The House On Nightingale | Teen Ink

The House On Nightingale

December 18, 2018
By Mika1211, Stockton, California
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Mika1211, Stockton, California
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     My name is Mirka. My name is originally Czechoslovakian. It means calm, tranquil, serene.It means bitter in Yiddish. It means calm, like the waves of the ocean. Kong play sound of the birds chirping in the morning. I’ve always loved yet hated my name all at the same time. There’s days where I wish I could change my name, but there’s also times when I am okay with it.

    My name was given to me by the father I never met. He had originally heard this name from a Cuban American journalist who had been working in a Mexican program TV reporter, her name was Mirka De Llanos.

    I never understood why my mother. My father who I last saw when I was three years old, then one day I don’t remember when or why he was gone. I have never really asked about about him, at least I don’t remember. I think I just blocked that part of me out. It never really mattered to me because I have always had my mom and  that’s all I’ve ever known, I don’t need more than just her. At school people don’t know how to pronounce my name. No one knows how to roll the “r”. I never say anything because I’m too afraid, I don’t really mind though. My mom sometimes calls me Mika or Mikaela . I’ve heard groups of people make fun of my name but that’s okay

    We didn’t always live on Nightingale Avenue. Before that we lived in Redwood City and before that we live then in Mexico. I don’t remember a lot from back then but when I don’t remember it was has always made me sad and happy all at the same time.

    When I was 3 to 5 we lived in Mexico and my grandpa's ranch. I remember always being with my older sister(She was 11 months older than me) and my cousin (they were 19 days apart), we would always play with toys in the flowers or leaves from the trees. Then when I was five about to transform we move to the United States into a little Sadie I’m in a park called Redwood City. We met a lot of new family that we didn’t even know we had. We started school there and learned speak English.

     When I turned nine and I was going into fourth grade who moved here to Stockton. Living here hasn’t really changed anything. We live in a three-bedroom homes, one bathroom, living room and a small kitchen. My mom‘s husband made another room in the garage for my brother. After a few years of living here and he made another room in the backyard where my stepbrothers got to live.. after my stepbrother’s got a high school do you live with us then they decided to my house together and they moved out my brother Sam said I could keep the room so it was passed down to me. Everything my mother has done for us  I do wish that one day I can buy a better house than the one in Nightingale.

   I was sitting in the living room, I was on my phone listening to music. I have always hated being around people so when I did decide to get out of my room, you would always see me fitting in a corner headphones in, with a book on my hand.

    That day I started to say that my sister and my mom was screaming. I didn’t know why but I always hated hearing people argue. I turn the volume up and tried to ignore it. My mom has never, ever, hit me or my siblings. I don’t member one time where she hit me or any of my siblings, she never really gets angry at all. I guess that’s the reason I hate it when people are you because I’m not used to the environment.

    I never knew why my sister got in trouble, I never really asked, not because I didn’t care or anything like that. I’ve always just kept to myself. I did cry though, I guess I’ve always been sensitive, whenever I see my sister crying, I always cry too. Maybe it’s because I’ve always been really closet her, she’s only 11 months older than me. She’s like my twin and we’ve always done everything together.

    One day I was at school and I kept hearing a noise, I didn’t know what it was but it was bothering me. I don’t know why but it was really messing with me, I asked my friend if she could hear it to. She said yes that it was the sound of the air conditioning. It continued to bother me until, I started to feel my hand get stiff and numb. Slowly I started to feel pins and needles all over the left side of my body, I couldn’t breathe and I wanted to get out of that classroom. I got up but my legs felt weak. My friend just stared at me, she new that I had this but she had never had to experience it so she called my other friend and they took me outside the classroom and into the hallway. I dropped to the floor and just cried. I hated crying in front of people and I just wanted to disappear. I slowly calmed down, we where out there for so long about  twenty to thirty min but it felt like hours. I hated that they had to see me like that, freaking out over the sound of the air conditioning.

    When I first came here to the United States I have no idea how to speak English. I only know how to speak Spanish, it was the only way I could communicate with other people. When I got here I was put in first grade and I was in ELD. I think it was harder for me to get out of ELD because school I was taught both in English and Spanish. One day we would do most of the lessons in English and the next day would be in Spanish unless you had ELD, every day we had to go to another classroom for about 30 minutes just to learn English.

    Then when we move to Stockton my whole school was only in English, most teachers didn’t speak Spanish and I was too afraid to make friends because I thought they would make fun of my accent. For the first few months I made no friends, I just kept to myself. Later on I made one friend that was also a ELD.

    I was in a ELD all the way through sixth grade. At the middle of six grade my ELD teacher told me that it would be my last day in there. I was so happy because it meant that I didn’t need to have any more extra classes.

    My grandpa has always been a hard-working person. I remember that he would always be growing his crops or he’d be cutting wood or taking care of his horses, cows,or any other of his animals. I remember when we left Mexico and he and my grandma were really sad. We were the last of his of their grandchildren that live with them. All my other aunts and uncles her left years ago and moved to the United States and now we are leaving them too.

    We didn’t see my grandparents for about 5 to 7 years, until they were able to get a visa. they seemed so happy. Her children do you have anything in over 10 years and lay sauce again and met through the other grandchildren they had never met.

    To be in the hospital. When he was younger especially. The weather supposed to and he needs surgery. I can tell grandpa doesn’t want to be here. He doesn’t want surgery because he feels bad that my mom and her siblings have to pay for everything and he scared of dying. He says he wants to die in the place in the same place he was born. I’ve never visited him in the hospital I’m too afraid to go into a hospital. I guess if I see him with all those wires on him, because I don’t want anything bad to happen to him.

 My birthday is on December 11, 2000. Most of my birthdays have always been normal days to me. I never do anything for it I never get anything, most years my birthday lands on school days so I stay home. I don’t know why but I’ve always hated getting any sort of attention, it doesn’t matter if it’s big or small, I just don’t like it.

    There was one year when I went to my friends house for the first time and she and her sister made me a cake. It was really nice thing to do but it made me a bit uncomfortable. How her whole family was staring at me and singing happy birthday while I was just sitting there being stared at, which I hate it so much.

    It was the first time that I had celebrated my birthday, it was really nice, it was something I would normally not do but I’m glad I had that experience. Even if it was something that I would have never done I think that was the most special things salon did for me.

 My mom was cleaning houses, she works every day except Sundays. I’m not able to get a job, with my mom when I get the chance. The first time I want to work with my mom I was nine or ten years old,the first few years I went to work with her, I wasn’t able to do a lot of things, I would only dust and broom. These houses were mostly two-story houses which made it a lot of work when I was but I do Julie understand what words meant. I would mostly just sold her so that she could use the carport and get home faster because she works in the baby out which is about an hour and thirty minutes away with no traffic.

    No when I go to work with my mom I know how to do mostly everything in most of the houses. I can now change the beds clean the bathrooms clean the stove and the rest of the kitchen I can mom. I don’t get to help her out a lot because I have school but every time we have brakes, I go with her to help her out. Sometime she gives me twenty dollars, depending on how many houses we clean but I know she doesn’t make a lot of money so I try not to take it from her

   Last Christmas was the first Christmas without my older sister, we’ve never really celebrated any holiday Christmas is the only one we kind of celebrated, we do the food and the presence. You never. Me and my sisters always like to my matching pajamas not Christmas my sister with something, she had to leave back to Mexico we didn’t know when she was coming back, we still don’t know when she’ll be back. It’s been about a year since she’s been gone. I hate not having her here, it doesn’t feel like it’s the right thing. Ever since I can remember everywhere we went we all had at least one or the other with us, we were never alone.

     I can’t imagine how she feels being all on her own. I hope she gets to come back soon, I always tell everyone that I don’t miss her but I do, I miss her a lot. Something about not having her with us makes me really, really sad. Doing things without her feels wrong to do. I just wish that she could come back to us, here before this next Christmas, but it doesn’t seem like it will happen anytime soon.

   The one thing I’ve always heard from everyone in my family has always been that I have to go to school. I’ve never really liked going to school, yes I have good grade. I don’t get the best grades but I also don’t always get the worst grades. I could probably try harder but i don’t know why I don’t. I know that I have to go to school if I want to do anything in life. I’ve missed a lot of school the last couple of years because I’m sock. There were times when I just wished I could drop out and just go to work with my mom or my aunties because I see how hard they work to provide food on the table for their children.

     Everyone in my family always tells me that I have to at least finish high school so that I won’t have to end up cleaning houses or being a gardener like my aunts and uncles. I’ve always known that I have to go to school, when I say I want to drop out, I’m only joking, but everyone always takes it so serious. I always end up being lectured by people that never talk to me. I know their advice comes from a good place and I know they’re right.



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