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Don't Need Anyone

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Author's note: It's also humor or mystery, but it only allowed one tag:P
Enjoy. Don't let Renee get too crazy.
Author's note: It's also humor or mystery, but it only allowed one tag:P
Enjoy. Don't let Renee get too crazy.  « Hide author's note
Chapters:   1 2 3 4 Next »

Prologue

I stumbled out of the car, heels striking the street with a pronounced clack. I stood up, ignoring the fire shooting through my legs, and had started towards the front door when a hand caught my wrist, spinning me around. Devon glanced down at me, worried.

“Ren, are you sure you’re OK?” he asked. I cringed at the name.

“Please don’t call me that.” It came out in a whisper.

A puzzled expression crossed his face. “Why…?” He shook his head. “You didn’t answer my question.”

“Yes, Devon,” I replied tiredly. “I am A-OK. Now could I please get inside?”

He let go of my wrist slowly, dark eyes on mine as I stumbled back to the door, fiddled with the lock, and slid inside.

I’d never even said it was a semi-good date.

At least, good by my standards. He’d taken me to a nice movie, a nice dinner, picked me up and dropped me off in a nice car, and paid for it all.

But he just couldn’t stop fussing.

“Renee, do you need help here?” “Is this too high for you?” “Want me to carry that?” “Will your parents be alright with this?” These comments plagued me the whole night. Yes, I’m fine. No, I do not need your help. No, they won’t care any more than they care about the Mets. Which isn’t a whole lot.

And the sad thing was, he was better than most of them.

Sighing, I shucked my four inch high daggers into the corner and crawled up the stairs—literally. Hands on one step, feet three below, hands up, feet up. It was the quietest way to get to the bedroom without alerting my parents to my presence.

I, on the other hand, was completely aware of theirs.

“James!” I winced as the shriek dug into my tender ears. Someday soon they’d start bleeding “What the hell is wrong with you? You bought a three hundred dollar suit just for a business meeting!” I reached my room. Quickly, I entered and closed the door behind me. My elbow snapped completely straight as it slammed shut, and a red haze crossed my vision. I slowly slid to my butt, but the voices continued.

“Yeah, a business meeting! For my job! You know, the one that keeps this roof over our heads?”

I dragged myself over to the bed, and slung a leg over the top. The other followed and, with more than a little effort, I lifted my head and torso to the cushion. Thank G-d I have such a short bed. The screams hadn’t ended yet. I buried my head beneath the pillow, breathing in the faint smell of cookie dough. I love my air freshener.

I stayed there for minutes. After all, what was the point in getting up? Lena wouldn’t text me till morning, and I didn’t have anything else to do.

My elbow begged to differ.

The initial shock of straightening it had worn off, but the dull ache I was forced to greet every night had returned. It grew, bit by bit, until I couldn’t ignore it anymore.

Cursing, I hopped out of my bed as if it were still two feet high. As I landed, my knees protested much more strongly than they had before. Dammit, at this rate I was going to be a grandma at sixteen.

I hobbled to the little station I’d erected in my room years ago. A small, chilled bucket stuffed with ice and box upon box of zipline bags. These bags of ice were my best friends every night.

Quickly scooping up and dumping ice into the bags, my fingers starting to go numb, I made decent time. About a minute later I was back in bed, one bag at the right elbow, one on each knee.

I glanced down at myself in satisfaction. See? I thought, towards Devon and all of the rest of them. I can handle myself. I don’t need anyone.

I could only hope someday they believed it. Because at the moment, none of them did.

Not even me.
Chapters:   1 2 3 4 Next »


Join the Discussion

This book has 113 comments. Post your own now!

Just.A.Dream said...
Feb. 18, 2011 at 4:50 pm

I know that you have had a TON of feedback on Inkpop. And they did such a good job with the feedback I really don't have any criticism. :o

My only question is: people date that much at thirteen now? To me, this story sounds like it'd be from someone older than a thirteen year old, but that's just me.

I think I'm going to finish reading this on Inkpop because it was amazing. :)

You definitely need to send some queries about publishing because it was amazing. I'd definitely... (more »)

 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 18, 2011 at 6:54 pm

Hehe thank you Angie! =D

 

....thirteen? o_O

 

I think you're thinking of I'm Just Thirteen. ;D That's a different book.  Renee is 16.

 
Just.A.Dream replied...
Feb. 18, 2011 at 7:28 pm
OH WAIT, I got that from the flashback. :o Whoops, haha. I knew I read something about her being 13 in this story. :P
 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 19, 2011 at 2:01 pm
Ah, yes, that would be why. XD
 
reading_under_h2o said...
Feb. 12, 2011 at 12:15 pm
This is a really goood book, are you going to continue writing?
 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 13, 2011 at 1:03 pm
Thanks! =) If you mean continue writing the book, I've already finished it. =D
 
charmiypiggy said...
Feb. 11, 2011 at 5:58 am
Wow. I really loved this! I've read over some of the other comments, and pretty mch anything I say will be a repeat of someone else's. So I just wanna say that this is awesome, and I would love to read more. Excellent writing!
 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 13, 2011 at 1:01 pm
Thank you! =) 
 
Azrael said...
Feb. 4, 2011 at 9:08 pm
 Our time is running out, its not from Uprising by Muse but its a line in a song called Time IS Running Out by Muse......
 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 5, 2011 at 11:24 pm
-headdesk- I found out a couple weeks ago--yeah, sorry about that. =P I don't want to edit the chapter 'cause that would take this down for a few weeks.
 
-DreamForever- replied...
May 21, 2011 at 4:01 pm
I got super excited when I read "headdesk." Fellow nerdfighter?
 
Elizabeth_DayThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 3, 2011 at 6:31 pm
I really REALLY like this.  The voice is fantastic!  A lot of the time, when I read novels on teen ink, it feels like I have to really push past the first few chapters.  It wasn't like that with your story at all.  I was in Renee's head, saw what she saw, felt what she felt.  Great job!  My only concern is that most of your paragraphs are only one or two sentences, which barely qualifies them as paragraphs.  PLEASE post more.  I'm totally into this st... (more »)
 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 4, 2011 at 10:05 am

Thank you! =D I'm glad you like it. I probably won't post more until they disable copy & paste, but the whole thing is posted on inkpop. =)

 

And I will definitely try to check that out. =D

 
Annerdy said...
Jan. 26, 2011 at 4:55 pm

I read beyond the first chapter because that's what thorough critiquing is all about. And heck, it was just THAT good. (: I liked the voices you gave each character so they were witty, humorous and memorable. There was never a boring patch anywhere so the storyline flowed very easily. The writing was definitely fantastic because it was almost like a movie was playing in my head. (: If this was published, I would probably purchase this novel in a heartbeat. The way you incorporated humor, pain... (more »)

 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jan. 26, 2011 at 6:55 pm

Haha thank you so much! XD

 

I intend to keep writing! D= -runs away from pitchforks- 

 

And yes, I just realized that irony. xD

 
rainbowwaffles said...
Jan. 25, 2011 at 3:06 pm

I really liked the first two chapters, but i have a pet peeve of reading when dialogue isn't on separate lines. :( Sorry, I know it's not your fault, just some formatting issue. I'll definitely get around to reading it, though, I want to know what happens next. :D I've seen some of your comments on other people's novels and you seem very helpful. If it's not too much to ask for, (you must be tired of hearing this...) but could you maybe check out mine? It's called The Formation. It's i... (more »)

 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jan. 25, 2011 at 8:05 pm
Thank you for the comment. =) Don't worry, I have the same pet peeve.  And like I said with lovelycheese, I will certainly try.  I have a busy schedule. =P
 
Timekeeper This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 24, 2011 at 8:34 pm

I really enjoyed your work--the characters are memorable, unique, and like many have said here, realistic. I think that's one of the things that can make or break a reader's interest, and it's safe to say you pulled it off.

The humor is top notch without being over the top, and it definitely provided a fuel that kept the story moving.

I'll have to check out the rest on InkPop!

 

 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jan. 25, 2011 at 6:51 am

=D Thank you for the comment, Timekeeper.  I'm glad you liked it.

 

I'll try to comment on SuperNOVA when possible. :)

 
lovelycheese said...
Jan. 22, 2011 at 11:07 pm

I really, really like this novel - it's most definitely one of the best on the site. Your descriptions are really great, and the characters are so realistic. I'm going to read the rest on inkpop(:

And... I hear you give some pretty awesome feedback. So, would you mind reading my novel Celestial? It's on the Sci-Fi/Fantasy section. Thanks(:

 
OfficialApprover This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Jan. 25, 2011 at 6:50 am
Thank you for the comment. =)  I will definitely try to comment on that--my time is limited, but I'll get to it as soon as possible.
 

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