An Adventure of PatsyLou Scottsdale | Teen Ink

An Adventure of PatsyLou Scottsdale

December 27, 2013
By BrinaJo2018 GOLD, Memphis, Tennessee
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BrinaJo2018 GOLD, Memphis, Tennessee
13 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure. -Rowena Ravenclaw


The author's comments:
Patsy's beginning

“The first time I time traveled I was 129. I’ve traveled a lot since then, seeing how I am 693. I stepped into the P.O.TA.T.O, Places Over Time And The Outside, which was lime green with gold spirals, which does not look like a potato, but a telephone booth with silver doors (those never change no matter how many times the spiral colors do). I was excited. It was a pleasantly sunny day on Materap (my home planet) and I had just earned my C.O.T.-Certificate of Time. I was officially ready to be called “The Girl” (the name given to me by the Materap Council), and journey on.
I placed my framed cream-colored certificate in the interior of the P.O.T.A.T.O., which had that new…caramel smell. I looked at and touched everything to familiarize myself with the instruments before I left. As I adjusted the controls and regulated the system, I thought about how right everything felt in my hands, and how everything was so fresh, so clean and so…shiny. It was all mine, the library, the built-in coffee shop, the patio simulator for when I wanted to pretend that I was somewhere exotic. Everything was mine to touch, mine to experience, and mine to explore. I set my course for Flarat, the planet with the most beautiful flowers anywhere (my Mother loved flowers and I wanted something to honor her by in my P.O.T.A.T.O); I felt that familiar shaking that I had experienced so many times before in the Traveling Simulator during my training. I held on tightly to the polished brass railing of the P.O.T.A.T.O, and I traveled through the Outside, and I’ve been traveling ever since.”


PatsyLou Scottsdale is a time traveler. She travels to different dimensions in the Outside with her pet poodle, Snicksy. Patsy Lou, or “The Girl” (her title) has sparkly red hair, bright blue eyes, and grey skin. She always takes photos on her trips and one hot and rainy day on planet Nosh in the Seech dimension, she was looking at her photo album from her trip to Garshlen. As she flipped through the photos, one in particular stood out to her. The photo depicted her running from a Jinderschlap; an alien with its mind centered around two things and two things only, war and destruction.

The author's comments:
Garshlen

**Flashback**


Patsy ran through tight spaces and closed off areas in the heart of Garshlen, G5. She would pretend that her skin didn’t stand out against the orange of the newly discovered planet, and that her white dress, green leggings and combat boots didn’t contrast with the pink and yellow sundresses and boots that the other ladies were wearing. Patsy chose to be different and even though it made her self-conscious sometimes, it was what she liked.
As Patsy ran, she thought about how long it had been since she had eaten last. It had been about two Earth weeks or ten Gashlen days, so she slowed her running to an easy paced jog and stopped at the nearest coffee shop (Patsy being from the Clynt sector of Materap, only ate at coffee shops because it was custom). Upon entering she noticed two Jinderschlaps loitering quietly near the side of the glass building, but paid them no attention because the moment she turned around, she forgot about them. She walked up to the white, floating counter and placed an order for a blue leaf scone and a medium sweet coffee. While she was receiving her change of 43 Gashles, the equivalent of 20 cents from the young man behind the counter, sporting a yellow afro and a blue hoodie over his one-size-to-big and rumpled “Gash Brew” uniform tee, Patsy noticed a change in the man’s eye color, hazel to pitch-black. She asked about his change in appearance, and he responded with a simple, “Oh that? Well, it was just time”, and he turned lazily on his heels and walked back into the employee break room just as Patsy’s order was completed. “The Girl” walked out of the “Gash Brew”, food and drink in hand, and strolled calmly past the Jinderschlaps, who were hidden in the shadows.
As she walked past, she felt a sudden chill wash over her and it made her stop in her tracks. She stood there and slowly turned around. Nothing was there on that cracked sidewalk, but she turned back around with that strange feeling that someone was watching her as she hurriedly fast-walked back to the P.O.T.A.T.O. As she was taking out her keys, Snicksy came hurdling out, yapping away like a madwoman. “Snicks!” cried The Girl. “You know I can’t understand you while you’re in dog form. Hurry up and switch.”


You see, Snicksy is a shape-shifter that prefers the cute, little poodle form to any other animal. It was quite irritating for The Girl, because she couldn’t understand a word that Snicksy was saying, even though the P.O.T.A.T.O could translate anything.
Snicksy changed into human form, wearing a faded, white rock band t-shirt, dark-wash skinny jeans, black high-top Converse. And to tie it all together, hot pink streaks in her otherwise bleached blonde hair that perfectly matched the blue freckles that were sprinkled across the nose of her maple colored skin. “So, what were you yapping about before?” asked The Girl with a roll of her dazzling blue eyes. “Well Pats, I was saying that while you were out, I noticed that you can go on like…tours and stuff…”
“Seriously Snicks, you just want to get out of here and meet some people and go places, and you are 576. You do NOT use words such as ‘like’ and ‘stuff’!! What are you, 321?” Snicks stomped off, picked up an envelope, grabbed The Girl’s hand, and ran to the Interway, the Gashlen transportation system. The two friends hopped into the car and sped off into rural Gashlen.
As the two sat on the shiny, red, leather booth seats, three people, triplets actually, came and sat down across from them, one boy and two girls. They introduced themselves as Jimmy, Elizabeth, and Michele, and were called the Green Triplets, because they each had a P.O.T.A.T.O green body part. Jimmy had green hair, Elizabeth had green skin, and Michele had green eyes. The five passengers struck up a conversation, “So, you’re all triplets?” asked Snicksy.
“Yea. We’re all green, so we’re triplets,” responded the siblings at once.
“Where are you all from?” The Girl asked
“Coldonia”, Jimmy answered proudly, “Each family has a different color.”
“That’s so cool,” Snicksy squealed. “I can shape-shift and Pats here is a Time Traveler. The formal term is Time Bender, but Time Traveler is the intergalactic term.” This caused The Girl to blush, but the Triplets were really impressed.
“Wow!” exclaimed Michele, “You two are amazing!” Conversation continued. The five talked about anything and everything: interesting facts about themselves, how Micha Calao was getting out of control and anything else of interest.
Pretty soon the five new friends had arrived. They all stepped gingerly off of the Interway and looked at the unfamiliar surroundings. It was flat. There was nothing there. The ground was hard like a frozen biscuit, and it was as hot as standing at the center of a bonfire in the middle of July would be. The five new friends were not impressed with what they saw. Jimmy came to the conclusion that they had wasted their money, while The Girl thought there was something oddly familiar about their new environment, like something wasn’t supposed to be there, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it.

At that moment, the ground began to shake and the foulest smell began to waft through the air, and with it, came a haze of blue smoke. The smoke was thick and heavy, but seemed thin when it started to roll in. A noise sounded through the mist, and a shape appeared. Michele suggested that they walk towards it and ask about the mysterious blue smoke. Once they had ambled towards it, they saw that it was not what they had anticipated. A Jinderschlap stood before them, pale yellow and its one eye gleaming with malicious delight; prepared to strike. Everyone stood still. No one dared to move and no one uttered a single, solitary sound. They were petrified.
The Jinderschlap didn’t move, but looked at them intently as if to say he was waiting for them to do something because he was getting bored. “What is that thing?”
“Snicks, if I knew, I’d tell you, but since I don’t, we need to figure it out before it kills us!!!”
“Well Pats, how about you use that super, coolio lipstick of yours? It does…stuff.” The Girl took her hallusonic lipstick out of her combat boot and pointed it at the Jinderschlap. The lipstick did a scan, and the information showed up on her compact reader. The information read as follows:

Jinderschlap. Found in Rural Gashlen. Pale yellow and has one eye with two pupils. Seeks war and destruction. Favors the blood of the heroic-has a more robust flavor. Weak point=top of the head. Jinderschlaps cannot look up without moving their head.


“So, are we gonna kill it or what?” asked Jimmy with his hand running through his curly green hair.
Elizabeth replied with a sarcastic, “Don’t ask stupid questions Grass Brain. Of course we’re gonna kill it! How else are we gonna, you know, defeat it? Right G?” The Girl thought about that. She normally didn’t try to harm any of the life forms that she encountered while traveling through the Outside too seriously. She responded with a ‘no’, but she was a little too late.
At that moment, the Jinderschlap came running towards them, because he had gotten bored with them and was ready to feast. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t be able to send the signal to his brethren that it was OK to launch “Take Over Plan A-take control of the Outside.”
“He’s coming this way!” someone shouted, and with that, they all ran towards the Interway, which wasn’t back yet. The Girl called the P.O.T.A.T.O to come and park where they were, but since she had just upgraded it, the P.O.T.A.T.O was still working out the kinks. It landed 5 miles away, in a ditch.

**Present Day**
“This picture brings back so many awful memories,” thought The Girl. Snicksy skipped over to her and asked what she was looking at. The Girl showed her the old photo, and Snicksy laughed. She remembered that day really well. It was one of her finest moments.

**Flashback**
*Snicksy’s POV*
They were running from an alien that wanted to eat them. It was just great. The triplets had this look of pure terror about them, and Snicks looked like this was her idea of fun, which it was. Abruptly, The Girl stopped. Her four friends stopped running and turned around too. Snicks saw that all too familiar lighting of her best friend’s eyes, and knew that they had a plan, and the way she was looking her, she was the one to do it. “Snicks!” said The Girl,
“What have you thought up now?” replied Snicksy.
“It’s a plan. It’s a pretty genius plan too. You shape-shift. Correct? Cor-” “Umm…Pats, this is no time for stupid questions, because you know the answer which is yes, and that was rhetorical wasn’t it?” The Girl gave her this look that made Snicks shrink back a bit.
“As I was saying Snicks. You can shape-shift. Can you possibly turn into a Jindershlap? And before you ask another stupid question, we’d know it’s you, because your pink streaks would show up in the pale yellow.”
“OK, fine. I’ll do it.”
“Good. Now I need you to distract the Jinderschlap so I can smear the little hole in the top of his head with lipstick. The thing is like a boomerang you know. It can lock onto a target smear it with lipstick, and come right back to Mama. He’ll be out like a light.”
“Do you want us to do anything G?” asked the Green Triplets.
“Actually yes. Take the keys to the P.O.T.A.T.O and I need you to re-land it here. It should be just beyond this point.” And with that, the triplets went off looking for the P.O.T.A.T.O.


*Triplets POV*
“That Girl is crazy!!!” Jimmy shouted as the three siblings ran, straight ahead, looking for the P.O.T.A.T.O.
“Does she really want us to look for this thing? It’s 5 friggin’ miles away!!! She must be crazy!” With a shake of her head, Elizabeth turned her head and stared at Jimmy and Michele, a look of pure disgust plain on her face.
“Look at you two!! G is trying to save us and you’re complaining because you’re scared and both of you are lazy and don’t want to have to do anything. Now, I’ve lived with you two for 80 years, and I know what you’re like and we trust each other with anything and everything. I don’ t care if I just met her, I trust G with my life. She’s smart, capable, and she seems like she knows what she’s doing when it comes to things like this. If I had to go through this again and I had to pick someone to lead me, I’d pick G every time. So, both of you need to shut up and run!”

The siblings ran onward until they reached the P.O.T.A.T.O a good 20 minutes later. It looked a little worse for wear, smoking and at an angle, like the Leaning Tower of New Pisasa. The three opened the doors with keys given to them by The Girl. “Which key is it??”
“I think it’s that one.” The Girl color coordinated all of her keys, so she could tell which one was which.
“You idiots it’s this one,” Jimmy said sarcastically, holding up a lime green key with gold spirals. “Girls are idiots. You would think you would know which key it was because you love clothes and all that girly crap. Guys are smarter and this proves it.” Elizabeth and Michele shared a look, grabbed the key from their smirking brother, kicking him in the shins to get their anger across.
“Wait!!!” Elizabeth said, “G said that the P.O.T.A.T.O was different and that it was a tad bigger on the inside than it was on the outside. So…we need to be prepared for whatever it is that’s in this thing.”
Jimmy and Michele didn’t listen to a word their sister said. Michele took the key and unlocked the door, pushing her brother and sister into the great piece of machinery.
“Whoa,” They all said in unison, “this is pretty much the coolest thing I’ve ever seen!!!!” Jimmy said enthusiastically. “How does it move?”

At that moment, a list came hurtling out of the control module. “Guys,” Elizabeth said nervously, “it did something.”
“It didn’t do just something,” Jimmy said, “it spat out an instruction manual so we can fly it! Or whatever it is that this thing does.”
“Well, who’s gonna fly it?” Michele asked timidly, she was always shy, but when it was necessary, she could take charge; when she took charge, Michele was a force to be reckoned with.
Her question was answered by a mysterious voice, “I will.”
What was that? The triplets thought simultaneously.
“That was me.”
“Who’s ‘me’?” Elizabeth shouted to no one in particular.
“It’s me, G. And before you get stupid, this is the P.O.T.A.T.O.’s autopilot, ME!!! I’m fully personalized, so I answer questions and say things that I would actually say if I were in physical form. Pretty cool, eh?” Jimmy, Elizabeth and Michele could only nod their heads, as they were too shocked to speak.
“Well, are you three smush brains ready to go back to the real me?”
“Ummm…y-yea sure. We’re ready t-to go,” Michele stammered, still in such a state of shock, that words were a little difficult to form.
With those very unconvincing words, the automated Girl started the P.O.T.A.T.O, and they went off, towards the action.

*Snicksy’s POV*
“You sure this is safe?” I asked Pats, because I certainly didn’t think it was.
“Of course it’s safe! I wouldn’t have you do it if it wasn’t!”
I gave her a look, “Yes you would and you know it. Don’t lie.”
She smirked, “I know, I just wanted to make you feel better about the situation. Did I?”
“What do you think?” I said sarcastically, I had already started the transformation, and because I had never shifted into a Jinderschlap before, it was going to take a minute or two, rather than an instant switch.
“I’ll take that as a yes. Ok, so I need you to move over…good. Stand there for a few seconds while I get ready.”
“Pats!!! I’m not done changing. He’s gonna see me!”
“Ok! I’m done! Ok, so here’s the plan. I’m going to run out there and do whatever it is that I’m going to do, and then when you’re ready, you are going to come out and act like a lady Jinderschlap. You’re just going to make that thing fall in love with you. He’ll be out of it, so…I can jump on his back and sonic the head-hole! Sound like a plan? Good. 1-2-3…Go Team! Whooooo!!!! Let’s get him!” She left me standing there more confused than ever, but when it came to Pats, she knew what she was doing and I trusted her with everything. Why else would I be standing in the middle of an alien desert, shifting into a destructive alien?






~
A few minutes later, I was shifted and ready to go. I stepped forward gingerly, the stupid thing didn’t see me, so I took a few more steps. It was still oblivious. I ran full speed at it and knocked it over. That got its attention. They thing turned its head and looked it at me, softening its muscles. It let out a soft roar and nuzzled its head into my shoulder. It was really creeping me out. I heard Patsy shout, “That was so totally not part of the plan!!” But I didn’t care. I got him distracted and that was the only thing I needed to do. I guess Patsy understood that, because I heard her combat boots pounding the ground as she ran towards us. The all-to-familiar ‘click-click’ of her lipstick met my ears as she smeared my neighbor’s head with lipstick. It let out a roar so mighty that I’m sure everyone must have heard it. As it writhed in agony, I shifted into Snicksy the Poodle and leaped into Patsy’s waiting arms. We ran away from the Jinderschlap whose cries were being echoed by his brethren. We kept going until we fell into cartwheeling telephone booth that whisked us out of Garshlen. The Triplets helped us up as we dusted ourselves off, or Pats dusted me off because I was rather content with staying like poodle for a little while. “So,” Patsy asked, “where do you want to go next? I was thinking of going to Liklerdale. They have lights that never burn out, because the city is supposed to be run by little hamsters in hull of a spaceship decades ahead in the future of the city. It’s really quite complicated, but really quite fun. Oh don’t look at me like that you three! It’ll be fun.”





~
With a flip of a few switches and the pulling of a couple levers, the opera music started (the engines) and they were off, and in the distance you could hear an over-excited Time-Bender shouting, “Resurgam!” Because wherever the Girl and her crew went, trouble was sure to rise.



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