Nothing hurt more than the pain and agony she put me through. She never wanted me, she lead me on and made me think as if she wanted me in her life forever, she was a liar, she lied. That was the worst pain, not even the needle that seeped the poison into my skin. It gave me an appeased feeling, took all of the pain that I had bottled up inside of me from the love she gave me.
I created a world for myself where she was everywhere so I would never miss her. I remind myself of the arguments we went through where I would give anything to never see her again, and now that I literally can never see her again, looking into her eyes is all I want. Anyways, I created a world where everything I seen had her in it. I hated the color yellow and yet now when I see a dandelion or the sunshine, she pops into my head. That's what she's good at, popping into my head.