Facebook Activity



Teen Ink on Twitter

Report abuse Submit my work Share/bookmark Email Print Home

The Forgotten

Rate this article:
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 12 Next »

Chapter 2 : An Unfamiliar Room

“Keep heading straight for 0.5 miles. Turn left on exit 14.”

* * *
"Turn left in 1 minute."

* * *
“Approaching final destination.”

* * *

“Go back to sleep, you're a safe.”

* * *

When I woke, I felt disoriented, scared but mostly in pain. My head – well, I'm not even going to talk about it. My body... an example :get run over by a truck 100 times and ask an elephant to sit on you. Finally,
(Reposting edited chapter)
multiply the pain by a million. Yeah, that's just about how I felt at the moment. But forget that part. The most pressing feeling was that of disorientation. The last thing that I could remember was a falling sensation, into a never ending cold pit, darkness surrounding me, engulfing me. Now I found myself in a small, bare room. No furniture, not even a bed. This was my definition of a cell. A feeling of dread and anxiety gained me but I felt strangely calm as well. As if this wasn't happening to me, but another. I was viewing things from a different perspective than my own. As I surveyed the room, I noticed the only source of light was cast from a lightbulb hanging from the celling, held together by some duck tape. No windows. That narrowed down my non-existent escape plan. My eyes were drawn to an imposing gray trap. Was that the door ? If I was to guess, I'd say it was made of iron, or some kind of invincible material. Great, my chances were looking slimmer and slimmer.
Before I could truly start to panic I stood up, gently in case I lost my balance. However, both my legs seemed to work fine, fortunately. Maybe slightly wobbly but nothing drastic. I slowly made my way to the door and tried finding any sort of knob. Nothing. It must lock from the outside then. Not a very big surprise, in all honesty. I sank back down to the floor which was carpeted. Where was I ? In a room, that I was certain of, maybe in a safe house ? Why was I even here to begin with, when I should be with my friends at the mall. What time was it, had anyone noticed I had disappeared ? But the real question didn't concern my location or why, I could work that out later, the problem was who had done this ? What did they want from me, of all people ? Then it hit me. Adrian ! His cold hands wrapped tightly around my throat, cutting off my air. I'd been kidnapped. Me, Leah Mortel, a nobody, just another face in the crowd.
Now I found myself in the hands of a crazy man, who might even be a serial killer, or a rapist. Someone who had some serious problems. He could be part of a human trafficking cartel for all I knew. What was he going to do to me ? And god ! His eyes... White ! I was hyperventilating. Take deep breaths, Leah. Freaking out won't help solve anything. I tried to soothe myself. I needed to find a reasonable explanation. Maybe he had contacts ? He was nuts after all, so it wouldn't be the least he was capable of. If I got away nobody would believe me. In case I actually made it out, there was a slim chance that I would be able of describing him to the police. His face was to normal to identify, he had no striking features, like a scar. He was handsome, yes, very much so but also ordinary. His name probably wasn't even Adrian. Who would give away their name ? Unless they didn't expect you to make it out alive.
I sat up, shaking off that horrible thought and pushed myself into a position that didn't hurt as much. For the first time since I'd woken, I felt the overwhelming urge to cry. Once the first tear slid down my cheek, I couldn't stop the rest from following. I cried for hours, calling out the names of my parents and my brother, wishing, hoping, for someone to save me from this dreadful nightmare. But as frightened, confused and mad as I felt, I was also glad Adrian couldn't see me like this.
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 ... 12 Next »


Join the Discussion

This book has 24 comments. Post your own now!

TaylorWintryThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 2 at 11:39 pm
The Forgotten Comment Just to tell you in advance, I write my comments while I read so you can get a better feel of my emotions. I apologize sincerely because this will make a REALLY long comment. So here we go. Ch 1 - I love the title of the chapter. First chap. in the book, and BAM it's already the end. Cool effect. I like the repetitiveness in the things she says. "What a rhetorical question, if I'm *here telling you this." Also, you misused "faith." I believe it should be "fate." I really l... (more »)
 
GhostBeam said...
Mar. 17 at 7:10 pm
Amazing!!!!!!
 
just-another-urlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Mar. 21 at 4:26 pm
Thanks for reading !
 
SmileyFace3356 said...
Dec. 3, 2013 at 9:39 pm
This is amazing, every girl wants a bad boy who's good just for her!  Btw, does anyone know how to bookmark cuz I am definitely bookmarking this!
 
just-another-urlThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Mar. 21 at 4:32 pm
Thanks :) I'm not sure how you can bookmark it, I think you can click a link somewhere requesting to receive an email when I publish new chapters (hope that helps).
 
IamMeForeverThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Nov. 27, 2013 at 10:52 pm
More more more!!!
 
Mermaidmissy said...
Oct. 6, 2011 at 9:35 am
Ahh I so love this book it is very good and heartwarming all at the same time. I think you should keep writing more pages soon. Hey can you look at my stuff and see what you like I have poems and one book on this web site so check it out if you have a chance k. Thank You!! :) 
 
EbbaRose said...
Oct. 5, 2011 at 1:08 am
Good story! And great character voice, i love it!!! can't wait to read more!
 
Nikiblue said...
Aug. 13, 2011 at 2:49 pm

I thought the storyline was good and suspenseful. I do have some critics though. I know that a lot of people have already mentioned the spelling errors, and also the weird arrows in the text. Secondly, I feel that a lot of the writing was a little choppy and too quick from one thing to the next. I think more emotion and details should be put in so it feels more as though the reader is there seeing it all for themselves, if that makes any sense?

 

Hopefully I wasn't just rep... (more »)

 
Drive_it_home_with_one_headlight said...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 6:42 pm
I like this a lot. The paragraphing is weird, though. It threw me off a little bit, as well as the arrows instead of the ". Is there any significance to the arrows?
 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 8:43 pm
Sorry about that, I just recently bought an American mac so the sighs changed from the arrows to ". In french we don't have " on the keyboard. Same for the paragraphes. In France books aren't presented the same way. Sorry if it caused any confusion. 
 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 8:44 pm
* signes.  
 
AspiringWriter said...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 12:27 pm

I love the plot; it's very unique. The summary immediately intrigued me. I'd hate to say this again, but you do have a few grammatical errors. It's nothing too big, and it definitely doesn't take away from your story. :)

 

Hmm. What else? I think that you should try adding more descriptions and emotions. Not too much. Just a little. It'll make the story more vivid, if you know what I mean.

 

Great work! :)

 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 8, 2011 at 2:58 pm
Thanks !! I will try adding more description and emotions in my next chapters, I have a hard time with that sort of stuff;) Again thank you for reading !
 
mrs. mom said...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 6:36 pm
as a mom, i love this story - age appropriate but exciting, fun,sensual,etc.-it's great knowing that there are those who like to write something other than "texts" - i just wonder if this writer's nightmares are as interesting - please continue
 
renthead96 said...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 5:52 pm

This is an interesting story. I enjoyed the relationship you created between vampire and zombie--I'm pretty sure I haven't seen that yet. However, there are various spelling/grammar mistakes. You can always have someone else review your chapters to help check for these mistakes: a parent, a sibling, a relative, etc. Just to help with this, I've selected a few common mistakes that you've made to show what you should look for:

"He is aloud to take a break, I'm not angry with Him."more »)

 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 6:51 pm
Thanks Renthead96. The next few chapters are going to be back and forth between Adrian and Darik's view, so you will get more information about the whole vampire and zombie relationship. As for the mistakes, thank you :) Keep posted for more. :) and thanks again for checking this out. It means alot to me !
 
tealbird said...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 1:01 pm
Ok, I'm sorry to say I only had time to read the first chapter of your novel, but I really enjoyed it. I love the tone of the writing, especially the 'big man Upstairs' part :D. Trust me, you had me captivated and I'll be back to read the rest!
 
RockGirl182This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. replied...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 6:42 pm
thanks so much :)
 
Garnet77 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 7, 2011 at 12:11 pm
I really like this story. You do need to revise a few things though. You have a few comma splices--joining two sentences together. Also, I would advise expanding a bit more on the emotional side of your character. Sometimes, she doesn't seem as freaked out as I would have thought. But the story itself is pretty interesting; I can't wait until you post some more. I want to know more about the characters! And I love the whole spin you put on vampires and zombies! Very well done overall! :)
 

Launch Teen Ink Chat
Site Feedback