I stand here before me, the grave of the one i love. My tears hit the snow, melting it as if it was drops of fire. I lose my breath thinking about her smile. And how much she meant to me. I could remember it as if it was yesterday. Everything. Every specific detail..The trees, the birds, the church. The snow falls hard on me as i look down and read the tombstone. Over and over, it reads.."My last words to the world is that i want the person that means most to me to be happy, even if I'm gone, even if I'm dead". She wrote that when she was in 7th grade, I could still remember her asking me if that's okay for her poem. I could feel the tears coming down my cheek. The coldness surrounds me...i feel nothing but pain..1

I walk downstairs. My eyes red..my heart broken. I look outside an see that its still nightime, i have to go to sleep for school in the morning i thought to myself. As i walk back up the stairs, my heartbeat went faster and faster. I passed out on the ground..2

I don't know where i am now..i look around, but see nothing but plains of land. I close my eyes and here her voice.I feel my body shaking. It hurts to know that shes really gone, that i never really got to know her. I open my eyes and see that I'm on some sort of tracks, i hear a train coming. I try to run by i can't. I scream really loud, but realizing that i did that before in one of my dreams, i close my eyes. Thinking about something else. I couldn't so i just stood there waiting..Then all of a sudden i wake up screaming as loud as i can. I see that my mom was next to me checking if i was okay..3

That morning i woke up and realized that i didn't have a bad dream the second time i fell asleep. I was happy until i got to school and saw the school paper. My heart sank and my tears droped. The headline to the paper was "Girl killed while sleeping, parents think it was a heart attack". I droped the paper and walked away...4

Later that week i spent my days writing . I didn't know what to do with my life anymore, i just wanted to go away forever. The pain of her smile still haunts me. I tried to think about something else but couldn't, it hurts. I took a quick nap after i was finished writing..As i close my eyes i see that I'm on a train, going full speed. The trains lights flicker as i got up. I realized that this isn't a good dream..wait my dreams are never good. I look around to see that the train was vacant, not a soul in site. I open up the door to the next rows of seats. I still don't see anybody, but as i walk to the front of the train i hear an eerie moaning coming from the front seat, as i walk to the front of the train, i could feel my spine chilling up. The eerie moaning gets louder and louder. I walk to the front off the train. Its dark out and i see nothing but trees and the front tracks. I hear it again..the eerie moaning. I look to the front seat and a head turns around without its body moving, saying in an eerie voice goodbye, then the trains hits a building of some sorts. 5

I wake up screaming, my heart racing faster then anything. I can see nothing but darkness. Its still snowing outside, but this time the snow fell in a weird way. It sounded like it was snowing to my pulse. I lay back down and breath slowly, calming down my heart beat..6

I knew my life wouldn't be the same. So i went into my dads room and got something. I walked 15 miles to a graveyard. I looked at my phone it was 5:39 in the morning, i knew it was to early, but i couldn't sleep. The graveyard looks eerie at night, butt it doesn't matter.The only thing that matters anymore is her..7

I read her tombstone over and over again, i feel nothing but pain. My body is like shattered glass that can't be fixed. I look at the ground, my tears made holes..I realized that i couldn't take this pain anymore. So i put my dads gun to my head and pulled the trigger. My last words from my letter was that I want the person that meant most to me to be happy,even if I'm gone, even if I'm dead..

I open up my eyes and look around, Am i in heaven? I feel a sudden rush of happiness in my body..I guess i am, i feel so happy. I can finnaly be with the love of my life. After everything i've been trough, im happy. I stand up, relizing this isnt heaven, and that its really cold out.Im confused on where i am. I take my first couple of steps relizing that im light as air. I close my eyes for a couple minutes. I think of what ive been through, everything..Losing her and killing her. I open them, and i see nothing. I focus my eyes to see that theres a cileing and a fan hanging above me..



Im alive..I could hear my breathe, i could still feel my heart.It was all just a dream..I guess i didnt kill her after all. Now im really happy, as i open up my broken down door, i relize that i can hear her voice comming from the downstairs kitchen. I walk down the stairs slowly. I enter the living room, nobody in sight. Then i see it...a ghostly figure runs across my eyes. My spine chills up, my heart races..I walk slowly into the kitchen. My vision becoming foggy. I breath out slowly, only to see that i can see my breate. I look around and see nothing but kitchen equipments.. then the storage room lights turned on..



I walk to the storage room, I seee nothing but a white light. The light dims as i see that im in school. I walk around and see everyone in there normal self. Then one of my friends walked up to me asking if i was going to the dance..I didnt know how to reply so i just nodded my head and laugh.Its like i cant talk, my mouth was like stapled together. I walk to my first class and see that the teacher has wrote somthing very strange on the board..It was the riddle to one of my first dreams. The teacher asked everyone to solve it, but no one answers. It was strange. I walked out of the classroom before the bell rung..What was i suppose to do.This wasnt a dream, i couldnt just wake up and be safe. I had to get out, fast. As i ran to the door, i see Azzura. She smiled at me again, everything in my body stops. I tried to get out but i can't. So i just closed my eyes for a couple seconds..Shes gone, everybody gones.I wake up on the kitchen floor.Was that a dream, i asked myself quietly in the dark.



That morning i walked to school. Now the real test begins. I looked at the school paper. Nothing about Azzura. My face smiled with so much joy. As i walk to my lockers my friend ran up to me again, but this time it was real. He asked me if i was going to the dance. I had to say yes since azzura was alive. He walked away talking to himself, it was weird. Everything was weird.As i enter the hall i saw Azzura, she was happy and smiling, it was like seeing heaven. The my heart sank as i saw he boyfriend walking up to her and hugging her. I walked away into my first period classroom. My english teacher explained to us a project we had to do. I didnt acctually pay attention, i just listen to him as i read my book in slince.



As i walk home i see Azzura still hanign with her boyfriend, i feel nothing but emptiness. I wanted to just turn away but it was like my body wanted to torture me. This was worst then getting hit by a train or dieing in a car. Reality hurts..As i got home, i put my bookbag down and got a drink. Then as soon as i got a cup, my bookbag fell and the engish project paper from my teacher fell out. I read it in slince. The words that caught my eyes the most were "Write a story about an exciting experience you had with life"..



I took my pen and a lot of loose-leaf paper and wrote down for the title, losing the love of my life. The beggiining went like As i lay down on the hard shallow ground, i could hear the footsteps of them as they walk away. Blood lay warm on the ground, i try to get up but im to weak. I lay back down unsteady and broken. But before all of that happened, let me just take you to the beginning...



My tears fell downs i wrote the ending of the paper, His love is all she knows, and it was only just a dream...

As i handed in my paper to my teacher, i asked to go to the bathroom..Later that day 2 teachers found a boy hung on a bathroom stall, with the carving His love is all she knows, it was only a dream..

I look up. Staring at the stars..watching as the dark empty clouds float above me. The light cool breeze and the smell of summer filled the air. I started to think about the stars. All of a sudden I started to hear the sound of something making a crash noise and the sound of silence. . .1

My eyes covered in white lights. The lights dim down as i start to see the shadows of the room. Silence echo the room, not a sound in the room. I realize where i am now and i try and get up but i couldn't. It was like being tied down with chains. What was next for me? I just sat there and waited.2

I lay down on the hard cold ground. The rocks sinking into my spine. I started to hear noise and the vibration caused by the trains. This was a game of death. A game were no one wins. No one lives.. Cars driving over me, going faster and faster. The smell of gasoline filled my lungs. I closed my eyes and block out the sound of the cars. My eyes felt as if it was being flooded. I open them. The world is frozen. I couldn't believe it.3

I tried to get back up but couldn't the cars were going by to fast. Then i thought to myself what was the point in getting up if my life was so bad. I started to look up the sky. My heart racing faster and faster as cars almost drive over me. I laid flat on the ground. Then i started to think more of it. Almost 2 months ago. The last day of school. Her smile. My dreams. Why was this so difficult to get out of my head. I started to realize the pain my body has been going through. And even though my dreams have stopped I still dream about her.4

Then out of no where my heart stopped . 5

I open my eyes and see that I'm on this plane. I look out the window seeing nothing but the darkness outside. It was my dreams again. I felt as if i didn't want to wake up this time. My dreams were better then reality. I took in a deep breath and got up. Looking around the plane. Then all of a sudden the plain felt as if it hit something. "Why does my dreams always have to be weird" I thought to myself.6

The plane was dead silence, i checked each seat to see if there is anybody on the plane. I started to hear noises and laughter. It was coming from the front of the plane. So i walked as fast as i could to the front of the plane. To see nothing. Then the cockpit doors open, revealing Azurra. She didn't look very happy. She looked..sad. Her eyes red and the sound of her voice sounded as if she was depressed over something. I couldn't stand to see her sad, so i walked over to her and gave her a hug. All of a sudden she disappears. And the plane starts to tilt down. I open the cockpit door and my hear sank. It was me. Hanging myself. Is that why she was so sad? Then i hear Azzura screaming. I turn around and see that she was being picked up by her boyfriend. She was being thrown out the side of the plane. She was screaming and crying. Why was all this happening. The plane hit the ground with full force, exploding and killing everyone.7

I wake up, seeing that I'm still alive..Cops and ambulance surrounded me. The cars stop. I got back up and wiped the dirt of my back. I started to realize how life is when you realize that the person you love. Loves you back. 8

The sound of crashing and exploding wont get out of my head. I was back in reality, where anything could happen to me. Anything. Then a white light covers my eyes as the sound of horns blaring filled my eardrum ears. I didn't know what happen. The light dims down. Then, i realize that a car was heading straight for me. I wouldn't run or dodge it. The car was going to fast. I close my eyes. Next thing i know..I'm gone..