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The Forgotten

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Chapter 6 : Demitier

After what feels like a few days, and judging from the moon cycle, Adrian finally pays me a visit. I had been desperate for this moment, never quite certain whether I was dreading or anticipating it more. He's probably just making sure I haven't planned another escape or maybe he has other reasons, I have no idea. Maybe both.
I don't feel great and could do with a new pair of clothes and a nice, long, shower. I probably smell terrible, but it's not like it's my own fault. I haven't really
(reposted edited chapter)
stumbled upon many showers behind golden drapes and velvet couches. I so annoyed that my fear of my captor has dissipated completely. I can feel my face reddening in anger and place my hands on my hips.
“Are you going to kill me ?” I ask matter a factly. I've grown numb to the idea of death, I don't really care anymore. I just want out of this place, one way or another. It's being stuck in this limbo that is frightening, because my thoughts are the loudest thing in my prison, and they aren't exactly pleasing. That or I am consumed with the need to sleep and sleep some more.
He shakes his head. No. Well, that's one straight answer I've gotten from him. It's a start. Maybe the technique “Let's punch the wall until someone answers me” isn't the most effective.
“Are the cops going to be here soon ?” he chuckles, just a little, but it's enough to piss me off tremendously. Unfortunately, he shakes his head yet again. Well, you can't ask for too much in life. God, what's taking them so long ?
I am exhausted, “Can I take a bath ?”
He offers me the first nod of the day and heads out without even having said a word to me. The young lady, Mouse as I've nicknamed her because she tries to make herself invisible and never utters a word unless spoken to, walks in carrying a towel, some mini soaps and various toiletries and thank you Jesus, a pair of jeans, a cotton shirt, socks, underwear and a bra. I could just kiss her. Actually, on second thought, no I couldn't.

The steaming hot water feels amazing. Each muscle and joint loosens itself. I feel as if I could just melt any instant. After washing my hair twice, and scrubbing myself raw to removed the layers of grim, dirt and oil that caked my skin, I get out and dry off. Before getting dressed, I examine my body in the mirror. Wiping away the condensation with the tips of my fingers, I look over my naked reflection. My brown eyes no longer hold that special twinkle, my hair is in urgent need of a cut and my skin looks sickly, extremely pasty and paler than usual. I can't make out any bruises that would explain the pain I am in. I press my face closer and turn my head this way and that, but my face is also clear of marks. Maybe it's psychological. Disgusted by my own reflection, I pull on the fresh garments. It fells nice to be a little closer to my older self.

As I walk back accompanied by Mouse, I start brainstorming. I haven't tried anything radical yet in order to get away. She is tinny, shorter than me by at least five inches, and can't weigh more than a hundred and ten pounds, max. She is skin and bones, even in my state I could easily take her. But I feel guilty, she is at a disadvantage, her back to me, leading the way. She wouldn't see me coming. It wouldn't be fair. What am I thinking, this isn't about bloody chivalry and politeness. She is working for Adrian, she must know he's a kidnapper. She deserves each and every punch I can land. This is a matter of survival, I convince myself. I elaborate my plan easily as she takes me back, totally oblivious to what is about to happen. Why does she even agree to work for him, ? She young, she should be in education, partying and whatnot. Maybe she owes him a favor or maybe she is in it for the money. Anyone who can rent a mansion such as this one must be filthy rich.
“What's your name ?” I ask, trying to put on my friendliest tone.
She looks startled. She wasn't expecting me to strike conversation. Probably doesn't know what protocol calls for in such situations. Must have missed the chapter on mingling with
hostages in the “Top 100 Worst Jobs” handbook. I nod encouragingly.
“Demitier,” she answers.
What kind of a name is that ? “That's an original name,” I state (good one Captain Obvious), “Tell me, Demitier, where exactly are we ?”
She's worried, he must have forbad her of saying. I sincerely hope she won't get into too much trouble, but my needs are more important than her reserved attitude.
“Miss Leah, I like you, I don't understand why Mr. Ivanov chose you. And I don't think he will hurt you, you're safe with him. But he won't approve of me telling you.”
The girl actually looks genuinely sad. I act out of impulse, because I swear, I have never been the aggressive type. I just need to know. I grab her by the neck and slam her into the wall, with much more force than is necessary. I didn't even know I had it in me. Her feet barely graze the floor. I can see the terror in her eyes.
“Please,” deciding I should stay polite no matter.
“We're in Canada,” She whimpers hastily, slowly turning blue.
What ? No, we can't be. It's impossible. I live in Florida. Not up in no man's land Canada. I almost forget about Mouse, until she lets out a strangled sob. I let Demitier go, and watch as she falls to the ground.
“You won't tell Adrian about our little discussion, OK ?” I warn, looking down at her with my best glare.
She nods frantically. Ashamed by my behavior, I help her stand but she pulls away from me in fear. I take the lead and find my way back into my luxurious prison.
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This book has 24 comments. Post your own!

TaylorWintryThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 2 at 11:39 pm:
The Forgotten Comment Just to tell you in advance, I write my comments while I read so you can get a better feel of my emotions. I apologize sincerely because this will make a REALLY long comment. So here we go. Ch 1 - I love the title of the chapter. First chap. in the book, and BAM it's already the end. Cool effect. I like the repetitiveness in the things she says. "What a rhetorical question, if I'm *here telling you this." Also, you misused "faith." I believe it should be "fate." I really l... (more »)
 
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GhostBeamThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Mar. 17 at 7:10 pm:
Amazing!!!!!!
 
just-another-urlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Mar. 21 at 4:26 pm :
Thanks for reading !
 
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SmileyFace3356 said...
Dec. 3, 2013 at 9:39 pm:
This is amazing, every girl wants a bad boy who's good just for her!  Btw, does anyone know how to bookmark cuz I am definitely bookmarking this!
 
just-another-urlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Mar. 21 at 4:32 pm :
Thanks :) I'm not sure how you can bookmark it, I think you can click a link somewhere requesting to receive an email when I publish new chapters (hope that helps).
 
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IamMeForeverThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Nov. 27, 2013 at 10:52 pm:
More more more!!!
 
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Mermaidmissy said...
Oct. 6, 2011 at 9:35 am:
Ahh I so love this book it is very good and heartwarming all at the same time. I think you should keep writing more pages soon. Hey can you look at my stuff and see what you like I have poems and one book on this web site so check it out if you have a chance k. Thank You!! :) 
 
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EbbaRose said...
Oct. 5, 2011 at 1:08 am:
Good story! And great character voice, i love it!!! can't wait to read more!
 
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Nikiblue said...
Aug. 13, 2011 at 2:49 pm:

I thought the storyline was good and suspenseful. I do have some critics though. I know that a lot of people have already mentioned the spelling errors, and also the weird arrows in the text. Secondly, I feel that a lot of the writing was a little choppy and too quick from one thing to the next. I think more emotion and details should be put in so it feels more as though the reader is there seeing it all for themselves, if that makes any sense?

 

Hopefully I wasn't just rep... (more »)

 
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Drive_it_home_with_one_headlight said...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 6:42 pm:
I like this a lot. The paragraphing is weird, though. It threw me off a little bit, as well as the arrows instead of the ". Is there any significance to the arrows?
 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 8:43 pm :
Sorry about that, I just recently bought an American mac so the sighs changed from the arrows to ". In french we don't have " on the keyboard. Same for the paragraphes. In France books aren't presented the same way. Sorry if it caused any confusion. 
 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 8:44 pm :
* signes.  
 
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AspiringWriter said...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 12:27 pm:

I love the plot; it's very unique. The summary immediately intrigued me. I'd hate to say this again, but you do have a few grammatical errors. It's nothing too big, and it definitely doesn't take away from your story. :)

 

Hmm. What else? I think that you should try adding more descriptions and emotions. Not too much. Just a little. It'll make the story more vivid, if you know what I mean.

 

Great work! :)

 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 2:58 pm :
Thanks !! I will try adding more description and emotions in my next chapters, I have a hard time with that sort of stuff;) Again thank you for reading !
 
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mrs. mom said...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 6:36 pm:
as a mom, i love this story - age appropriate but exciting, fun,sensual,etc.-it's great knowing that there are those who like to write something other than "texts" - i just wonder if this writer's nightmares are as interesting - please continue
 
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renthead96 said...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 5:52 pm:

This is an interesting story. I enjoyed the relationship you created between vampire and zombie--I'm pretty sure I haven't seen that yet. However, there are various spelling/grammar mistakes. You can always have someone else review your chapters to help check for these mistakes: a parent, a sibling, a relative, etc. Just to help with this, I've selected a few common mistakes that you've made to show what you should look for:

"He is aloud to take a break, I'm not angry with Him."more »)

 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 6:51 pm :
Thanks Renthead96. The next few chapters are going to be back and forth between Adrian and Darik's view, so you will get more information about the whole vampire and zombie relationship. As for the mistakes, thank you :) Keep posted for more. :) and thanks again for checking this out. It means alot to me !
 
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tealbird said...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 1:01 pm:
Ok, I'm sorry to say I only had time to read the first chapter of your novel, but I really enjoyed it. I love the tone of the writing, especially the 'big man Upstairs' part :D. Trust me, you had me captivated and I'll be back to read the rest!
 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 6:42 pm :
thanks so much :)
 
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Garnet77 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 12:11 pm:
I really like this story. You do need to revise a few things though. You have a few comma splices--joining two sentences together. Also, I would advise expanding a bit more on the emotional side of your character. Sometimes, she doesn't seem as freaked out as I would have thought. But the story itself is pretty interesting; I can't wait until you post some more. I want to know more about the characters! And I love the whole spin you put on vampires and zombies! Very well done overall! :)
 
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