I screamed at him as loud as I could.
Silence. “So am I!”
“Ugh!” my body went limp in disappointment.
“What are you doing out there?!” I yelled.
What sounded like either laughing or crying reached my ears, “Nothing much.”
Raiden must have tied him up outside now, and was going to make an example of him that way. And make me watch.
“He's coming!” John screamed.
I heard the distant rumble of his car. “No, please don't kill him-please...” I started whimpering as it parked outside the trailer. Hearing the loud thuds of his footsteps the door was opened to the room as soon as I'd heard him.
“I have good news.”
The cellphone he had told me about was in his hand, and he shook it at me as though he had proof, flipping it open, he handed it to me.
Slowly I took it as he looked at me with a renewed face.
There was a text message reading: 'Results confirm no possible relation.'
So he wasn't my brother like that other warped version of me had said. I breathed in hard, knowing now that there was no relation between us things would change. But then again, in the car before he'd seemed willing enough anyways, so I really couldn't say how this would affect someone like him.
He took it away from my shocked face. I heard it snap shut as he put it back into his pocket.
“Why don't you make us some dinner?” he more demanded than suggested, as he pulled out a ring of keys from his back pockets and reached his arms over me to unlock my cuffs.
Raiden hovered over the bed longer than he should have, and once my wrist was loose I shot back off the bed and pressed myself into the closet drawers.
He looked at me as though I should be thanking him instead of acting this way. “...I have a surprise for you.” he went to leave the room and waved me over, “Come.”
Walking through the room and the tiny bathroom hall, when in the kitchenette I saw what was right outside the window and screamed.
John had been stuck up on posts, wrapped there only by barbed wire, streaks of blood trickled down his shirtless body.
I fell to the floor of the kitchen sobbing, in a complete wreck.
Raiden crouched down to face me, “And you know...he will stay that way until he dies-of thirst-starvation-I don't give a rat's ass what. But he will die and you will watch him. Just as I promised.” he shook his head at my sobbing. “No-no-no, don't do that, if I see he's making you cry that just get's me angry you see-and that would mean I would go out there right now and shoot him.”
I started gasping instead of crying, intent on steadying myself for John's sake. I looked at Raiden, the question of 'How could you?' in my eyes, and he returned the look with something like mock concern. He really wanted me to believe that if he killed John it would be for my own good.
“You twisted f*ck!” I wanted to scream at him. My breathing was regulated more as this anger steadied me.
“Now...why don't you make us some dinner.” he got up, looking down at me as though if I made one wrong move he would be all over John.
I made myself get up, and looked at John through the window. I tried to smile at him as Raiden sat at the little table waiting. There was such heartbreak in John's eyes, and I'm sure mine mirrored his, but I couldn't bring myself to look away.
“How's that dinner goin', baby?” Raiden asked me mockingly, leaning back into the chair and opening the blinds fully so John could see what was happening.
“Uh-” I wiped off my face and looked through the cupboards automatically. I cooked some frozen stir fry meal they had, mechanically. However tempting, I never dared to look at John throughout, knowing I would be enveloped by tears.
I set down two platefuls and left some in the skillet in a lost hope of it somehow reaching John. If I were able to get to him-one thing for certain is that we would leave, this time I would not mess it up. I stole a glance through the blinds at John, his head turned our way, watching us in a grimace of pain. This time I couldn't afford to wait for a better chance-whatever chance I got I would have to take it and protect John with my life come what may, because one thing I knew for certain-I was a valuable toy to Raiden, and he wasn't in any hurry to brake me yet, compared to John.
“You haven't eaten anything.” he stated, flustered.
“Oh.” I started eating despite my nausea to satiate him.
My eyes glanced again to John and then to the flash of the silver ring Raiden was still wearing.
When I was done an awkwardness enveloped around us.
Raiden looked at me, things stirring his mind that I'd rather not see, in his eyes.
“Time for bed.” he said, upbeat as he grabbed my wrist and pulled me into the bedroom. One last terrified look at John showed me he was struggling against the wire, trying to get loose.
He shoved me onto the bed and I rolled off it onto the other side of the room quickly.
“Hah!” he exclaimed in surprise. “Fast when you want to be aren't you?” he murmured.
He held out his hand from across the bed, “Give me your left hand.” All play was gone from his now serious demeanor.
I didn't move.
“Ah-Let me rephrase that; give me your hand or I will go outside and shoot him right now.” he boomed.
I limply held out my left hand, and he took it, cuffing it back to the bed board.
As he took off his shirt and examined the stitched up wound on his shoulder he started speaking.
“I've tried-” he moaned as he flexed his back muscles testing the dexterity of his shoulder. “-to show you how weak he is.” he turned his head my way though still with his back to me. “How you shouldn't shame yourself on someone like him...” he walked over to one of the drawers opposite the bed and opened it. Dangling from his hand was a sparkling diamond necklace.
“I could give you lots of things you know.” his voice was rough and overcompensating, he was treading on waters he never had before. He was scared in his own controlled way of whatever reaction I would have.
Raiden finally turned to me and faced me, dropping the expensive necklace back into the drawer as if it were a trinket, just something he could use to get to me, nothing more of value to him.
“Do you like our new home?” he asked me simply.
Unsure whether he wanted me to answer I stayed quiet for a few seconds testing the waters when he began again.
“If not, I can get you a better one. It's only a matter of time until a different one shows up.”
I shook my head thinking of the casualties.
“This one's fine-it's nice.” I assured.
“Do you want jewelry? Shiny things? I haven't been collecting those, but I can start.” he suggested as though he were trying to bargain for my love.
I thought of him taking necklaces and earrings off of dead women and had to look away from him.
“What do you want? Just name it.” he said.
I considered. “Just let go of John-let him live and we can go elsewhere, I'll-” I couldn't say the words out loud, and besides what would they be exactly? I'll be your wife-I'll be your servant-I'll be your sex-slave? Which would it be?
“-And I'll be there for you.” I finished simply.
“I can't do that.” he stated.
“Why?” I ground out.
“As long as he's alive he'll get in our way.”
“Our way of what?”
“I have never let anyone go.” he said menacingly. “And I'm not about to start with that piece of sh*t-that nothing!”
I had to save John, he wouldn't stop until he was dead and it was obvious he had some sort of vendetta against him because of me.
“If you have some sort of vendetta against him because you think I love him, you can go ahead and let that go because as soon as he's safe I'm yours, alright?!” I tried dealing.
“You can say what you want.” he shook his head as if he wouldn't fall for my crap. “But I know what you'll feel. You have to see that I'm stronger than him-I could've protected you from someone else like me-they would've been dead! Him?!” he shook his head as though trying to get me to see his twisted reasoning. “He can't protect you!” he exclaimed.
“Is that what you think you're doing?” I nodded to myself, disgust apparent on my face, already knowing the true answer. This was all a part of some weird manipulation game he was playing, either that or he was seriously twisted-even more so than I thought before.
He grinned-though it wasn't a real grin, more like a grimace in disguise-I could see in his eyes it was like he knew this would be the outcome of his attempt at courting me.
He switched out the lights.
Black enveloped where he once was and I waited for three seconds in shock in the darkness, my heart pounding out of my chest, listening for his movement. Frantically I began wedging my hand together tightly as I tried jamming it out of the cuff. I managed to get it half-way out then it stuck-
Hands gripped my waist and violently jolted me to the bed, unintentionally ripping my stuck hand loose from the cuff painfully as I yelped.
“I've been waiting so long for this-” he breathed into my ear as he pinned himself over me and started tearing at my clothes.
As Raiden started kissing my neck, I grabbed the alarm clock next to the bed and with all my might slammed it into where I estimated his head to be. With a giant thud his body jerked and he went limp on top of me.
“Argh!” I screamed, pushing him off me with my legs and arms.
Rushing to the light switch I turned it on and revealed his half-naked body on the floor, blood trickled down from a gash on his head. Grabbing his coat I looked through it for the cuff keys and found them. In a blurred panic I unlocked the cuff and grabbed his hand up, cuffing it to the bed board instead of mine.
“Let's see how you like it.” I spat at him