Shades of Black
Author's note: I like to try to expand my writing by making myself try and write about different lifestyles. I... Show full author's note »
OpaqueThey hadn’t told her they had planned to replace him. But, of course, she should have known. Football season had been right around the corner when had died, and they would need a new quarterback. Sometimes she hated him for dying and for leaving her so absolutely alone.
She hated being alone.
The school was buzzing with excitement after the news leaked out that Jake was trying out for quarterback. And, of course, the cheerleaders were none to enthusiastic about showing him their routines and offering to show him around. Everyone wanted to touch him. He was like a brand new toy: A brand new, achingly gorgeous toy. She didn’t need him though. All she wanted to do was mourn by drowning out her sorrow with beer: Lots and lots of beer.
When Jake had been alive, everything had been different. He had helped her coast through the days by steadying her whenever she fell. He had helped her forget how miserable her life was by understanding where she was coming from. He was the only one who had ever understood her. Even before her parents had split, life had been miserable, but at least it had been bearable. Her mother had only done pot on the weekends, and her father would only cheat once a year. The only thing solid about her childhood had been Tommy. When her parents were fighting, she would sneak out from the trailer and into Tommy’s. Together, they would invent stories until they fell asleep.
She hadn’t been able to sleep since he died.
She thought that perhaps she could remedy the situation by moving in with her father. But her father wouldn’t answer the phone, and the more she thought about it, the more she knew she couldn’t leave her mother alone in the world. And so, now she was the sole provider for the family.
The trailer was always dirty. No matter how many times she cleaned it, her mother would always find new ways to wreck it. At first, Aria had thought that allowing her mother to throw the china plates against the wall was just her mother’s way of coping with the divorce.
Her mother hadn’t stopped throwing things for the past 6 months, and they couldn’t afford a therapist on Aria’s wages or even the monthly government regulated stipend and food stamps. So, the throwing continued, along with the alcoholic binges and stream of strange men that wanted nothing better than to spend a day with her mother.
When she was younger, her father had told her that she looked exactly like her mother. And, for the most part she did. She had the pouty lips, round, smooth face and dark hair, but that was as far as the resemblances went. While her mother was sloppy, Aria was organized; while her mother was addicted to drugs, Aria was more into beer and wine, and while her mother would fervently swear to heaven and back that she wanted nothing more than the best for her child, Aria was all too familiar with the punches and screamed curses when there was not enough money to keep her mother high.
The rest of the day passed in a blur of classes. Lana had ignored her for the rest of the day, and as far as Aria was concerned, that was just fine. She could always make amends later, and that was only if she even wanted to. Lana was one of those girls who were so desperate to have friends that she would always forgive Aria: Always