Heartbreaks & Twisted Metal | Teen Ink

Heartbreaks & Twisted Metal

April 27, 2011
By DonnaNBurgess, Greer, South Carolina
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DonnaNBurgess, Greer, South Carolina
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Author's note: This piece was written as a part of my senior project. I hope all who read it find true enjoyment out of it. Thank you.

Anoela woke up sore in a hospital chair. Again. For the past four months she had just about lived at the hospital. Four months ago her boyfriend of three years, Russ Henson, had been in a terrible car accident. Russ had been driving down a curvy back road when a deer ran out in front of him. Russ had slammed on his breaks and swerved to miss the deer. His efforts were fruitless. The deer collided with the front of his old Silverado pick-up truck, crushing the windshield. On top of that when he had swerved it caused the truck to run off the road and flip more than a dozen times. Russ had suffered severe injuries to his arms and head. Anoela thanked God his old truck had stood up to most of the damage, or the accident would have been much worse. Anoela leaned back in the stiff plastic covered chair, closed her eyes and relived the day of the accident again.

Anoela Golan looked at the clock. It was two, and her shift at Rummies Grille Shack was over. She took off her little blue apron, collected her purse, keys, and cell phone from her work locker, and told her costumers and the owner, Rummie, goodbye as she headed out the door. She smelled of greasy burgers and fries. She was so glad that she’d only had to work from nine to two because it had turned out to be a beautiful June day. The sun was out but not scorching. The wind blew gently but not chilly. Today was the perfect day to be curled up in a hammock reading a book, which is exactly where I’m headed Anoela thought. As she reached her old beat up black jeep, which she had received just a few short months ago, she pulled out her cell phone. Anoela turned it on to find that she had several missed calls and voicemails. She climbed in the car and started the AC up, as she dialed her voicemail.
The first few were from her mother, who worked as a video game sales agent and was always traveling, reminding Anoela to pick up milk and eggs on her way home from work. The second message, again, was from her mother, detailing where she would be traveling for the next two weeks and to call her cell phone if she or her sister, Jenna, needed anything. Anoela sighed and began pulling her long auburn hair out of its secure bun. Her mother worried so much; she didn’t have to-- Anoela had everything under control. The last voice message came on, there was a slight pause then Anoela heard her boyfriend, Russ Henson’s deep southern voice:
“This relationship is going nowhere. Honestly, I don’t even know why we started dating to begin with. I have never really even been attracted to you. Listen, we have been friends since we were toddlers and we can still…what am I saying? I don’t even wanna be friends. I need something more. Maybe this would have worked out if we weren’t so close. Well…see ya. Goodbye, Anoela,” Russ’s voice trailed off, and the voicemail ended.
Anoela played the message a few more times, thinking it was a joke or something because the message sounded very well rehearsed. Anoela had no idea what might have caused the voice message; she could think of nothing wrong she might have done. Anoela and Russ had been dating for nearly three years, since their freshman year of high school to be exact.
Anoela tried to choke back her tears as she attempted to call Russ. The call went straight to voicemail. Anoela sat in her jeep trying not to cry and picking at the frayed edges on her jeans. She tried to call Russ two more times. Again straight to voicemail. She brushed away a couple tears away and decided it would just be best to go home and talk to Russ, since he lived right across the street from her house. A cold hard knot began forming in her stomach as she tossed her cell phone into the passenger seat and headed home. Surely there had to be a reasonable explanation for the message Anoela thought. Still the ten mile drive home had never felt longer.

Anoela lived in a small suburban community in rural Teaksville, South Carolina. It was the sort of town where everyone knew everyone and no one’s business was private. Anoela climbed out of her jeep, with every intention of marching across the street to the Henson’s home and talking with Russ. However, after jumping down from the driver’s seat, she turned around to see there wasn’t a single car parked in the Henson’s driveway. A few more tears escaped her eyes as she collected her things from her car and went into her own cookie-cut-out home. Instead of going upstairs and getting a book to read in the hammock, Anoela headed straight for the kitchen and pulled a tub of triple chocolate fudge brownie ice cream out of the freezer. She tried to call Russ again. Still no answer.
Anoela put the ice cream away after two bites; she was too upset to even eat chocolate. Something just felt off, wrong in a way, like something awful was happening. She pulled her cell out again, this time sending Russ a text that said:
Where are you? I got your voicemail…Please call me, I don’t understand. ~Anoela
I’ll have to leave it at that and pray he calls me back, Anoela thought sadly. Needing to get her mind off of the message she went in search of her fifteen year old sister, Jenna. Anoela didn’t have to go far to find her younger sister. Jenna was sitting on the couch watching cartoons.
At one time Jenna had looked identical to Anoela, the same long auburn hair with blue/green eyes and ivory complexion, but Jenna had reached the age of not wanting to be like her sister at all. Jenna had chopped her auburn locks off for a short pixie look, dying it midnight black. Jenna had also gotten dark brown contacts and began dressing in what she liked to call ‘punk-rock,’ declaring herself to be ‘dark and mysterious’. At the time Anoela hadn’t understood why Jenna had been so unhappy with looking similar, but now she saw how artistic and individualized her sister really was. Anoela leaned against the wall, watching her sister.
Jenna sat there in old purple and black checkered pajama bottoms and a thin cotton shirt, munching on an Almond Joy and laughing at an old Looney Tunes cartoon of Bugs Bunny and Pepé Le Pew that played on the screen.
Anoela giggled and said, “So, dark and mysterious pixie people like the Looney Tunes too.”
Jenna leaped from the couch and ninja rolled onto the floor.
“HOLY CRAP ANOELA!! You just made me loose like six years of my life. Don’t you know how to say hello?! When did you get home…I never even heard the door. Maybe you should pursue becoming an assassin or a ninja.” Jenna rambled.
“I’m sorry I scared you ‘oh dark and mysterious one’.” Anoela taunted playfully, as she plopped down on the couch. Jenna sat down as well and for a few brief moments they watched the cartoon in silence.
Jenna finally cleared her throat and pointed out, “You haven’t watched cartoons with me in years…So what’s up?”
Anoela rolled her eyes and replied “I actually like to spend time with you,” leaping across the couch and tickling Jenna.
An image of Russ popped into her head, and she immediately stopped tickling Jenna. She had to get her mind off this whole situation. Anoela got up off the couch, turned the television off and told Jenna, “Get ready! We are going to the movies!”

About two hours later Jenna and Anoela were standing in the ticket line playfully arguing over what movie they wanted to see. As they finally reached the booth Anoela told Jenna to pick whatever movie she wanted. Anoela immediately regretted giving that freedom as soon as Jenna settled on Zombie Ninja III. After buying the tickets the sisters went inside and splurged on popcorn with extra butter, cotton candy, two drinks, along with a mountain of candy to get them through the film. Anoela and Jenna got into the theater just in time to snatch the last pair of top row seats available. Anoela pulled her cell phone from her pocket and sat it in her lap. Just in case Russ happened to text or call her, as Jenna arranged the candy and drinks around them.
As Anoela’s mind wandered Jenna leaned over and whispered “Thanks sis…this is awesome!” Anoela smiled and told her sister she was glad they had come as the lights went low. Even though she really wasn’t interested in the actual movie, it was nice to have a distraction from thinking about the voice mail that Russ had left.

Less than an hour into the movie Anoela’s phone began to vibrate across her lap. Anoela ignored it and a few minutes later it vibrated again and again and again. Anole leaned over and told Jenna she was going to slip off to the lady’s room. Jenna nodded and waved her off, too interested in the blood and gore on the screen. Anoela scampered quickly down the dimly lit stairs out into the corridor. She looked at the screen on her phone. Disappointingly it wasn’t Russ. Even though the number displayed was unfamiliar, Anoela answered it.
“Anoela….is that you?” a shaky and hitched voice asked.
“Yes it is…who is this?” Anoela said slowly.
“This is Ashleigh Henson, Russ’s mother…I’ve been trying to reach you all day. Anoela…Russ was in a car accident this afternoon.” Mrs. Henson’s voice broke with a sob.
Anoela’s heart seized up and tears began flowing freely down her face, she couldn’t think or speak. Her entire body felt numb. She also couldn’t make sense of Mrs. Henson’s incoherent ramble. All Anoela could say was that she would get to the hospital as soon as she could. Mrs. Henson sobbed out a reply and the line went dead.
Anoela slid down the wall sobbing like a child. She had been angry and upset with Russ the whole day for the not returning her calls or texts and there he’d been in the hospital fighting for his life.
Anoela’s sobs became so loud and painful she attracted the attention of a few employees, who came over and asked if she was alright or needed any assistants. Anoela shook her head.
“Please…go get my sister, Jen…Jenna Go...Gogan. We have to get to the hospital,” Anoela cried to one of the employees.
A few minutes later Jenna appeared, looking a little annoyed. Until she saw her sister doubled over in the floor. Jenna helped Anoela up and swiftly ushered them out of the theater to the Jeep. Jenna physically picked Anoela up and placed her in the passenger seat and buckled her up. Once Jenna too had gotten in the car and locked the doors she turned to her sobbing, incoherent sister.

“Anoela…umm…mind telling me why you were collapsed in the floor? I gotta admit, for once you’re the one scaring me sis.” Jenna began.

Anoela sobbed and wailed out the whole story to Jenna. Once she had spilled everything Jenna cradled Anoela in her arms and let her cry.

“Anoela…everything is going to be okay.” Jenna whispered reassuringly, rubbing her sister’s back.

Jenna was only fifteen and technically too young to drive legally, but she knew her sister couldn’t drive in the condition she was currently in. So, when Anoela’s painful sobs turned into soft whimpers, Jenna took the keys from her sister’s jacket pocket and began driving them carefully to the hospital. Jenna prayed the whole way that, for Anoela’s sake, Russ really was alright. When they arrived at the hospital Russ’s father, Christian updated Anoela on everything that was going on.
Russ had sustained a severe head injury that had left him in a coma. The EEG, a test that records brain activity, showed that Russ’s brain appeared to be functioning normally. Until he woke up they would not know the full extent of the damage. Those were the longest three days of Anoela’s life. She had camped out in the ICU waiting room, leaving only long enough to take her sister home. She neither slept nor ate. On the third night Russ finally regained consciousness and was talking groggily to everyone.
During this time Anoela took Russ’s mother aside and told her about the message he had left her. Ashleigh dismissed it and said they could talk of those things later, when Russ was better. Anoela still hadn’t gotten to talk to Russ about the message because, within the first hours after he had regained consciousness, they knew something was wrong.
Russ kept referring to things that had happened over a year ago. After the nurses had heard some of his comments, they had ushered the family out of his room and called several doctors up. The next two day the doctors had performed several tests on Russ. In the end he was diagnosed with retrograde amnesia. Russ’s head doctor, Edward Jennings, sat down an explained that retrograde amnesia often occurred in patients who had a bad head injury. He explained that this type of amnesia affects memories of events that had occurred a few minutes or years prior to the brain damage. He explained carefully how it could last a few hours or forever. Dr. Jennings had already explained it to Russ. He’d said that Russ had taken it very calmly and still wanted to see his family and Anoela.
Dr. Jennings said he kept begging them to send her in. Dr. Jennings warned everyone not to push him into trying to remember things about the day of the accident because it could cause him to become too stressed and slip back into a coma. Dr. Jennings said that Russ would have to stay in the hospital for a few months, until they were certain he could still function on his own, and enter rehabilitation for the damage he had sustained to his arms during the wreck. The deer’s antlers and glass from the windshield had torn the muscles in his forearms. He made it very clear that Russ would need a strong support system because he had a very long road to recovery to face.
Anoela cut her summer job at Rummies short and had stayed with Russ for the rest of the summer, which flew by; through this time Anoela avoided anything about their relationship. She knew Russ only remembered they were together, not of the message or many other things that had happened in the past year. Even though Russ’s mother encouraged her to forget the whole ordeal he didn’t feel comfortable pretending everything was okay, when she had no idea what was going on. Anoela decided it was best to avoid the relationship topic with Russ. When it was time for their senior year to begin, Russ was still unable to leave the hospital so Anoela changed all her classes to fit Russ’s schedule in order bring his school work to him every day so he wouldn’t fall behind. Anoela had also worked with the school and had gotten a tutor to come to the hospital and help teach Russ things she couldn’t.

Those few months of juggling school and homework, working at Rummies Grille Shack, and helping Russ had drained Anoela. She didn’t know how much longer she’d be able to juggle it all and keep her grades up. It was early October, and the leaves were beginning to change color outside, and the wind was blowing colder. Anoela sat there in the chair staring out the window now, playing with her long auburn hair, thinking of the message Russ had left on her phone.

“What are you thinking about?” Russ asked sweetly from his hospital bed, startling her.
“Hoping your latest tests will come back hospital approved and they’ll let you out of this place. It’d be nice to have you back at school…it’s been lonely.” Anoela said quietly.
Russ got up out of the bed and walked over to where Anoela sat. He sat down beside her and wrapped his huge arms around her shoulders. Anoela leaned into him deeply inhaling the rich smell of spicy men’s deodorant that tickled her nose. What she really missed was him. She longed to hug and kiss him, but she wouldn’t take advantage of the fact he couldn’t remember whether or not he really loved her.
“Thank you…for all you have done for me. I couldn’t have asked for a better girlfriend,” Russ said snuggling up next to her. He pulled back from the hug, beautiful ice blue eyes boring into her own blue/green and leaned in for a kiss as a nurse walked in making both Russ and Anoela jump.
“I have your latest test results.” the nurse explained with a smirk.
Anoela wiggled out of Russ’s arms and stood up. Russ reached for her arm, but she walked over to the door and said “I’ll go get Mr. and Mrs. Henson” and walked out, leaving Russ sad and confused.
Anoela closed the door. Sighing heavily. She longed for things to go back to normal. Anoela leaned her head back trying to beat back the tears on the verge of falling. She wandered down the corridor searching for Ashleigh and Christian. Anoela found them in the small courtyard garden; she and Russ had spent a great deal of time there, either doing school work or talking about everything but their relationship.
Once Anoela and the Henson’s were back in Russ’s hospital room, they buzzed for the nurse to return. This time Dr. Jennings entered with her. Anoela studied him as he flipped through his charts and stacks of analyzed blood tests. He was tall with black curly hair and deep blue eyes shrouded in sadness. Probably from being surrounded by pain, suffering, and death every day, Anoela thought. She wondered how he dealt with everything he had to see or why he ever chose this profession. Since most of her time was spent at the hospital, Anoela had learned a lot about Dr. Jennings. He was not only the head trauma doctor at James M. Condie hospital but a psychiatrist and a physical therapist. No one at the hospital could believe he had accomplished so much and he was only in his thirties. Personally, Anoela figured he was either a genius or a vampire. Anoela chuckled to herself as she imagined Dr. Jennings with vampire fangs. She snapped back to reality when Dr. Jennings cleared his throat and began to speak.
“Russ’s test results show just how much progress this young man has made in the past four months. Not only have his arms healed up fairly nicely and made great strides in the rehabilitation program, for the severe muscle damage he suffered, but at last his CAT scans and EEGs have come back almost completely normal.” He paused to take a deep breath and continued. “I see no problem with him finally going home. However, due to the severity of his amnesia I would like him to continue to see me for counseling. It can be a difficult transition back into society for one who has lost so much, but with the progress Russ has made thus far, I believe he can progress much further…perhaps even fully regain his memories before and of the accident,” Jennings insisted.
The Hensons were ecstatic that Dr. Jennings had finally approved Russ’s discharge. They walked out of the room with him laughing and discussing the best appointment time for Russ to meet with him. Anoela gave a little smile, thinking at least he gets to go home and come back to school. Russ, who’d been sitting across the room on the bed, leapt up and ran to Anoela. Picking her up and swinging her around, tiny circles, in the little hospital room laughing happily. No matter how wonderful this news was Anoela could not be swept up into the happy whirlwind because of that little nagging voicemail tugging at her heart.
The rest of the afternoon Russ and Anoela packed up Russ’s belongs in the hospital room. About six boxes were full of a variety of stuffed animals from puppies to giraffes, their flowers long since wilted. Another box was filled to the very top with ‘get-well’ cards and banners from their friends at school. Finally, one lonely box had a few of Russ’s personal belongs such as; jeans, sweatpants, boxers, and a few old black shirts. The boxes were loaded into the Henson’s SUV. It was only six o’clock; Russ wasn’t allowed to leave until his discharge time, which would be around nine. Russ and Anoela were piled up on the hospital bed watching the small television, mounted on the wall, when the Hensons came back in.
“Hey guys! Ashleigh and I wanted to go get some of Russ’s favorite Mexican food, from that little place up in North Carolina. Plus we want to run by the store and tell everyone how Russ is. If we leave right now, it’d be at the house by the time you two got there. That is…if Anoela wants to drive you home,” Christian exclaimed.
Anoela nodded, and Russ rubbed her back and winked. She didn’t mind taking Russ home while the Hensons went by their family owned hardware store, but she knew it was gonna be an awkward drive home. It was twenty until nine when Russ began growing restless and anxious to leave.
“Is it nine yet?” Russ asked for the millionth time.
Anoela tried to suppress a giggle. “No Russ. We have about fifteen minutes left babe.”
Russ watched the clock and door, sighing every few minutes, complaining how no one would know if they left a teeny tiny bit early. As soon as the clock hit nine Russ rushed to the door, looking for the porter. Russ wanted to leave immediately.
Russ wanted to skip down the hall but, due to HIPA regulations, he had to be escorted to the door in a wheelchair. Along the way they waved goodbye to the many nurses they had met during out their stay. Russ was so excited that when they hit the door he leaped from the chair. Once they finally reached Anoela’s Jeep Russ was like a child who’d eaten too much candy. He was bouncing around singing at the top of his lungs:
“I’m freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! I’m freeeeeee!”
Anoela couldn’t help but laughing as he pulled her to him and dance around in the parking lot. The dance slowed, and soon they were just swaying back a forth. Anoela’s face buried in Russ’s chest and Russ’s chin resting gently upon her soft auburn locks. Anoela never realized just how much Russ towered over her. They continued to sway in silence. Not that either of them minded because it wasn’t an uncomfortable silence, like Anoela had thought it’d be but a blissful ‘just glad to be together’ silence.
Russ pulled away first slowly and kissed Anoela’s forehead softly and murmured that they should probably go home. Anoela could only nod. She didn’t want to leave. Despite the cold breeze she could’ve stayed in his arms, forever, just like that. Still she and Russ climbed in the Jeep and went home. They ended up arriving the same time as Russ’s parents. Anoela watched how happy Russ was to be home and how he kept reaching for her hand throughout the whole meal. Maybe…their lives could go back to the way it was. Before the accident. Before the voicemail.
A few weeks later Anoela was lying peacefully in her bed. It was Saturday, and Anoela was trying to catch up on some much needed sleep. She was in a joyous slumber when someone plopped down on her bed, and she shot up.
“Good morning, Sunshine!” Russ said sweetly.
Jenna peeked around the door and said something along the lines of I tried to tell him. Then she disappeared from the doorway.
Anoela moaned. “That is such a dirty word on a Saturday. No teen should even acknowledge that Saturday has a morning.”
Anoela groaned and leaned back against her headboard. Russ laughed and lay down next to her, laying his head in her lap. They sat in silence while Anoela absentmindedly stroked Russ’s hair and the dozens of crescent shaped scars on his forearm. She had almost dozed off again when Russ spoke.
“I have surprise for you…” he hedged.
“Oh really? Why do I get a surprise?” Anoela asked.
“Why wouldn’t you get one…you’re an angel. You’re always here for me…most girls would’ve just walked away after…everything,” Russ replied carefully as he sat up and began playing with the frayed edges of Anoela’s bedspread.
“Well I’m not ‘most girls’. Plus, we’ve always been there for each other. I’m always going to try and be here for you. Always. Even if you don’t need me,” Anoela pointed out. Then she added, “What’s my surprise?”
Russ sat there quietly taking in what Anoela had said. He nodded in silent agreement and murmured, “Same here.” Russ sat there quietly seeming to be lost in some far off memory until Anoela asked again what her surprise was.
He snuggled up closer to her and exclaimed, “In order to get your surprise you’re going to have to acknowledge that there is such a thing as Saturday morning and get up!”
“Hmm…I don’t think I want it that bad,” Anoela laughed as she snuggled down under her blankets. Russ feigned a sad expression then roared with laughter as he ripped the covers off her and began tickling her.
About an hour later Anoela and Russ were driving down the road. It was the first time Russ had driven since his accident, and he was doing surprisingly well. Anoela kept pestering him about where they were going and what the surprise was. Russ just laughed and kept driving. About twenty minutes later Russ pulled off the road into a field.
Russ got out of the SUV and went around helping Anoela out. Then he led her carefully across the field to a very old weeping willow, where a picnic had been set out. Anoela grinned. This was the same field where they had had their very first date years ago. They ended up spending their whole Saturday there, munching on ham sandwiches and Little Debbie cakes. They also talked and laughed in a way they hadn’t since Russ had woken up. It was the sweetest surprise Anoela had ever gotten.
The next day Russ had to go back to the hospital to meet with Dr. Jennings. Russ enjoyed their visits because he found Dr. Jennings to be a very honest and upstanding man. However, Russ did not enjoy having to go back in the hospital. Russ arrived at the hospital around two, after spending the morning with Anoela and Jenna making pancakes. Russ sighed. Since he woke up from his car accident, it felt as though Anoela was trying to distance herself from him. Maybe…something bad happened the day of my accident. Maybe we argued. Did I hurt her feelings? There’s a lot I’m missing. Russ thought sadly to himself.
Russ and Dr. Jennings’s meeting was cut short due to an emergency surgery that Dr. Jennings was needed for. Jennings told Russ to just focus on school, his family, and Anoela, telling him the rest would fall in to place when it wanted to. Then he rushed out leaving Russ with a million more things to ponder.
Since Russ’s meeting was cut short he decided to go and visit his best friends Mason Robinson and Tyler Spencer. Russ drove across town to the Teaksville’s only arcade, and more than likely the place Mason and Tyler would be.
The arcade didn’t have a name; it was just an old run-down casino turned arcade. It had a vast variety of games, from Pac-Man and Tron to Space Invaders and pool tables. As soon as Russ entered he could spot his two best friends playing a game of pool.
Russ could spot them easily because his friends always stood out. Mason Robinson was about sixteen and nearly as tall as Russ. Just one look and people knew that boy was country through and through. He was tall and wiry with soulful green eyes. He usually had his short dark brown hair spiked haphazardly, but today he wore a black cowboy hat to cover his unruly locks. Tyler was seventeen and the shortest one in the group. He was slightly pudgy with geeky bottle coke type glasses. He was a big gamer; however, pool was not his forte. Russ could see his he had no chance of winning a game of pool against ‘cool-country boy’ Mason. Since his accident Russ had barely been able to speak with them, much less spend time with them. He strode over to where the boys stood, picking up a pool stick he poked Tyler in the rear. Tyler nearly leapt onto the pool table as Mason burst out laughing.
“Whoa!” Tyler yelped. “I don’t…I’m not like that!” he sputtered.
“Calm down, Ty. I don’t either.” Russ laughed.
“Dang boy! Where you been? Anoela keepin’ you on a choke collar now?” Mason asked.
“Why would you say that? She’s sweet to me. Not once has she been controlling.” Russ argued.
Tyler, who had finally climbed off the pool table added. “That’s not what you were saying a few days before your accident.”
All three stood in silence for a moment before Russ mustered up the courage to ask.
“What did I say before the accident?”
Mason coughed. “Nothing, man. It wasn’t important or anything. You were just acting weird.” Mason tried to assure Russ.
“Weird. How?” Russ asked suspiciously.
The silence was heavy. Then Mason spoke.
“That’s just it…you wouldn’t tell us anything. You just kept sayin’ you were sick of Anoela. When we asked what was wrong...you blew us off. You stopped hanging out with us and her. You’d go off on your own. We don’t know where you’d go…”

Russ looked at the floor as if the ugly greenish black carpet would will all his memories back.
“What do you think I was doing?” Russ asked hesitantly.
Mason chuckled. “I figured you’d found some sexy chick to occupy yourself with.”
“WHAT! Why would I do that to Anoela!?” Russ raged.
“Listen. Anoela’s not all sweet and cute. I think, before your accident, that you were starting to figure that out.” Mason admitted coldly.
“Why do you say that?” Russ demanded.

Mason snapped. “You always acted like that stupid girl was your WHOLE WORLD! You’d ditch us to be with her. Ty and I have always hated you two together. I was glad when you started ditching her, too.”
Russ stood there reeling as Mason stormed out of the arcade. Ty, who had remained silent for the duration of the conversation, looked sadly at Russ and added
“I don’t like you with Anoela because I felt like she was taking you away. Mason feels that too…I think. However, I accepted she wasn’t going anywhere. Do you know why? You were happy with her. You were a better person with her. So…maybe you should forget about trying to remember stuff. Whatever you did, remembering it, won’t be worth loosing Anoela. Just go be happy Russ.” Then Tyler too left the arcade.
Russ wandered out to the SUV. He climbed in and laid his head on the steering wheel. What did I do? Had I found another girl? Why would I hurt Anoela like that? What could she have ever done to make me turn from her? Did she think something was up? Russ’s mind whirled. He wanted to rush to Anoela and hold her, but something deep in his heart told him he had no right to.
The next few weeks of schools were as slow as molasses. The mornings got colder and plants began fading under Jack Frost’s wintery kisses. The first semester of senior year was starting to wind down. Final projects and exams kept Russ and Anoela busy as bees.
One morning, as Jenna and Anoela were arriving at Marco High School, Anoela’s best and only girl friend Jordan Teague came rushing up. She grabbed Anoela from the driver’s seat and threw her up against the Jeep.
Jordan was tiny so this seemed an impossible feat for her to accomplish since Anoela probably outweighed her by fifty pounds. At about five seven, Jordan was just a bit taller than Anoela, with naturally straw blonde hair and dark blue eyes. She was always been considered the “All-American-Beauty” of their school. Anoela had always mused to herself that Jordan had all the same physical attributes as a ‘mean girl’ in typical teenage movies. In fact, the whole summer it had felt as though Jordan had shunned her.
Jordan had been talking throughout Anoela’s random thoughts and was now looking at her expectantly for some kind of answer. When Anoela provided nothing Jordan rolled her eyes.
“You weren’t even paying attention, were you?” Jordan stormed.
Anoela shook her head sheepishly. By this time Jenna had gotten out of the Jeep and was giving Jordan a death stare.
Jordan sighed. “As I was saying. I’m behind on my GOV/ECON project, and I like totally need your help. So meet me in the library after school today.”
“I already finished mine. Russ is almost finished with his too. We could meet you and I could help you both finish up.” Anoela said aloud absentmindedly just as Russ walked over to them.
“I don’t care. Just be there after school. I can’t fail GOV/ECON or there will be no skiing for me over winter break. Anoela that would be a tragedy. Do you know how many ski instructors would just be heartbroken if this didn’t show up?! A lot.” Jordan related.
Russ looked at the girl oddly. He didn’t remember her. Jenna snorted, storming off. She didn’t even tell Anoela bye.
Anoela nodded and sighed. Jordan giggled ecstatically and rushed off. She hadn’t even acknowledged Russ. Sometimes Jordan had a one-track mind, but Anoela had accepted that she would always be like that.
“Umm…Anoela…who was that? Do I know her? Am I friends with her?” Russ asked.
“That’s Jordan Teague. She and her family moved here from Las Vegas. I’m not really sure what ya’ll were…” Anoela revealed, and then added. “…friends, I guess.”
“Oh well. Whatever. She doesn’t seem interesting.” Russ decided as he took Anoela’s hand and walked them into school.
Marco High School had been built forever ago. The age of the old brick building was clearly visible on the outside. However, once you entered, it was as though you had gone back in time…to the 50’s maybe.
Most of the school had hardwood floors so almost everywhere smelled like lemon floor polish. The floor lengthen lockers were black with old twist-n-yank locks. The whole school had an old, respected feeling to it that Anoela had always loved. The only truly new thing in the school was the whiteboards the school had sprung for about a decade ago.
After school ended Anoela found Jenna and asked if she’d take the bus home so she could help Russ and Jordan finish their projects. Jenna just rolled her eyes and stormed off down the hall.
Out of all the places at school the library was Anoela’s favorite place to be. The stacks were made of pinkish sort of wood which gave the library a welcoming glow. The librarian was an elderly ‘grandmotherly’ type woman, one you always expected to offer you milk and cookies.
Jordan was already sitting at a table when Russ and Anoela arrived.
“Where have you been?! I’ve been waiting for like ten minutes.” Jordan pouted.
“I had to make sure Jenna had a ride home. Then I had to go find Russ.” Anoela indicated by lifting their intertwined hands.
Jordan rolled her eyes. “Whatever. I just want to pass GOV/ECON.”
Russ looked back and forth between the two girls. How could they possible be friends? Anoela’s kind and considerate. Jordan’s selfish and rude. Russ contemplated silently however, his thoughts were cut short by Anoela saying they should get down to business.
About an hour later Russ had finished his twelve page paper for GOV/ECON. Jordan had gotten very little done. She had gabbed the whole time they had been in the library, and it didn’t take long for her to bring up his accident.
“So…you don’t remember anything from the year before your accident?” Jordan questioned.
“Nope. Not a thing.” Russ answered annoyed.
“Don’t you WANT to remember?” Jordan emphasized.
Russ said, “I’d like to remember, but if I don’t…I think it’ll be alright. I don’t need those memories when I can make new ones with Anoela and my friends. As long as I have them, I’m gonna be okay.” Russ leaned over and grabbed Anoela’s hand. Russ looked into Anoela’s eyes as she blushed immensely. Suddenly, Jordan slammed her GOV/ECON book, making Anoela and Russ jump.
“I cannot believe this bullcrap,” Jordan complained.
Anoela started to assure Jordan soothingly. “Oh, Jordan, the papers not that...”
Jordan cut her off. “It has nothing to do with the paper stupid.”
“Don’t you dare talk to Anoela like that!” Russ glowered.
“Puh-lezz. You have said far worse about her,” Jordan related hatefully.
“Jordan…what are you talking about?” Anoela sputtered.
Jordan laughed, “I’m talking about how your ‘boyfriend’ was cheating on you--with me.”
Anoela’s mind reeled. Suddenly she was reliving bits of moments when she had wondered if Russ was cheating. Things made sense. Before the accident he had been acting a little different. He’d wanted to hangout less and less. Then the voicemail. Anoela looked to Russ for some kind of answer. Russ was looking at the table. His eyes searched wildly, trying to remember.
“Why would I cheat on Anoela? Why would I turn to you if I had?” Russ asked angrily.
“You wanted something Anoela couldn’t give you I guess.” Jordan said wickedly.
An icy feeling slid down Anoela’s throat and twisted around her stomach. Every bit of odd behavior started fitting together to create a heartbreaking puzzle.
“Anoela…” Russ started.
“Don’t…” Anoela whispered as tears began to blur her world. She gathered her things and left Jordan and Russ behind. Russ jumped up to follow her, but then decided he’d get the whole story first then find Anoela.
After Anoela disappeared Russ turned to Jordan, tears in his eyes, and said. “Tell me everything.”
Jordan hesitated. Russ laughed coldly. “Don’t stop now Jordan. You already opened a can of worms. You might as well finish what you started.”
“It started when Anoela was sick last May. We were all supposed to go to the movies. She was so sick she couldn’t go, but she encouraged us to still go. By the ended of the night, we were all over each other. You told me you wished we were dating. We grew very ‘close’ over the next month. You barely needed a word from me to ditch your best friends. You finally even started ditching Anoela.” Jordan divulged.
“Did we…” Russ began.
Jordan steamed, “NO! We hadn’t.”
Russ sighed in relief. At least he hadn’t had sex with her. For one, it’d suck if he couldn’t remember something so special and two, he was pretty sure he’d always wanted to be with Anoela.
Jordan giggled sweetly, smirking as she said. “You know the day of you accident I told you that you had to decide between Anoela and me. You were already calling her to tell her it was over as you left.”
“I think your lying,” Russ insisted.
Jordan walked over, slid into his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck murmuring, “It’s true. You loved being with me.”
Russ stood up, attempting to leave; Jordan fell from his lap with a hard thud. He stormed out of the library.
After fleeing the library, Anoela had rushed to car. Anoela put her car in drive and hit the gas. She didn’t even look to the door to see if Russ was following her. She didn’t want to know.
When Anoela got home, Jenna was sound to sleep on the couch. Tears still streamed down her face as she removed Jenna’s books carefully and flicked the lamp off. Then she headed up stairs where she flopped down on her bed, never planning to move again.
Jenna was startled awake by the door bell’s repetitive chimes. She jumped up, remembering Anoela had stayed late at school, Jenna didn’t remember hearing her come in. Her heart lurched as she thought please don’t be about Anoela or Russ. She flung open the door to find a sad and disheartened looking Russ. She peered over his shoulders to see her sister’s Jeep parked in the drive. She’s so dead when I get a hold of her. She didn’t even tell me she was home, Jenna thought as she looked at Russ again. Russ hung his head as though someone had taken everything from him.

“Wow. You look rough. What’d ya do? Lose your best friend?” Jenna asked nonchalantly.
Russ burst out in a madman ramble. “Did she tell you? Jenna, I didn’t know! Please let me speak to her. I need to see her!”
Jenna was taken aback and replied “What are you talking about? I guess I was asleep when Anoela came home; she didn’t wake me. I have no idea what your talking about, but I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say no you can neither see or speak to her until I have.” With that Jenna started to shut the door. Then Russ’s sneaker rammed through the crack. Jenna yelped and jumped back. The door reopened.
Russ pulled his foot back and looked at the ground as he pleaded with Jenna. “Jenna…please tell her I’m sorry. I can honestly say I don’t know what happened, but whatever I did was wrong. Tell her…I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to her. If she’ll let me.”
Jenna gave Russ a sad look. She had deep suspicion that whatever had happen…it wouldn’t be easy to forgive. She nodded at Russ and said she’d tell Anoela verbatim what he’d said. Russ nodded and thanked her. Jenna didn’t think she’d ever seen a guy cry like that. Ever. She wanted to give him some kind of hopeful response, but if Russ had hurt her sister, there was no hope to give him. She shut the door on his sad and tearstained face.
Jenna took the stairs two at a time as she raced up to Anoela’s room. School let out around 3:15. The latest the library stays open is 5:15 so Anoela would have gotten home sometime around 6. It is now…nearly 9. So she’s been home about 3 hours give or take a few minutes, Jenna thought, Honestly can she not let anyone know she’s home.
Jenna tiptoed to the door and pressed her ear to it. Silence. Jenna eased the door open carefully. Jenna had hoped to see her sister sitting up reading another book and threatening her with a pillow if she didn’t learn to knock. No such luck. The room was pitch black. Jenna whipped out her cell, using its glow as a dim flashlight.

Jenna snuck across the room, careful to not knock over the many stacks of books in the floor. She reached Anoela’s bed. It looked like there someone in it. Jenna then slid up to the headboard and leaned down.
Anoela had pulled the covers over her head. She’s awake. I know it, Jenna thought as she stifled a giggled. She sat down in the floor beside her sister’s bed and sent Anoela a text.
Hey!!! I’m going to a wild topless party with kids that are way too old for me! Don’t wait up. ;) Luvs ~Pixie Jenna
Jenna waited patiently as she waited for her sister to pop up from the bed to stop her. She heard the phone vibrate. Jenna’s eyes had just adjusted to the dark as a hand popped out from under the covers and tossed the phone into the floor, hitting Jenna in the head. Jenna had had enough. She jumped up; yanking back the covers she clicked on her sister’s bedside lamp.
Anoela was laying there, eyes open and full of tears, staring off in some unknown space. She didn’t even acknowledge Jenna. She just stared off into space. Jenna grabbed a tissue and tried to wipe away some of the tears slowly rolling down Anoela’s face.
“What happened?” Jenna asked.
Silence.
“Anoela…Russ was here a few minutes ago. He wanted to talk to you. Did he hurt you?” Jenna asked. “If he did I’ll gut him like a codfish!” she added, hopeful for a response.
Silence.
Jenna was getting desperate for Anoela to say something. “Sissy…please tell me what’s wrong. I’ll listen. Please say something. Anything,” Jenna pleaded.
Suddenly Anoela broke out in a fresh wave of sobs and choked out some incoherent line that sounded a lot like get out. She yanked the covers back over her head and continued to sob hysterically. Jenna took her hint and left Anoela’s room. Stumbling over books as she left. She was usually the one who was cruel when she was upset. Anoela was the one who loved to curl up with ice cream and talk about everyone’s problems. Something bad had definitely happened.
Jenna went to the living room and curled up on the old black couch. She pulled out her cell phone and texted Russ.
So my sister just kicked me out of her room while sobbing uncontrollably. Wouldn’t know anything about that now would you? :’( ~Pixie Jenna
Russ replied almost instantly.
She didn’t tell you anything? ~Russ-n-Anoela
Oh yea...Wow thanks rub it in that she won’t tell me anything. : / ~Pixie Jenna
No that’s not what I was doing…can I please come over. Just let me talk with her. ~Russ-n-Anoela
ABSOULTELY NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ~Pixie Jenna
I’m sorry Jenna. I can honestly say I don’t know what I was thinking. ~Russ-n-Anoela
Omg. Don’t use the whole ‘I have amnesia so I cant be held responsible for what I did before’ crap! ~Pixie Jenna
I’m not Jen. I really…I can’t fathom what I could have possibly been thinking! ~Russ-n-Anoela
Agh! I don’t care. Leave my sister alone. No texting. No talking. No contact. She’s like a zombie because of something you did! I’m going to bed now. Something tells me I better be up in time to catch the bus if she’s still like this in the morning. GOODBYE. ~Pixie Jenna
Jenna had punched the letters on her phone so hard she was pretty sure she could be put in jail for phone abuse. She, too, ended up tossing her phone across the room.
Russ was sitting on his front porch as he saw the lights in the living room go off. Russ sat there in the cold December night, wishing he would freeze so he wouldn’t have to feel this sharp pain in his chest.
The next morning, when Jenna had checked, Anoela hadn’t moved from her cave of covers. Jenna told her she was going to school like a good little girl. Jenna got no reply. She sighed and headed to school. It was going to be a long, sad, and lonely day. Jenna honestly thought things couldn’t get any worse until she got on the bus and heard about everything that had happened between Anoela, Russ, and…Jordan.
Jenna had never liked Jordan. Not even as a living thing. Jordan was a zit on the rear of society in her eyes. Once at school Jenna went in search of, in her eyes, the world’s latest blemish…Russ.
Smack. Swat. Swat. Thud. Smack. Russ nearly jumped across the hall as Jenna began beating him in the arms and chest with her huge biology book. Russ could see by the cold look that she knew what had happened. Thanks to Jordan it was all over school.
“Who. Do. You. Think. You. Are?!” Jenna shouted, punctuating each word with a good swat to a part of Russ’s body. He tried several times to snatch the book or grab her arm. No such luck, the hormone raging tween was hell bent on venting her anger.
“Jenna stop! You’re causing a scene,” Russ scolded.
“I don’t care if I ‘cause a scene’! Since when have I EVER cared about how OTHER people see me!” Jenna pointed out, panting. She’d really put all her energy into hitting Russ.
“Where’s Anoela?” Russ demanded.
“Thanks to you probably still cowering under her blankets." Jenna replied curtly.
“Oh…has she said anything at all?” Russ asked.
Jenna gave him the dirtiest look she could muster. Russ looked at the floor. When he looked back up Jenna was stalking down the hall. Russ raced to catch up with her.
“Where are you going? Isn’t your homeroom the other way?” Russ asked, dreading the answer.

Jenna turned on a dime. It was at that moment Russ realized she didn’t have her usually brown contacts in. The eyes that were staring him down were identically blue green to Anoela’s. Russ wished Anoela would look at him with that much anger and just tell him how she felt.
“Listen. I have someone who takes care and watches out for me. It’s not you. Back off,” Jenna replied flatly.
“Just don’t go and do anything stupid. Please. Your sister is already mad at me. I don’t need her to hate me anymore,” Russ begged.
Jenna turned and said with a sweet grin. “Now would I ever do anything stupid?” With that she continued to saunter down the hall. Russ had the sneaking suspicion that today was about to get much worse. He sighed and headed to homeroom.
Jenna had been honest with Russ when she’d said she didn’t plan on doing anything stupid, but when she’d seen Jordan flouncing around during lunch, acting like she was on top of the world. Jenna felt it was her civic duty to bring her down a few pegs.
Russ had been sitting out in the picnic area with Mason and Tyler for lunch. Russ was deep in thought while Mason and Ty were talking about everything they could to steer the conversation away from Anoela and Jordan. Ty had gotten so desperate he’d started rambling about the complex workings and strategies of the latest video game when they heard the familiar fight chant. Everyone in the picnic area looked toward the door curiously. Mason flew off their table like his life depended on it to go check out the fight. Tyler just looked happy that he didn’t have to talk anymore. Mason reappeared in a nanosecond trying to stifle a laugh. Russ’s lunch formed a cold knot in his stomach as Mason told him he might wanna go check it out himself. Russ leaped up and rushed to the door. At first all Russ could see were a mass group of students gathered in a circle. He pushed and squeezed his way through the hoard to find Jenna and Jordan in a full on catfight.
Jenna had Jordan pinned to the ground. She had both her sharp knees pressed into Jordan’s shoulders keeping her from wiggling. One of Jenna’s hands was wrapped with Jordan’s blonde hair while the other hand punching her in the face. Jenna had Jordan in a death grip and showed no sign of stopping or giving Jordan a chance to throw a punch.
Russ stood there in surprise at first he couldn’t believe how well Jenna could fight. He was shocked and didn’t really know what to do. Then Mason was beside him tapping on Russ’s shoulder and pointing to the teachers who were trying to make their way through the crowd.
“Might wanna grab that.” Mason observed pointing to Jenna and added, “I’m sure Anoela will hate you even more if her sister gets suspended over any of this.”
Russ nodded. He reached and snatched Jenna right up and backed up into the mix of students. As he was backing up, with Jenna flailing around crazily, he caught Jordan’s swelling eye. She gave him a dirty look. How did I ever get into this mess? Russ thought to himself.
Mason and Russ finally dragged Jenna out to the picnic area. They tossed her onto the table scaring poor Tyler. When she attempted to get up and run to the door Mason pushed her farther back, jumping up on the table, he placed a firm knee in Jenna’s chest.
“Chill ankle biter.” Mason said coaxingly.
Jenna wiggled for a few more minutes before she cut Mason a dirty look, obviously she wasn’t going anywhere.
“Listen. I know Jordan and right now she probably wants to murder you. However, Jordan is also a kiss-up and won’t want a lot of attention that she got her butt handed to her by a freshman. So if you stay here and lay low for a few nothing will happen but if you go back in there all ‘high and mighty’ you’ll probably get suspended. You don’t want that for your sister, now do you?” Mason leaned over and explained. She glowered but seemed to get the gist of it. The bell rang, to signal lunch was over, and Mason finally let her up from the table. Jenna scampered inside never looking back. Russ didn’t see her for the rest of the day.
After school Jenna walked home. She was glad that she and Anoela wouldn’t have to return to school until after Christmas break. She hoped by the time they returned Anoela would be out of the mood she was in.
As soon as Jenna got home she rushed upstairs to check on Anoela. She still hadn’t moved. Jenna walked over to her sister’s side, she was asleep. Anoela’s hair looked greasy; her skin looked blotchy and worn out from crying. Jenna shook her awake.
“Get up. Get in the shower and get clean. Then be down in the kitchen in twenty minutes to help me make dinner,” Jenna demanded.
Anoela grumbled something incoherent. Jenna reached down picked up Anoela’s mattress and flipped it over tossing her sister into the floor. Anoela sat up in shock giving her sister a dirty look.

Jenna shrugged. “Like I said get up.”
After Jenna coaxed Anoela into the shower she went back to Anoela’s room, picked up the mattress and re-made the bed. She picked up her sister’s cell phone, that was still in the same spot it had landed the night before, and headed down stairs to the kitchen.
Anoela came down not long after and helped make dinner, which was PB&Js since Anoela hadn’t taken them shopping. Anoela looked a little better after a shower. Jenna attempted to talk with Anoela, telling her that she’d turned in the last of her reports in for finals and that all of her teachers hoped she’d feel better soon. Anoela grunted as she picked at her sandwich. Jenna gave up, and they finished their meal in silence. Afterward Anoela went back up stairs and crawled back into her bed. Jenna stayed down stairs in the living room watching Looney Tune cartoons the rest of the afternoon.
The entire break was miserable. Jenna was alone almost 24/7 except for the few brief minutes she forced Anoela to come down stairs and eat a sandwich. Anoela was still in a zombie like state. Russ came over every afternoon begging to talk with Anoela. Jenna always denied him. Russ text Anoela everyday, but she refused to even reply to that; she’d even resorted to cutting her cell phone off.
Then four days before Christmas day their mother called saying she couldn’t make it home for Christmas. She told Jenna she’d put enough money in the bank for them to spent around five hundred dollars a piece on whatever they wanted. Jenna told Anoela about their mother and the money. They never went shopping and Christmas morning was bare and lonely for Jenna. She and Anoela didn’t even go and get a Christmas tree. Anoela stayed in her room the whole day, while Jenna sat on the couch and watched Christmas cartoon re-runs.
The next day Russ came over and knocked on the door. A bleary-eyed and very sad looking Jenna answered the door.
“What do you want?” She asked
“To see Anoela.” Russ replied.

To Russ’s surprise Jenna stepped back and waved him to come in.

“Go. Talk with her. Maybe you can get something out of her,” Jenna added disheartened.

Russ looked around the house. Not a single Christmas decoration. The Anoela he knew would’ve covered every inch of the house in decorations with the holiday Chipmunk’s music constantly playing. Jenna returned to the living room. Russ took a deep breath and went up stairs. Russ hadn’t spoken to Anoela in nearly three weeks. Three miserable, lonely, and sad weeks, Russ thought as he reached Anoela’s door.

He knocked. She didn’t reply. Russ called out her name. She didn’t reply. He knocked a few more times. When she still didn’t reply Russ pressed his head against the door and said:

“I know you’re hurting. I know you’re sad. I know it’s my fault, and I’m sorry…but you shouldn’t take it out on Jenna. You should have pulled yourself together…if only for her. You didn’t even decorate for Christmas with her. You can be sad/mad at me but don't shut out your sister. This is all my fault…and I’m sorry. Please…please feel better.”

Russ stood there for a moment hoping Anoela would open the door or at least acknowledge him, but all remained silent. He finally gave up and went back down stairs. Russ told Jenna that he’d see her later and that she could always call him if she needed him. Jenna nodded. Russ left, feeling more miserable than before.

Anoela sat in room sobbing. Russ is right. I’ve been an awful sister. I let Jenna down…I abandoned her. I could have at least faked being alright and given her a wonderful Christmas after she fretted and took care of me, Anoela thought sadly. Then an idea came to her.

The next morning Jenna awoke in her bed. This was a clear shock to her because she knew she had fallen asleep on the couch last night. She got up and stumbled across the room to her door, through it she could hear a faint high pitch musical voice. Jenna swung open her bedroom door to find tons of tinsel and garland strewn everywhere. To be honest it looked like someone had thrown up Christmas everywhere.

Jenna blinked several times, believing it was all a dream. She went down into the living room to find a huge fir tree decked out in glistening lights, garland, glass balls, and old handmade ornaments. Boxes, wrapped in bright paper, were piled high on either side of it. She entered the kitchen to find Anoela, clean and freshly clothed, flipping pancakes and softly singing along with holiday music. Jenna opened the refrigerator. It was full of fresh food.

Jenna closed the refrigerator door with a thud. Anoela jumped. She turned around and gave Jenna a semi-happy smile.

“What is all this?” Jenna asked.

Anoela turned around and answered, “Christmas.”

Jenna rolled her eyes and said firmly. “Christmas is December 25th. That was two days ago.”

“I know…and I’m...” Anoela started.

Jenna cut her off. “Don’t let it happen again.”

Anoela smiled, and she handed Jenna a plate full of pancakes.

“So how’d you get all this done in one night?” Jenna demanded curiously.

Anoela bit her lip and explained. “After Russ left yesterday I kept coming down stairs to see if you were asleep. Once you were, I dragged you up to your room and set to work. I went out and bought food, a tree, and presents. Then came home and decorated the entire house before midnight. I spent the rest of the night and most of this morning wrapping gifts.”

Jenna, still a little shocked, nodded. They finished their breakfast in peaceful silence. Afterward, they opened gifts. Anoela had actually went on Jenna’s computer and found the Christmas list she’d be accumulating the whole year. On top of that Anoela had managed to find just about everything on the list. Jenna wanted to be mad, but she could see that Anoela was trying hard. After opening gifts they piled up on the couch and started watching the twenty-five DVD Looney Tunes Box Set Jenna had unwrapped. Two and a half DVDs later Jenna peeked out the window to find a thick fluffy layer of snow on the ground. She looked across the street and noticed that the Hensons’ car was gone. Russ must have gone to see Jordan, Jenna thought. She and Anoela spent the rest of their ‘Christmas Day’ on the couch eating and watching television. In fact, that’s where they ended up spending the last three days of their winter break.

After leaving Anoela’s house Russ made his way to Mason’s. It’d be best to get away for a few days. That way I don’t constantly look outside and want to run over there like some kind of creeper., Russ thought. He was hoping that a little time with Mason and Tyler would do him so good…but Mason wouldn’t drop the topic of Anoela and Jordan.

“So whose it gonna be?” Mason pried.

“What do you mean, whose it gonna be. Anoela of course.” Russ growled.

“I don’t know man…Jordan’s got one hot body.” Mason purred.

Russ sighed, choosing to ignore Mason he turned the conversation to Tyler. “What are you playing now?”

Tyler, too absorbed in his fantasy world, ignored Russ. Leaving him with only Mason to talk to.

“Mason…I don’t know what happened or what I was thinking. All I know is that I care very deeply for Anoela…and when I look at Jordan, hot body or not, I feel anger and the urge to strangle her,” Russ finally answered.

“Some people like to be strangled.” Mason said with a wink.

Russ groaned. “Why is life so complicated!? I just wanna fix things between me and Anoela.”

“Russ. Man. Do you even know what you and Anoela are? Like are ya‘ll together? Broken up? Are you sure you aren’t with Jordan?” Mason laughed.

“Anoela and I did not break up, and I am definitely NOT with Jordan,” Russ spat.

Suddenly, Tyler turned around acknowledging for a few brief seconds that there was life beyond video games and joined the conversation.

“You want to fix things with Anoela. You give her some space. She stayed with you after your car accident, thinking wholeheartedly that ya’ll were together. I bet she has no idea how to feel about you cheating on her with her ‘best friend.’ Give her some time. Geez, just back off her a little.” Tyler stated bluntly and returned to his video game.

Russ and Mason looked at Tyler incredulously. He could be pretty smart when he wanted to be. By this time Russ looked out the window, it was gently snowing outside. Maybe Tyler was right. Maybe he needed to back off from Anoela.

The morning of the first day back to school and the start of a new semester Anoela hoped it’d be great. In the past three days she felt as though she had settled down from the whole Russ/Jordan thing. At least…Jenna made her feel like she had. Once they arrived at school though it was a different matter.

Anoela figured that, once she returned to school, she’d get some looks from people. However, she didn’t expect getting so many dirty looks as she walked down the hallway with her sister. This is embarrassing, Anoela thought. I didn’t do anything wrong.

Jenna stood by her sister until the bell rang for homeroom. She squeezed her sister’s hand and told her not to worry that she’d see her at lunch. Then Jenna slipped into the stream of students and vanished.

Russ entered the school head held high; hoping people had dropped the drama with Jordan. He made it halfway down the hall when he saw Anoela. She looked like she dropped twenty pounds over winter break, not that she had ever been fat. Russ felt the overwhelming urge to rush to her side, but he remained where he was. Giving Anoela the space she deserved, after all he’d done. Russ turned around, walked right back down the hallway and went right back out the door. Skipping today would be for the best…this was I know I don’t bother her, Russ thought glumly as he decided to go home, with the lie of a headache as his excuse.

By lunch, both Jenna and Anoela knew why Anoela was getting such dirty looks. Jordan had been spreading nasty rumors about Anoela during the break. They were crazy rumors. But damaging.

One rumor was that Russ cheated on Anoela because Anoela had cheated on him first. With whom no one knew so each took liberties and added to the cocktail of lies. Another was that while Russ had been in the hospital Anoela had never even gone and seen him. This one had to be the most ridiculous because so many people had seen Anoela there when they dropped off cards, candy, and stuff for Russ. The last rumor was probably the worst and most hurtful to Anoela. The last rumor, to the girl’s knowledge, was that Russ had never loved Anoela. That one is the only one that might even be true, Anoela thought sadly to herself.

Jenna found Anoela in the bathroom crying over the rumors. Jenna had worked fast and traced each rumor back to its original source. Jordan. Jenna sat in the floor of the bathroom and rocked Anoela while she cried. After a few minutes Anoela spoke.

“I…wanna….wanna go home.” Anoela whimpered pleadingly.

Jenna bit her lip. She didn’t want to leave early their first day back, but she wasn’t about to leave her sister alone. She nodded and held Anoela as they went to the office, where Anoela faked being sick, and they signed out.

Russ’s hooky day turned into nearly a hooky week. The day he came home he came down with the flu. He returned to school on Wednesday and went searching for Anoela. He found Tyler fretting in the hall.

“Russ! Where have you been? I’ve looked for you all week?!” Tyler exclaimed.

“I was sick with the flu, I think.” Russ explained.

“Have you talked to Anoela?” Tyler asked.

Russ shook his head and replied. “I’m actually looking for her.”

“You won’t find her. Neither she nor Jenna have been back since Monday.” Tyler revealed.

“Why?” Russ demanded.

Tyler looked at him and asked. “Have you not heard the rumors?”

Russ turned paled. “No…what rumors?”

Tyler looked down the hall at a gossipy group of girls herding down the hall, Jordan the center of attention.

Russ started toward her.

“NO! Russ, she isn’t worth it. You need to worry about Anoela, not her.” Tyler insisted, trying to hold Russ back. Tyler was about to lose his grip on Russ when Mason showed up and yanked Russ back by his shirt.

“She can be handled later. You need to go talk with Anoela.” Mason pointed out.

Russ finally chilled out and Mason let him go. Russ nodded his thanks and darted to the front office. However, the secretary wouldn’t let him sign out. She told him he’d missed too much of the second semester already and needed to be here at least one day. How the day dragged.

Anoela and Jenna had stayed home for two days. Anoela had returned to her sanctuary of covers, leaving Jenna alone on the couch. Again. However, under the circumstances, Jenna couldn’t bring herself to be angry with her. She spent those days sleeping and trying her hand at making pancakes. Epic fail. I won’t be trying that again. I hope sis doesn’t notice all the wet spots on the ceiling. Jenna thought as the doorbell rang insistently.

She opened the door to find Russ bent over panting. Jenna felt her nostril’s flare. Maybe it was time to take Russ down the way she had Jordan. Russ finally caught his breath and looked up.

“What do you want?” Jenna asked angrily. “Let me guess...hmm… to see my sister. Not a chance. This is all your fault.” She added hatefully.
“Please…” Russ started. Jenna rolled her eyes as she slammed the door in his face. Russ knocked on the door and finished. “Please…tell Anoela ‘Happy Birthday’.” When the door didn’t open again he turned and walked back home, carrying with him his heavy heart.
Russ went into his own home and sat down at the kitchen table. He couldn’t remember ever feeling so lonely and miserable. Probably because Anoela was always there to comfort and care for me, he thought. He laid his head on the table as his mother came in.
“Russ…sweetie, you ok? Is your head hurting?” His mother asked worriedly.
“I’m fine mom.” Russ answered flatly.
“Don’t you fine me, I’ll pop you boy.” She said playfully.
Russ lifted his head and watched his mother dance around the kitchen, making dinner. She looked so happy, oblivious in a way.
“Don’t you have an appointment with Dr. Jennings?” Ashleigh asked absentmindedly.
Russ groaned. “Yes…do I have to go?”
“Yes.” His mother stated promptly.
Russ grumbled as he collected his keys and wallet. He headed toward the door as he heard his mother say, “Maybe he can give you some advice”

Russ drove across town to the hospital. Dr. Jennings was sitting outside on the sidewalk when he pulled up. Russ got out and sat down beside him.

Dr. Jennings smiled at him and said, “I didn’t think you were coming.” When Russ didn’t respond he continued, “You don’t like talking to me.”

Russ sighed. “That’s not it. I just have a lot going on….” He trailed off.

“You probably think I won’t understand or I’ll give you some lame advice. I’m not like that. I find letting someone talk and allow them to deduce their own answer is the best and most helpful advice because, often enough you know the answer. Deep down,” he told Russ softly.

After a few moments of silence Russ spilled out the entire story. From when he woke up in the hospital to Jenna slamming the door in his face. Once he’d finished he buried his head in his hands.

“I don’t know what to do…I don’t know how to fix any of this!” Russ sobbed.

Dr. Jennings sat there nodding, and then he finally spoke. “Let me ask you something. What is the first thing that pops into your head when you think of Jordan? What pops into your head when you think of Anoela?”

Russ sighed, “When I think of Jordan…I think of drama,” he paused and added, “but when I think of Anoela I think of…its magic.”
Suddenly, Dr. Jennings cell phone began beeping. He answered and talked in a low hushed voice. When he hung up he turned to Russ.

“I have to go up to the ER. Drunk driving accident involving mother and her kids.” He got up and started heading toward the door, then he turned and added. “Perhaps it’s time you go and visit your truck. You might very well find your answer there.” Then Dr. Jennings disappeared through the revolving doors of the hospital.

Russ climbed back in the car and sat there. He’d wanted to go and see his car for awhile but he hadn’t had the time or the guts to go and see it. He pulled out his cell and called his dad, who told him the truck was at a friend of the family’s junkyard. Christian asked Russ if he wanted him to go with him. Russ declined saying that it was probably better if he did it on his own.

Russ pulled up to the rusted gates of the junkyard about twenty minutes later. Mr. Higgs, the owner, let him through the gate and began walking Russ through the sea of car husks. Russ looked to the left and to the right. Cars stacked up to the sky. Some looked ancient and appeared to belong here, in their final resting place. Others looked wrecked and broken, like they’d been forced to come here and rot. Every foot step Russ took felt heavier than the last. Finally they reached the very back of the junkyard.

Mr. Higgs pointed down the row. “Ya car’s at the end of this here row. Might take ya a minute to recognize her. Ya gave her a prutty good beatin.” With that he spat, turned around and headed back to his house.

Russ walked down the row giving each car a once over, wondering what the story was behind each one. After passing about ten cars he came to a red, black, and silver heap. It was his old Silverado truck. A wave of nausea and sadness washed over him. Russ walked around it. The front was completely crushed in and spattered with dried brown blood. The top was dented slightly, and the driver’s door was missing. Russ slid into to the driver’s seat. Broken glass crunched underneath him. He sat there lost in thought. This is the last thing I saw. He placed his hands on the warped steering wheel. Russ cast a glance down at his scared arms. Dozens of crescent scars dotted his arms. He reached up and grabbed the dangling review mirror, looking through the cracked glass. The boy inside looked just as broken and lost as he felt. Then reached up and flipped his sun visor down.

He was showered with glass. Russ swore as he dusted himself off. Then a piece of paper caught his eye. He pulled it out from the sun visor’s mirror. It was a picture of Anoela. She was in a beautiful emerald green sun dress. The edges of the picture were a little tattered and torn, other than that it was in good condition. Russ clutched it to him as Dr. Jennings’s words rushed back to him ‘…what pops into your mind?’ Anoela’s beautiful and caring face immediately appeared.

If Jordan had ever cared about me she would have been there, with Anoela, to help. She never even showed. She was probably off fooling around with some other girl’s boyfriend. Whatever was between Jordan and me was stupid. I was stupid for ever thinking of anyone but Anoela. Russ’s mind raced. Russ jumped out of the truck, racing through the junkyard back to the SUV, he waved goodbye to Mr. Higgs and sped home. He needed to talk to Anoela.

On the way home Russ called Jordan.

“Well, hello,” Jordan purred.

“Leave Anoela the hell alone. Stop with the petty rumors and grow up. I bet the only reason you started that crap was because you got your butt handed to you by Jenna” Russ yelled into the phone.

Jordan’s honey voice soured as she replied, “Feeling guilty and yelling doesn’t change what happened.”

Russ calmed, as he replied. “Yea…you’re right, but I can change it now. So, like I said, leave Anoela alone.” Before Jordan could reply, he hung up his phone and flung it into the passenger seat.

Russ yanked the SUV into the Gogan’s drive and leaped from it, rushing to the door. Taking the front steps in a single leap he landed in front of the door and began repeatedly punching the door bell. After a few minutes an exasperated Jenna flung open the door.

Her eyes narrowed as she growled, “Can you not take a hint?”

“I’m not leaving until I get to speak with Anoela,” Russ growled his reply.

Suddenly Anoela appeared at the top of the stairs looking startled. She came down and gently moved Jenna out of the way. She stepped out on the front porch and closed the door firmly behind her. Russ was taken aback as he looked into her eyes; for the first time, he saw a glistening flame of anger behind them.

“What do you want Russ?” Anoela said icily.

“First of all…Happy 18th Birthday!” Russ began. Anoela did not look amused. He continued anyway. “Second…I’m sorry about Jordan spreading all those stupid rumors. I didn’t know she’d even done it. I was sick. I’ve tried texting you, but I guess you or your sister blocked me because none of them go through. I’m sorry I hurt you. I have no idea what I was thinking, but if I could go back I’d beat the crap out of myself. Obviously, I was out of mind to turn to Jordan for anything! I know you’re sad and upset, and you have every right to be…just don’t give up on me. You’ve always been there for me, even when we were little kids, now it’s my time to be there for you. Please. Let me have it. Yell. Scream. Beat me with a book like your sister did.” Russ finished breathlessly.

Anoela sat down in the hammock. She pulled out her cell phone.

“There’s something I want you to hear.” Anoela hedged. Russ nodded. She put her phone on speaker and a voicemail began to play.

“This relationship is going nowhere. Honestly, I don’t even know why we started dating to begin with. I have never really even been attracted to you. Listen, we have been friends since we were toddlers and we can still…what am I saying? I don’t even wanna be friends. I need something more. Maybe this would have worked out if we weren’t so close. Well…see ya. Goodbye, Anoela,”

Russ sat down beside her as she replayed the voicemail again. It was his voice. Tears began falling down Anoela’s cheeks.

“You left this voicemail the day of your accident. You know all the times you tried to kiss and cuddle me and I would pull away. I pulled away…just in case you didn’t love me anymore. I was scared that if I let you love on me or took advantage of the fact you’d lost your memory…that if you ever remembered…you’d hate me for it.” Anoela cried softly.

Russ leaned over and hugged her tightly. “No matter what you do…I could never hate you. You were always there for me…but thank you for thinking that. It was very noble of you.” He paused. “I can tell you now I don’t think I ever stopped loving you. I think I just got a little lost.” He chuckled.

Anoela busted out into a fresh wave of sobs. “I’m…sorry if I did something…wrooong” She wailed. Russ laughed and held her close.

“You could never do me any wrong Anoela. I’m the one who messed up…” He pulled away and made her face him as he continued. “…I promise you though, I’m gonna spend the rest of my life making it up to you….If you’ll let me.”

Anoela laughed and nodded. Russ kissed her forehead gently. Russ looked up to see Jenna peeking through the door. He smiled at her and winked playfully and she slammed the door. Russ told Anoela it was getting cold and she should head inside before she caught the flu. Before she got to the door, Russ pulled her back and got down on one knee.

“I know it’s early but will you go to prom with me?” Russ asked sheepishly. Anoela smiled, kissed his cheek, murmuring a soft yes and went inside.

Two months later winter had thawed and given way to a light and warm early spring. It was a Saturday. Russ was at the arcade with Mason and Tyler. Anoela and Jenna were heading out to go prom dress shopping. Anoela was nervous.

“What if I’m too fat for the dress I want? What if Russ hates it? What if I can’t find a dress?” Anoela whined in the Jeep.

Jenna rolled her eyes as her sister continued to fret down the road. The past two months had been the easiest months since June. Jordan’s rumors had faded with the flare of new and more interesting rumors. Russ babied Anoela every chance he could, spoiling her with special jewelry, candies, and cards. He’d taken both Jenna and Anoela on so many movie nights Jenna was actually getting sick of the theater. Now, prom was two weeks away, and their mother had finally wired the extra money needed for a dress.

The air inside the mall was electric. Jenna could feel the vibes off the dress hungry girls, even her sister. They found the nearest formal dress store and entered. Anoela rounded up a dozen different dresses and pushed Jenna into a large dressing room.

The first dress was a short, loud purple dress. Jenna giggled; her sister looked like a giant fluffy plum. It was immediately tossed to the side. The next dress was a gold stripper looking dress. The zipper never even made it up. The next ten dresses were too short, too revealing, or just too trashy. Each deemed unworthy of prom night.

The girls traveled from formal dress store to formal dress store. Jenna could see discouragement on Anoela’s face. The day only got worse as they entered the final dress shop. There trying on the most drop dead gorgeous emerald green mermaid dress was Jordan. She smirked at Anoela and Jenna as she hopped down off the fitting pedestal.

“What are you doing here?” Jordan asked snottily.

Jenna side stepped between Anoela and Jordan like a guard dog and replied, just as snottily, “None of your business, tramp.”

Jordan glared at her. “Let me guess Russ is taking your pathetic self to the prom. My boyfriend, who is the football quarterback, is escorting me”

Anoela and Jenna ignored her as they stepped around her to get to the dresses. Jordan got in front of them again.

“I hope you don’t think you’re going to purchase a dress here. I bet even the clearance dresses are far too expensive for the likes of you,” Jordan emphasized. Jenna was ready to blow a fuse when Anoela moved her aside.

“I want to ask you something. Why do you have to be so trashy and selfish?” Anoela asked curiously. “You constantly act like you’re better than everyone else…when you’re one of the worst people I have ever met. You think you’re bringing people down when you run your mouth like that, but in reality, you’re only making yourself look really bad.” She added matter-of-factly. Jenna busted out laughing. Jordan turned bright red, and in her green dress looked similar to that of a Christmas tree.

Jenna slapped her sister on the back and leapt up into the air, shouting at Jordan. “Take that skank!” Anoela grew red, as a crowd had formed to watch, and rushed her sister into a dressing room.

Anoela sighed and leaned up against the door. “I give up Jenna. I don’t think there is a perfect prom dress out there for me.”

Jenna smiled and declared. “I’ll go pick out the next dress.” Anoela began to protest, but Jenna had already vanished from the room. A few moments later Jenna returned. When Anoela opened the door she gasped.

Jenna held in her hands a simple fitted black floor length halter-topped dress. Jenna grinned from ear to ear at seeing the excitement on Anoela’s face and deep down she was pretty sure they’d just found her dress. It fit perfectly, and due to a small tear at the bottom hem, it was on sale for twenty dollars. The budget had been, at most, a hundred. Jenna and Anoela snatched up the dress and then went out for lunch to celebrate.

The next two weeks flew by and soon it was the day of the prom. Jenna did Anoela’s long auburn hair in a stylish fountain up do, placing little fake diamonds and silver roses throughout her hair. Around six Russ rang the doorbell. Jenna was blinded by the flash of Mr. and Mrs. Henson’s cameras. While Jenna was trying to recover her sight Russ pushed her to the side as he caught a glimpse of Anoela.

Oh. My. God, Russ thought, watching Anoela descend the stairs. Beautiful didn’t even begin to describe how she looked. Anoela had on a black dress and her hair was up in diamonds, curls, and roses. While Russ was awestruck by Anoela’s appearance, Jenna was checking out the tux Russ had picked out. He’d done a pretty good job on his own, picking out a black and silver tux with old Converse sneakers.
For the next hour the Henson’s took pictures everywhere. Jenna finally had to remind them that they’d be late if they didn’t leave. Russ and Anoela cast Jenna an appreciative smile, and they climbed into the Henson’s SUV. They arrived at Marco High School about twenty minutes after the prom had started. The theme of the prom was The Titanic: Our Hearts Go On. The art club had created an awesome replica of a large boat’s bow, where everyone’s prom pictures were taken.
The entire night was perfect. Russ and Anoela danced to almost every song. The evening got even better when the prom queen and king were announced. The king was Jordan’s quarterback boyfriend. The queen was some preppy junior cheerleader. Not Jordan. She ended up storming out but no one seemed to mind. When the DJ called it a night Russ and Anoela went home. Both were too excited to go to bed so they ended up staying in the hammock all night, talking.
“Thank you, Anoela.” Russ said, for the millionth time.
“For what?” Anoela responded routinely.
“For staying. For believing in me. For loving me.” Russ spoke.
“Russ, you don’t have to keep thanking me. I’ve told you a million times I’m always going to try to be here for you.” Anoela lectured accordingly.
Russ smiled. “I know…I just feel like I owe you so much.”
Anoela sighed. She rolled over and pointed to the morning turning sky and said, “Look, even after all this time, the sun never says to the earth, ‘You owe me.’ Look what happens with a love like that. It lights the whole sky.” Russ smiled and kissed her on the cheek as they rocked off to sleep in the hammock.



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