Looking Through the Muddy Window

November 11, 2011
By Nearly_Confused SILVER, Jacksonville, Florida
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Nearly_Confused SILVER, Jacksonville, Florida
7 articles 4 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
When I was a child, I thought as a child, I spoke as a child; But when I became a man learned to put away all my childish things - 1 Corinthians 14:11


Mars, 10 200+8

Hey spider scope: only normal girls get excited about dances, but I’m not normal. It’s as if the stork forgot, I’m the Adams family child (or so I like to think). But instead I’m put with Mr. and Mrs. Smiley, they are always happy, what’s their problem? My family’s like the Brady Bunch. I don’t even know all of my brother and sisters names. The only one I like is John; he hates the brat pack as much as I do. I swear my family’s related to Stan, Jan and the rest of those similes. Thank goodness we’re not in the 70’s, then my life would be a living hell. The worst thing, yet, which is right in the middle of my fire pit called life, is my school dance. It’s coming up and eeverywhere you go some gigglebot of a girl is talking about her date or what she’s going to wear, or would didn’t ask her out. Well I got a couple of asks to the dance myself, but what do these losers know about me? All they know is that I’m some black-haired Goth.

My best friend Victoria is set on getting the school’s biggest nerd, Roger, to ask her out. Quite frankly I say good luck and besides she’s going to be heart broken when she finds out that he’s going to be home studying on the night of the dance. I know because I asked him in World History when he came in the back to sharpen his pencils. It was so funny because when I tugged on his plaid dress shirt, he looked at me as if I was a mugger and I was going to rob him. I think she might even turn smart/nerdy (whichever) for him. What’s up with this being love thing anyway? I mean is it a disease that everyone can catch? When I was younger I thought the way you fell in love was if cupid showed up and you pay him a buck fifty to shoot a stupid arrow at some person, then BAM! you fall in love. Sounds simple when you write it down on paper, right? We all know that it’s one thing to say something and another thing to do it. Anyway I got to leave Mr. and Mrs. Smiley, other wise known as Mom and Dad, are calling me down to dinner (Probably poison).

Mars, 11 200+8

Oh my gosh I just want to scream its 5:30 in the morning and they’re playing Taylor Swift on the radio. I almost had half a nervetothrow my clock out the window, but aren’t you glad I didn’t. So after school Vicky (my nickname for her, which is also short for Victoria) showed up talking about the dance. ‘’Felice, guess what I have a full proof plan on how to get Roger!‘’ ‘’If you say one more thing about the dance, Roger will definitely notice you.‘’ I say slinging my arm around her neck and pretending to choke her. Once we got home I found my mom baking cookies. I tried to steal some cookies while they were piping hot, but my mom hit me with her spoon and said in her June Cleveland voice, ’’No, no, those are for little Peter’s class.’’ Disgusted, Vicky and I went upstairs into my room.

We started our homework, it was more like Vicky did her homework and I cheated off of her when she wasn't looking. I thought about what I said that morning to her about Roger and that’s when I thought about how everyone would pity her if I attempted to kill her just because she’s so beautiful. The thing about Vicky is that she’s pretty and even if I tried to kill her, she’d still come out the victor. She has big brown eyes, long amber-hazel hair and is shaped like a Brat’s doll. While I’m shaped like a dumb coke bottle with long black hair and small brown eyes. The most unfair thing is that I belong to the itty-bitty tiny winy club while Vicky is often considered normal in the boob department. As Vicky was saying something about turning herself into a nerd for Roger, WAIT!! ‘’Hold the phone!’’ I yelled ‘’Y-y-your doing WHAT!?’’ I spitted out. ‘’Oh I’m sorry I thought you heard me’.’ said Vicky in a calm tone. A CALM tone how can she be so calm! ‘’Well, I was going to turn nerd for Roger, see I wrote out my plan -’’ (I cut her off). ‘’VICKY! You can‘t just leave me alone!’’ I whined. ‘’Oh, I‘m not, where did you get that impression? Ben Penerster wanted to know if he could take you to the dance.’’ BEN, the school‘s jock, wants to take me to the dance? (this has to be the worst day ever). ‘’Don’t be such a sour puss; I think he‘s cute and I notice the way he looks at you……. he wants you BAD!’’ ‘’Well if he‘s so cute than you take him!‘’ I growled. ‘’And hurt Roger‘s feelings, NEVER!’’ ‘’Ok, I’m going to say this slowly, Roger never had, will, or is going to have feelings for you!’’ I said as if Vicky was mentally retarded. (That was a little harsh) I thought to myself, but before I could apologize Vicky ran out my room sobbing.

I sighed, One friend gone zero to get rid of. What did I just do? Vicky was my best friend and I just ruined our relationship. Knowing her, it would take a least a month to forgive me and by then the dance will only be 5 days away. Another sigh heavily feel out of me, I thought to myself, I‘m a loser. I got up to go talk to her, but when I stepped outside of my room, I heard John’s voice, and he had that kind of voice that he uses when he’s trying to figure out about something important. ‘’What happened?‘’ He said in a soft low voice that I almost couldn’t hear. ‘’She and I were in her room and I was telling about my plan to…….‘’I heard heavy crying, then I couldn’t even hear anythingng else they said ,but after a while I didn’t even hear murmurings. It was as if they weren’t even talking anymore.

Backing into my room, I stepped on a piece of paper. Picking it up and smelling it, I could tell it wasn't mine because my papers aren‘t scented, VICKY! It was her plan to get Roger. Flopping into my chair, I read her plan. First she was going to change her schedule so that she could be in Roger’s classes; all but two so he wouldn‘t get suspicious. Then she’d make sure that they’d become lab partners and find out what he likes, his interest and every thing about him. At the end she‘ll turn into his dream girl. I havetogive her props, it‘s pretty full proof! Wait! is that why Ben seems to be eeverywhere I am? EWWWWWWWW!!!!!! Ben Penerster is trying to be my dream guy. EWWWWWWW!!!! At that moment my brother John walks in. ‘’Hey, I saw Vicky in the hall and stopped her, and we talked. You of all people I would have never expected to say something so mean (but true) to your best friend.’’ he said crossly. ‘’I only said it because she was trying to put me with Ben.’’ I said angrily. ‘’Wait? Ben, Ben Penerster? You and Ben? Ha!’’ snorted, John. ‘’Well Ben, I mean Ashley, wait, Vicky is sitting out there for you, Ha, Ben what a loser!’’ John laughed closing the door. I threw my head into a pillow and screamed.

As I walked into the kitchen, I saw Vicky sitting there, her eyes blood red eating my mom‘s homemade cookies. ‘’Felice don‘t talk to me.’’ she said sharply turning her head, sniffling. ‘’I swear sometimes Vicky, you‘re like the only person I trust and you break down the first time I talk to you.’’ I said turning my back to her. ‘’W-w-well you-you You made fun of me when I needed your help, I thought you of all people, You the one I trusted, You Felicity H. Bradley would understand, but then I guess you‘re just another failure right?’’ (That hurt). ‘’Vicky I-I-I‘ll try for you.’’ I said biting my lip. ‘’Y-Y-You will?’’ said Vicky looking up all teary eyed. ‘’Yeah.’’ I said looking down at my shoes. ‘’OH! I love you!‘’ screamed Vicky as she jumped from the table to hug and squeeze me. ‘’Know if you really loved me, then you’d let me have one of those delicious chocolate chip cookies.’’ I drooled while looking over her shoulder. ‘’Anything for a friend.’’ Vicky grinned as she handed me a cookie and we slid into my kitchen booth.

Mars, 18 200+8

Hey, Sorry I haven’t written, I’ve been busy hanging out with Vicky. She’s even persuaded me (God knows how) to buy a dress for the dance. We’ll go shopping in week. Well in a couple of minutes, I’m going to be forced to take a ‘’family photo’’, I bet you can imagine how that’s going to go. Later! (Wish me the best)

OMG!!!!! I hate ‘’family photos’’. I walked downstairs just to see my five year old brother, Pete running around in his Sunday clothes (if he ever used them). Once my twelve year old sister Anna finishes mopping the floor, Pete decides he wants to finish eating his ice- cream just to slip and fall only to be caught by my dad, who was smiling (highly irregular).Since I don't actually have the picture try to imagine it with me. So I’m standing on the far right with my hands behind my back . My older sister Anne is standing with her hands to her side. My brother John is the one with his hand making ‘’bunny ears’’ behind Anna’s head. Pete is the little child jumping in front of my mother and father, or as I like to call them, Mr. and Mrs. Smiley. When I showed it to Vicky she told me that I was being dramatic, but she can’t say anythingng because she’s an only child. Besides her photos always look like she walked out of a magazine. She even said we all looked pretty and handsome, but as she said handsome her eyes darted straight to John. (Strange thing is that my brother John, is considered the hottest guy at his school, but he’s just as socially award as me. It’s even been a couple of girl fights over him, for the stupidest things like who gets to sit next to him on the bus or who will be his biology partner.) Why can’t I have a family like Vicky‘s, or at least a photo like hers, maybe once in my life?
Mars, 21 200+8

Well, only god knows what I want to do today. I’m sitting on my rug writing in you while what looks like a thousand school books and miscellaneous papers are scattered eeverywhere. My Smiley loving mother told me it looked like a zoo cage in my bag. I know what zoo cage I’ld like to put her in! Math is my favorite subject, but if you let anyone read this, then I’ll rip your pages out, one by one. My poor math book is in a clutter with half of the pages either gone or falling out. The light blue notebook in my lap looks like it got into a fist fight with a pencil and a pen. Drawings crawl up and down the pages and assignments become less and less frequent as the year goes along. I kick my dreaded English/grammar book across the room so I don’t havetolook at it. Talk about the worst subject ever invented. I lean onto my backpack and something sharp hits me in my backside. ‘’OWWWWWW!’’ I scream.

Placing journalal down along with the weekday smack down book, I turn on my stomach. While searching through my book bag I could have sworn something bit at me. I found that old 2005 stick of gum that I was going to use as a gag, my beginning of the year schedule, a metal pipe (not sure where that came from), a piece of Roger’s tie that I cut off for Vicky (better give that to her), those animal crackers I stuffed into the bottom of my bag so Mr. Blue wouldn’t notice that I was eating, the lame book Vicky gave me entitled ‘You are Important’ like I every read that crap, and notes I passed for and to other people.

Then that’s when I saw it, a love note. Confused, I picked up the paper, it stuck to the inside of my gym shorts. Ew. Yanking it off I carefully unfolded the paper it read: My dearest Felicity your raven black hair and dark demeanor fill my heart with joy and makes everything I see different. Your sarcasm is that of poetry, You may not notice me but the clichés will be reverse and then we can be happy together.-Your admirer! My admirer. WHAT!? Wait, the question is why is this stuck to my gym shorts? I thought back to where I could have or someone else could have poseably passed a note to me. But a guy, I can only think of one time. OH,NO! OH,NO! The only time I can remember a guy passing a note to me was in gym. OH,NO! And it was with Ben Penerster.

That day Coach Grampler decided everyone was going outside, but he didn’t want us to run off and do any ‘hanky-panky’, whatever that is. He told girls to stretch because apparently we were going to run. The guys stretched in the middle of the track, but most of them did these complicated stretches just to get the girls attention and it worked. Ben and his posse were in the spot light and they were loving it. I was doing my sit-ups and every time I sat up, I could have sworn I saw Ben wink at me or maybe it was my imagination. As soon as I was done stretching I got up and ran. Every time I passed Ben he would whistle sharp and loud, you know that dumb boy/girl mating call whistle, ugggh, he would do that. Most of the girl’s I was running beside giggled and blushed but when Grampler turn his face, I flicked him off.

During the last five minutes of gym, I was finishing my last lap and everyone was heading toward the showers, but Ben. As I walked by him he grabbed my arm. Before I could make him wished he had never done that he softly said, ‘’Felicity, take-take-I-you-’’ his eyes fell toward the floor and he said nothing. All he did was looked into my eyes. ‘’Feel my soul, you’re the one that fuels it.’’ he said as he cupped my hand in his handed me a piece of paper and ran off. Not bothering to look or even try to explain what just happened, I walked casually to the locker rooms, where Vicky was waiting for me.

I never did tell Vicky what had happened that day. I guess I owe her, now. Fuming with frustration, I got up for a walk to get a little fresh air and maybe even make sense of what was at this present time, swimming around in my head. I walked straight out the door, I didn’t even stop to get my jacket even though it was in the middle of autumn. Rounding the corner, I made a left at Sunbath Avenue and walked toward somewhere. How could Ben do this to me, he knows I don’t like him or can’t he take a hint.

Why does he even like me? Is there not some snobbish popular girl that he could hook up with? Or is this all a dare? Yeh, that’s exactly what this is, a dare or some stupid joke. I didn’t even notice where I was going until I looked up. There stood the old abandon ice cream shop and right behind it or across from the shop was Ben’s house. I thought back to the first day I came to this town. I hated it. All the kids knew nothing about the Adam’s family, they didn’t even think it was cool when that grasshopper peed in my hand.

My parents told me to go and make nice with the other kids so I went to the famous hang out for kids. Then it was Noah’s Ice Cream Shop, where there’s two of everything. Walking in with my frilly pink dress and my giant black sash, I probably looked like the walking contradiction. I jumped on one of the bar stools. ‘’Hi, I want a ‘Worms in the Grave’ Ice Cream cup.’’ I said, smacking my lips. ‘’Sure thing, sweetie pie!’’ said Noah cheerfully. Back then Noah had dark brown hair that flipped to one side of his head due to his hat. He was tall, lean, and had these big bushy eyebrows that looked like it took up his whole face.

Swinging my legs while waiting on my treat, a brunette boy with the brightest hazel eyes I had ever seen sat next to me on one of the bar stools. ‘’Here you go, sweetie.’’ Noah said sliding the cup in front of me. It was a cup filled with crushed Oreos, gummy worms, and a piece of hard candy that had RIP written on it. Eyeing my treat the boy said, ‘’Noah, can I have what ever she’s having? Oh, and put her treat with mine, I’ll pay for them both.’’ ‘’Yes, sir. Mr. Big Spender’’ replied Noah tipping his hat. ‘’Hey you didn’t have to buy that for me. I have money of my own, See.’’ I said pulling out my coins, but they all fell out of my hand and onto the floor. ‘’Oh, let me get-’’ ‘’No, I’ll get it.’’ The boy said jumping out of his seat. ‘’Hey kid, what’s your name?’’ I inquired, peering down at him. ‘’Ben’ he said simply, ‘And you?’’ ‘’Felicity’’ I shrugged. ‘’There you go, kid.’’ said Noah appearing out of nowhere.

I was pushed out of my memories by hushed talking. It seemed to be coming from the side of the ice cream shop. ‘’She won’t know, if we don’t tell her.’’ whispered a male voice. ‘’But I hate lying to her like this.’’ a high pitched girl voice squeaked. ‘’Look, she’ll understand. Once we tell her.’’ the male voice sighed. ‘’She’ll get it. She’ll get us.’’ Then there was nothing but silence, after that I did hear lips locking. Wondering who this mysterious couple was I started to creep around the corner, but I saw Ben walking out of his house with some girl. CRAP! He may think that I’m stalking him. Trying to sneak the way I came, I stepped on a leaf.

Ben looked up and I immediately started to jog away. ‘’Felicity. Wait, I can explain, she is-’’ ‘’Hold up, Vicky. Don’t leave.’’ Vicky, what was see doing there. If Vicky was fooling around with Ben behind my back, we would have a Gigantic problem. I was so upset that I broke into a fast run. ‘’Felice, wait for me.’’ cried Vicky. Hearing her voice and thinking about what she and Ben could have done made me run even faster. I was so out of breath and sweaty by the time I got home, that Mrs. Smiley screamed when she saw me. ‘’Oh, honey, what happened?’’ ‘’Would you believe I was at a gym?’’ I asked sarcastically. Mrs. Smiley laughed and patted my head. Sighing from exhaustion, I sat down in our kitchen booth and brushed the hair out of my eyes.

Breathless, John walks in the door. ‘’Felicity-I-I-WHEW!’’ he sighs. ‘’If you want me to go out and jog with you then I’m sorry dear brother because that’s a flat out no.’’ I reply walking toward my room. ‘’It‘s not that, it‘s-’’ but I didn‘t hear the rest because I had already slammed the door shut. I fell back on my bed, gasping for breath. Please, heart stop beating so fast and why did all the blood drain from my face when I saw Ben with that other girl. I closed my eyes and tried to once again collect my thoughts.
Mars 22, 200+8

I woke up in a pool of sweat, jerking upwards so fast that I had to stop for a minute so I wouldn’t get a headache. Oh, what a terrible nightmare. I was at school and I couldn’t find Vicky anywhere. For some reason I panicked and started to run down the halls, in which Roger caught me and dragged me to a broom closet which read ‘Principal Office’. He suddenly had the power of a thousand men, because when I tried to fight him while he was pushing me in, he said, ‘’Shuuushhhh. I just need to talk to you.’’ I had never seen him so calm, cool, almost suave like.

I couldn’t believe that this was geeky, awkward, Roger. ‘’Felicity, I’m really turned on by you. Your dark demeanor, makes my floppy disk turn into a hard drive. You and that Vicky girl are always talking, I thought it was some kind of weird secret lesbian thing but hey, your spicy enough for me.’’ All while he was saying this, he inched closer and closer to me, pushing me up against the selves that were filled with cleaning products. Then it hit me, there were a selves filled with cleaning supplies! I stopped fighting and grabbed the first thing I could find behind my back. When Roger leaned in for a kiss, I threw Comet on his glasses, and I think it was old Comet because it had clumps of brown looking powder in it. Trying to wipe off his glasses, I decided that that was my moment of escape, so I ran. And I ran smack dab into no one else but Ben.

‘’Really! Out of all of the people I run into, it’s you!’’ I say, not so softly in my head but more out in the open. Ben looks hurt. Dang! me and my mouth will be my ruin. ‘’Felicity, I-I- I need to talk to you, privately.’’ he whispered as if we were in a crowded hallway. Feeling like there was some sort of pattern developing, I followed Ben into a classroom. What I didn’t notice until I tried to sit down was that, this particular classroom was no ordinary learning center, but the exact same place that the sex-ed class is taught at. Ben must have noticed it too because every time he looked at me, his eyes would search me up and down and then he’d look at his shoes and blush a shade darker than he was a second ago. This lasted for a least……….. Five minutes.

Once Ben got his courage back, he sheepishly said ‘’Felicity, I like you. I mean I really like you. Ever since I saw you with that stupid black sash over that big pink frilly dress’’ He laughs. ‘’You know, you always rev up my engine, I think now it’s time to find out what’s underneath yours.’’ He grinned, sinisterly; somehow developing confidence. I tried to run ,but Ben grabbed hold of my hand and pushed me down on a table. He forced his kisses on me as I tried to fight him. ‘’No can do, baby cheeks.’’ he teased in a mocking sort of voice.

‘’Get OFF!!!’’Iscreamed. ‘’Oh, someone’s feisty.’’ he grinned, looking down on me with a smile that touched his eyes. ‘’You know, what? Let’s do it!’’ he exclaimed like he’d discovered the cure to cancer. ‘’NO! Get Off Of ME! Ben, listen I-’’ he interrupted me. ‘’Felicity, we’re in a sex-ed class, I bet there are some condoms around here, somewhere………..’’ he trailed off. While he was looking behind the desk, I quietly slipped out of the class and sprinted down the hall. Turning the corner, I saw John and Vicky making out! The shock woke me up. And here I am.

Sweat beat down my face. It was only 4:03 in the morning when I turned to look at my clock. Groaning I feel back on my bed, and before I knew it, I was asleep. I woke up again at 10:27, this time with no crazy dreams, but it was to the sound of a crazy person. ‘’FELICITY!’’ Mrs. Smiley called from downstairs. ‘’Yeh‘’ I signed, yawning. ‘’It‘s time to get up, baby!’’ that robot of a woman called from downstairs. Feeling another yawn come out of me, I crawled out of bed and went to get dressed. ‘’Yeh, mom?’’ I asked walking in the room, throwing a sweater over my head. ‘’Oh, sleepy head, you‘re up!’’ she said cheerfully. I wiped my eyes, ‘’What do you need, mom?’’ ‘’Oh, I just wanted to make sure that you were awake!’’ she exclaimed. ‘’Well, I’m going out.’’ I mumbled to no one in particular. Before she could say ‘Good-bye‘, I slammed the door, put on my shades and walked into the morning light. The rays hit my glasses before I could even take two steps, ‘take that sun!’ I thought to myself.

I felt regenerated, yet on the other hand something seemed to be bugging me, but I couldn‘t quite put my finger on it. My stomach grumbled. So much so that I thought it was barking at me. Obeying my stomach, I walked towards the local ‘Dunken Doughnuts’ to buy myself a chocolate and sprinkle doughnut. The refreshing smell of dough and delicious frosting hit me like an atomic bomb, when I opened the door to the shop. Feeling like I was in complete rapture, I followed my sense of smell and stepped in line.

It was only eleven in the morning and thus far there were only two other customers. I was next in line when my phone rang. I didn’t want to be rude, so I turned around in the line and answered it. ‘’Hello, it‘s the gloom hotline.’’ I heard whoever it was on the other line laugh. Wait! I know that laugh. ‘’Yeh, well I‘m looking for a lost soul. Her name is Felicity Bradley, do you know her?’’ the voice inquired. ‘’It‘s Ghostgirl26.’’ I hissed into the phone. ‘’Oh, I’m sorry, Ghostgirl26.’’ said the voice, but I knew who the person on the other line was before she said her name. ‘’Well, if this is Crazy,NerdLove, then Ghostgirl26, is online viva phone.’’ I said trying not to laugh. Vicky gasped, ‘’No one‘s suppose to know that name. It may reveal my secret identity.’’ she giggled. ‘’Hey, Vicky.’’ I chuckled. ‘’Hi, Felicity. Whatcha up to?’’ she asked. ‘’Nothing much, I‘m just grabbing a bite at Dunken Doughnuts.’’ ‘’Oh, cool.’’ I heard someone talking in the background. ‘’Okay, hey Felice, I gotta go. Talk to you later.’’ she said. ‘’Bye, Vicky.’’ I called, then she hung up.

Turning back to tell the guy what I wanted, I discovered that during my chat I migrated to the corner of the store. Drat! All of a sudden a bunch of girls flocked toward the counter. Apparently, whoever was working there was the only sweet treat that all those girls wanted. I wanted to just get my doughnut and leave so whoever those girls were flocking over wouldn‘t get barfed on by me. Finally, I was back where I started, the second to first person in line. I couldn‘t tell who the guy was because the girl in front of me was leaning forward on the counter, apparently trying to show off her bare assets to the guy and I didn‘t want to be all on the butt that she didn‘t have. ‘’Uhhh, excuse me.’’ I coughed. The flirty girl turned around to look at me and with her eyes she made daggers. Dang! Talk about looks that could kill.

I was just about to see who ‘wonder boy’ at the counter was, when someone text me. Not wanting to repeat what happened a while back, I stepped up to the counter and ordered my chocolate doughnut with sprinkles; all while looking down at my phone. This time it was John. He text me and told me that he was going to mall and if I wanted him to pick up anything. I told him no. The guy at the counter turned around and said, ‘’One Chocolate- Sprinkle Surprise. That‘ll be five twenty-eight, Please.’’ ‘’Okay.’’ I replied, pulling out a ten dollar bill. While I was passing the bill to the guy, our hands touched and a static feeling passed between us.

Startled by what I felt, I looked up and quickly saw who ‘lover boys‘ identity was. BEN! I sucked in a deep breath and didn’t exhale until what felt like an eternity later. Apparently Ben was shocked too because he kept looking at me and then blushing a shade deeper than before. Just like my dream, that‘s so creepy. Finally Ben started out with ‘’Look, Felicity, I have to explain, what you saw yesterday.’’ once he said those words everything from the day before, flooded back to me like a herd of stampede. ‘’I-I-I’d like my doughnut now.’’ I sputtered out with as much confidence as I could muster. ‘’Well, if that‘s what you want, but hang around, I‘ll-’’ before he could say anything else, I snatched my doughnut and walked out with my head somewhat held high.

Man, why does Ben think he owes me an answer, because he doesn‘t. I stormed out of there, before I even knew what I was doing. I was so upset and I didn’t have a clue on why. As I walked out I thought about what I was going to do now that my head was swimming with events that had nothing to do with me. I wasn’t sure what to do, whether to take John up on his offer and got to the mall or to go inside and hear Ben out. Finally, I decided to just walk toward the scene of the crime.

Why did Ben like me? Who was the tramp that Ben was coming out of his house with? What random couple was that around the corner? Why did it sound like another guy entirely called out Vicky’s name? Who was Vicky really with? And why was John super sweaty when he came into the house? I had so many questions but no answers and no clue to where I could find any.

‘’Felicity, what are you doing here?’’ asked a voice that was coming from around the of the ice cream shop. ‘’What?’’ I nearly screamed from nervousness. ‘’Well, I‘m only going to say this one more time.’’ said the person coming out his corner, reveling the mystery voice to be John. ‘’Oh! John, I was scared that it was some strange creep.’’ I gasped mockingly, hugging him. ‘’No strange creep unless you put me on your hit list.’’ he said smiling and hugging me back. ‘’Never.’’ I beamed.

My brother sometimes seems to be the only person that cares about me. Then I felt his hand move away from my back and fan behind me as if shooing someone away. Confused, I looked up, that‘s when I heard it, a rustle of noise. I let go of John just to turn my head and see the last part of some girl run away. ’’Who’s that?’’ I asked trying to look at the mysterious girl. But John didn’t answer. All I saw was long amber-brownish hair swish in the wind. Strange that hair looked a lot like Vicky’s. I pushed the thought to the side as I followed John back home.

It was a quiet walk back to the house. John keep looking over his shoulder as if someone was following us. Once we got home, Mrs. Smiley frowned, looked me up and down and said, ‘’Why aren’t you turning into the perfect……… John, honey you look like you just got frighten out of your wits.’’ ‘’I’m fine, mom.’’ he gruffly replied. ‘’Well, what have you two been up to, recently?’’ she said, throwing on a fake smile.

‘’Hum, let me see.’ I said mockingly putting my finger on my head. ‘I’m pregnant, John is dating a man-woman, and my loins now burn for the school jock to inflame them with his masculinity.’’ Mrs. Smiley’s face drained at every word that I said. ‘’Mother, what is for din………..’’ sing-songed, Anna as she skipped into the kitchen. Her voice trailed at the sight of the war that was in front of her face.

I glared at my mother, with a smug look on my face. John’s mouth was gaping open, staring at me as if I was a criminal that escaped from his jail cell. Mrs. Smiley gawked at me, staring as though I said that I murdered a man. ‘’An…na.’ Mrs. Smiley, slowly pronounced, ‘Go to your room!’’ ‘’Okay…… mom.’’ Anna weakly replied, turning her head back to look at us with a scared look. Once Anna was out of earshot, Mrs. Smiley‘s face straighten up, almost as if morphing. ‘’Young lady, your rudeness had gone too, Far! At first I thought that maybe you were just going through a stage, but to Lie Like THAT, It Forces Me To Put Down my Foot!’’

I snorted, ‘’ Yeh ,but were are you going to out it down at, we have wood floors?’’ ‘’THAT‘S IT! GO TO YOUR ROOM!’ she commanded getting red in the face. ‘And the only thing that you‘ll eat tonight is your thoughts.’’ she stated matter-of-factly. ‘’Psshhhh, Felic, what are you going?’’ John whispered as if Mrs. Smiley had turned her back. ‘’Awww, she‘ll get over it in awhile, sides, you knew it was going to come to this sometime.’’ ‘’Yeh, but Not NOW!!’’ John yelled flinging his hands as if on the brink of hysteria. ‘’John, you can join her too.’’ Mrs. Smiley sternly said tapping her foot against the wood floors. ‘’No ma‘am.’’ he signed, bowing his head. ‘’Know Young Lady, GoodNight.’’ she declared pointing toward the stairs. ‘’Bye, cruel world, I‘ll see you again when the prison gates are opened.’’ I exclaimed, dramatically sweeping my hand over my head and climbing up the stairs.
Mars 16, 200+8

Another Monday. I thought as I crawled out of bed and turned off my obnoxiously loud alarm clock. Man, I knew I shouldn‘t have read all those Garfield comics. I stood in the middle of my room, debating if I should wash-up or go back to sleep for about extra five minutes. My feet were apparently calling all the shots, because while I was pondering my decision, it walked me straight to the bathroom. So much for that idea. It never took me long to wash- up, I mean all you do is brush your teeth, wash your face, put on Deo- ,use the toilet, you know the works. I always feel refresh once I‘ve freshened up.

When I walked to my closet, a feeling of anxiety rushed over me. I felt like everything in my closet wasn‘t good enough for today. It was as if I knew that there was going to be something major happening. I finally decided on one of my creations. It was an old see through slip that I turned into a skirt. The slip was all white with cream colored roses on it. I took my black t-shirt that was too big and cut it up. I sewed it on to the inside of the slip, making it a back color, so that the school couldn’t call me out and tell me that what I was wearing came from ‘Hookers R‘ Us.’ I wore a short sleeved t-shirt that said, ‘Bite Me If You DARE!’ in blood red letters. A ankle length blend in color’ leggings accompanied me with some red flats.

When Vicky saw me in the hallway, she looked me up and down and shook her head, ‘’I approve.’’ ‘’Good.’ I say. ‘I felt that I had to look cute, today.’’ ‘’Well, maybe today you‘ll concur the world.’’ ‘’Yeh!’ I perk up, ‘I always wanted to meet Pinky and the Brain.’’ She laughs. ‘’You know, you‘re the only person that can turn an old 90‘s TV show into a joke.’’ ‘’It‘s a gift.’’ I reply shrugging.


‘’Yo, Ben, what up man?’’ some voice calls from behind us. Ben. Oh, No! I really don‘t want to see or even think about Ben Penerster. Especially since I kind of didn’t show up after his shift. ‘’Vicky, is that the bell I hear?’’ I frantically say. ‘’What bell?’’ Vicky asked, wrinkling her eyebrows. ‘’Oh, I can definitely hear it now. Oh, well, duty calls. Bye Vicky.’’ I call over my shoulder as I rush down the hall. Phew ! I dodged a bullet there. I thought to myself. Now all I have to do is avoid him for the rest of the day and I’ll be free. All that running from Ben made me really thirsty, so I stopped by the water fountain to get a drink.


I believe that the water fountains are not only dirty, but expose all certain types of diseases toward me.
I was so thirsty that all my complaints went out the door. Once, I was finished, I stood back up and turned around just to bump into………..BEN!!! He seemed startled to see me as well, since he turned a bright red. ‘’Felicity.’’ He began. But I really didn‘t want to hear his explanation. I just wanted to avoid him, actually that was my plan for the day. ‘’I just-’’ but before he could say another word, the first bell rang. ‘’Oh, look at the time, I got to go. Bye, Ben.’’ I yelled over my shoulder, not wanting to look back at him.


Finally, a save haven! Then again…. This is school, I thought to myself as I walked into my first period class. I always had French as my first period. Most girls in my class signed up because they thought that French was such a romantic language, that and the French teacher is hot! His name was Mr. Heaton. He‘s 6‘5 with dark black hair that falls over his eye and little past his ears. He has these piercing green eyes, with speaks of blue in them. His dress code is more down-to-earth, I’m a teacher if I want to be, style. I’m always so psyched for his class, and today was no exception. ‘’Bonjour, classe. Comment allez-vous?‘’ he asked entering into the room and taking off his jacket. ‘’Je suis fine.’’ we all replied. ‘’C’est bon à entendre.’’ he chuckled, placing his fedora down on his desk. ‘’Bien écrire ce vers le bas. Marie Antoinette a été décapité peu après la mort de son -’’ he started before the school secretary, Ms. Noom walked in.


Today, Ms. Noom was dressed in her usual drab clothes. A big ugly gray sweater dress with dark blue tights. I hope she didn’t think anyone wouldn’t notice that her outfit doesn’t match, I thought. Even though she has a curvy figure a little plump side, but then no one‘s perfect. I heard a rumor that Ms. Noom dresses the way she does on purpose.


Apparently when she dressed cute, a bunch of male teachers would secretly be thinking about her. She use to cause a giant ruckuses. She even had the old sex- ed teacher freaking out. I was informed that the sex- ed teacher was talking about the male growth organ and female organ being stimulated and all of a sudden he started crying and asking his students why Ms. Noom didn‘t like him. I don‘t what really happened but that‘s what I heard.


Taking my opportunity to text Vicky I whipped out my phone and let my fingers do the talking. Vicky what you doing? I typed. Five seconds later I got a reply. Not listenin to my teacher. Lol. I laughed, causing a couple of people to look up from whatever they were doing. U know that I‘m always listenin to mine. She responded within ten seconds flat. OF COURSE!!! Remind me why we‘re friends? Lol. I asked. Cuz‘ without me, u‘d die. Oh, yeh, I forgot. Not. I typed. After a minute, she still hadn’t answered back. I wondered what was taking Vicky so long.


Bored and waiting for a reply, I decided to see what Mr. Heaton was talking about to Ms. Noom. ‘’Sure they can come in.’’ Who is they I questioned. ‘’Bienvenue dans ma classe’’ he smiled then blushed, forgetting that they didn‘t speak French. ‘’Welcome, to my class.’’ he translated. A lanky looking guy stepped in first, looking like he just robbed a tattoo parlor. My cell buzzed in my lap, telling me that I was getting a text message. Looking down at the phone, the words startled me to the core. MAYDAY! MAYDAY! His teach isn‘t hear! :0. crap. Is he in your class? I frantically typed.


This time I didn‘t get a response from Vicky. Oh,man. How am I going to ignore him if he comes in? I secretly prayed that he wouldn‘t come in. And apparently God heard my prayer because he never walked through that door. But what I didn‘t expect was what happened after my first period.


‘’Classe- oh I mean class dismissed.’’ Mr. Heaton declared. I was so upset with Vicky. How dare she never answer her text message. She always, Always responds to my texts. Mr. Heaton didn’t know what to do with us so he let us out early. I decided to plan a stalk out at Mrs. Duvile’s social science class. That way when Vicky is released she won‘t have anytime to run. I hid in the most appropriate place, right in between the fake shrub and the water fountain at the corner. I could see her door clearly if I just turned my head. ‘’ BRIIINNNNNGGGG!!!!!’’ the bell rang.


Alright, girly, it‘s time to meet your maker, I thought secretly laughing that I was calling myself Vicky‘s maker. Then I heard it, Vicky‘s laugh. I was about to step out and confront her when what I saw in front of me made my head spin. ‘’Oh, Ben you‘re so funny.’’ she twittered placing her arm threw Ben‘s as he lead her to her next class. ‘’Ha! If only Felicity could see me the same way.’’ he chuckled disappointment seeping through the words. ‘’Oh don‘t be so hard on yourself, she‘ll come around give her some time. And if she doesn‘t-’ she planted a kiss on his cheek ‘I will.’’ she replied seductively batting her eyelashes. So that‘s why she didn‘t answer me back. She was too busy trying to steal my man. Oh ,No! we are gonna have some serious problems if she tries that little stunt of hers again.


The memory came back at me like a flash of lighting. ‘’Felicity. Wait, I can explain, she is-’’ ‘’Hold up, Vicky. Don’t leave.’’ so she was with Ben that Saturday. But what I‘m having a hard time figuring out is, John‘s role in this whole debacle. Why was he so hot and sweaty when I saw him. ‘’It‘s not that, it‘s-’’ he was trying to tell me something but I assumed that it was trivial and it was something that could wait. Could he have been apart of that couple that was on the side of the building? Because I did find him and a girl there, yesterday. I had so many questions but no answers to any of them.


By lunch I had had enough. The idea of Vicky and Ben together killed me to the core. It had to be Vicky or me and I wasn‘t about to let Vicky be the winner of this race. I casually walked into the cafeteria, expecting to see Ben and his group waiting on one of their elite members before they headed off campus. The school decided that the juniors were responsible enough to go off campus ,too.


Once I walked into the cafeteria, the scene yet, again startled me. There was Ben and his friends crowded near the other exit talking and laughing, but when they started to disband, the center of attention wasn‘t a flirtatious girl but a rebel boy. Actually, my rebel boy, John was standing right in the mix of things. Ben was graciously building him up, smiling and hollering over his friends, ‘’THIS IS MY BROTHER!!! And ANYONE Who Dares Touch Him Shall Hafta Face ME!!’’ ‘’YEH!!!!’’ the guys yelled. John just stood there smiling, as Ms. Noom scurried in, trying to calm the boys down. What pigs, it thought as I walked away shaking my head.


I knew that Vicky and I needed to talk. NOW! I was aware, if she wasn‘t in the cafeteria then she had to be playing goody- goody and helping someone out. Today was a Monday so she was probably in either student government or band. I hated how she persuaded me to join the band. The both of us didn‘t know how to play any instrument but we at least tried. It was just the fact that she tried to play the clarinet and got in, but when I went to play the flute, the only note I heard was a sour one. The band leader practically laughed in my face.


My first hunch was the student government. The teacher, Mr. Lewis loved Vicky, he said that she was almost exactly like him when he was in school. He seemed to be keen on me, but I felt like I wasn’t in the same or near the same range that he held Vicky in. She‘d tell me I‘m crazy for even thinking like that but who‘s trying to steal someone else’s almost boyfriend?


Mr. Lewis smiled as I sauntered into his room. ‘’Why, hello, Ms. Bradley! What can I do for you today?’’ he asked. ‘’It seems ,nothing.’’ I replied as I looked at his empty room. ‘’Were you looking for someone?’’ he inquired cocking an eyebrow. ‘’Not the someone you‘re thinking of.’’ I answered feeling a little heated that he would think that I was looking for a guy. In all fairness I am a single girl in a class with at least seventy unspoken for guys. ‘’Oh.’’ he said, his eyes flickering with an emotion that I didn‘t know.


‘’Actually, I was looking for Vicky. I thought that student government had a meeting, today.’’ I replied trying not to sound too on edge. ‘’Nope, I called everyone this morning and told them that there was no meeting.’’ he happily responded. ‘’Oh, well thanks for your help.’’ I called out as I walked out his classroom. She wasn‘t in student government so that left, the band room. I strolled into the band room, trying to appear as though it didn‘t hurt me to walk into a room with people that practically laughed me out the door, but no one was there. Something weird was going on today and I decided it was my job to find out.

I didn‘t know where to start, but something told me to stop and think about this situation. I went into the girl‘s restroom and walked toward my favorite stall, the middle one. Once inside the middle stall, I started to evaluate what I knew from what I was trying to find out. I found a pencil behind my ear and a scrap piece of paper in my jacket, which I had used to write down homework on a day when I had neglected to grab my planner. Okay
let’s think about this:

Things I know:
Ben was with some girl at his house
Vicky’s name was called
John was sweaty like he’d been running
Ben tried to apologize
John hanging out with Ben
Vicky was flirting with Ben
Vicky disappearing


What I want to know:
Who was the tramp?
Who was Vicky with?
Why was John sweaty?
What was Ben apologizing for?
I thought John didn’t like Ben
Isn’t Vicky dating someone?
Where in the world is she?

There was something that was happening even though I wasn‘t quite sure of what it was. My first priority, I had to find Vicky. The chick was gonna give me some kind of answers. And she better not lie! Once again, I started out on my journey, bent on finding out something. I en-tern realized that ,this time it needed to be about every single player in this crazy game, that we call life.

If we were going to play a game, I had to be prepared. First thing first, the vital part of my job was to figure out who was the first player. I pulled my piece of my paper out of my jacket. I needed a moment to think things over. Thankfully, the school bell, rang, signaling that lunch was through and everyone should be headed toward their fifth period class. The thought of skipping gym, occurred to me, but I quickly dismissed it, due to the fact that there were only thirty to forty girls in my gym period. In other words, if you didn‘t show up to gym, Coach Grampler assumed the worst happened to you.

One day Missy Huefer missed gym for a whole week because she caught the flu from these kids that she was babysitting. Coach thought that she was pregnant and was ashamed to show up in her uniform with a baby bump showing. I came five minutes late to his class, he supposed that I had broken my leg. He even believed that Vicky was lying to him about Mrs. Jacqueline keeping her after class. When everyone knows that Mrs. Jacqueline keeps people after class. He thought that Vicky was with Kasey Nieler, because they both showed up late. As if, Vicky can’t the sight of Kasey, let alone talk to hi.


I laughed quietly to myself as a deep voice chuckled. ‘’Whatcha, laughing about?’’ He asked, his eyes lighting up. Startled by the apparent figure strolling next to me, I furiously replied ‘’None of your business!’’ As I tried to walk away from him, increasing my distance between us with every step I took. ‘’Wait, Felicity.’’ he cried. A smirk appeared on my face as I bounced through the hallways toward the exit that led out to the walkway of the gym.

‘’Hey, Ba- Felic. WAIT!’’ Ben practically cried as he touched my shoulder. When I turned around to look him in his face, I didn‘t know what to say or do. He looked like he was on the verge of a breakdown. His face was timid, while his eyes held back tears, he bit his lip and turned a deep reddish color. I wasn‘t sure whether to bust out laughing or take pity on him. I couldn‘t run since he sort of had me pinned to the exit door, both of his hands directly stretched out, touching the door. I titled my head, trying to see Ben‘s face given that he buried himself from me while he stared at the floor. ‘’Felic. I need you. Just that and nothing more. Everything I do is for you.’’ at the ‘for you‘ part he glanced up.

One day Missy Huefer missed gym for a whole week because she caught the flu from these kids that she was babysitting. Coach thought that she was pregnant and was ashamed to show up in her uniform with a baby bump showing. I came five minutes late to his class, he supposed that I had broken my leg. He even believed that Vicky was lying to him about Mrs. Jacqueline keeping her after class. When everyone knows that Mrs. Jacqueline keeps people after class. He thought that Vicky was with Kasey Nieler, because they both showed up late. As if, Vicky can’t the sight of Kasey, let alone talk to hi
I laughed quietly to myself as a deep voice chuckled. ‘’Whatcha, laughing about?’’ He asked, his eyes lighting up. Startled by the apparent figure strolling next to me, I furiously replied ‘’None of your business!’’ As I tried to walk away from him, increasing my distance between us with every step I took. ‘’Wait, Felicity.’’ he cried. A smirk appeared on my face as I bounced through the hallways toward the exit that led out to the walkway of the gym.

‘’Hey, Ba- Felic. WAIT!’’ Ben practically cried as he touched my shoulder. When I turned around to look him in his face, I didn‘t know what to say or do. He looked like he was on the verge of a breakdown. His face was timid, while his eyes held back tears, he bit his lip and turned a deep reddish color. I wasn‘t sure whether to bust out laughing or take pity on him. I couldn‘t run since he sort of had me pinned to the exit door, both of his hands directly stretched out, touching the door. I titled my head, trying to see Ben‘s face given that he buried himself from me while he stared at the floor. ‘’Felic. I need you. Just that and nothing more. Everything I do is for you.’’ at the ‘for you‘ part he glanced up.
One day Missy Huefer missed gym for a whole week because she caught the flu from these kids that she was babysitting. Coach thought that she was pregnant and was ashamed to show up in her uniform with a baby bump showing. I came five minutes late to his class, he supposed that I had broken my leg. He even believed that Vicky was lying to him about Mrs. Jacqueline keeping her after class. When everyone knows that Mrs. Jacqueline keeps people after class. He thought that Vicky was with Kasey Nieler, because they both showed up late. As if, Vicky can’t the sight of Kasey, let alone talk to hi
I laughed quietly to myself as a deep voice chuckled. ‘’Whatcha, laughing about?’’ He asked, his eyes lighting up. Startled by the apparent figure strolling next to me, I furiously replied ‘’None of your business!’’ As I tried to walk away from him, increasing my distance between us with every step I took. ‘’Wait, Felicity.’’ he cried. A smirk appeared on my face as I bounced through the hallways toward the exit that led out to the walkway of the gym.

‘’Hey, Ba- Felic. WAIT!’’ Ben practically cried as he touched my shoulder. When I turned around to look him in his face, I didn‘t know what to say or do. He looked like he was on the verge of a breakdown. His face was timid, while his eyes held back tears, he bit his lip and turned a deep reddish color. I wasn‘t sure whether to bust out laughing or take pity on him. I couldn‘t run since he sort of had me pinned to the exit door, both of his hands directly stretched out, touching the door. I titled my head, trying to see Ben‘s face given that he buried himself from me while he stared at the floor. ‘’Felic. I need you. Just that and nothing more. Everything I do is for you.’’ at the ‘for you‘ part he glanced up.

‘’Oh, Ben.’ I sighed ‘You really are screwed up. Please forget me. Find some girl that will truly think of you the way I‘m sure you think of me.’’ I calmly said, shocked at where all of this talk was coming from. Too many stupid movies. I think. His eyes morphed into a hard glare that seem to never end. Suddenly frighten, I pushed the silver bars of the door, open behind me. I heard Ben’s startled reaction as he lost his balance. I knew that I was definitely in trouble with him, now. I ran down the walkway and straight into the gym, I think I knocked a girl down in the process. The minute Vicky saw me rush in the locker-room, she stopped undressing and ran in my direction with question filling her eyes.

‘’What‘s wrong?’’ she questioned. Breathless, I huffed. ‘’It‘s nothing.’’ I hunched over ready to gag. ‘’You sure?’’ she slowly inquired, concern filling her voice. ‘’Geez, Vicky! I said I‘m fine!’’ I barked irritation creeping inside my voice. ‘’Well, you don‘t have to be so mean about it.’’ she snapped, tears threatening to come out. Then I remembered how she acted after first period, hanging all over Ben. ‘’I gotta get dressed.’’ I replied, unaware that my face had turned red. ‘’Okay.’’ she sniffed turning away from me to get dressed. Just then her phone buzzed, signaling that she got a new text message.

Our lockers coincidently right next to each other. We slowly put on our uniforms in the quiet. Neither one making eye contact or speaking. Once Vicky had finished dressing, she scowled then turned on her heels. I couldn‘t bear seeing her act this way toward me, I just needed to get through to her. I reached out for her hand, she quickly spun around, fire burning in her eyes.


It was my turn to be surprised. ‘’Vicky-what-I-Vicky?’’ ‘’No, Felic‘ she retorted ‘I tried. Gosh, Felic, I tried but you‘re just so-’’ she didn‘t finish her sentence. ‘’What are you talking about?’’ I asked completely confused at her actions toward me. ‘’I tired to make him like you. I even……..’ her voice trailed off. ‘I just can’t believe you would treat him the way you did. I didn’t even know that you possessed the power to be that mean.’’ And with that she shook free of my grasp, turned around and walked out. She left me sitting on the bench, arm outstretched and looking dumbstruck. I finally got over my initial shock and shuffled out onto my grassy doom.


‘’Bradley! Where have you been? You look like crap.’ he pulled me aside and asked ‘Who’s the father?’’ I was just about to tell him that I wasn’t pregnant when Ben walked out looking even worst than I felt. ‘’Penerster! Where were you at?’’ he questioned. Looking around at a bunch of seemingly bored teenagers, Coach Grampler hollered ‘’Is everyone okay, today? I mean the boys are mimicking the hobos on the streets ,all bent over and out of shape and the girls look like they belong at the maturity ward or the working for gossip column, whispering and smiling and such.’’

‘’Huh? No answers? Then everyone run around the track four times.’’ Groans went throughout the crowd. ‘’Next time speak up!’’ he cried pointing to the track. I had to sort out one of my mistakes if not all of them. Then the answer to my question came to me. The first player was Vicky, she might as well been the only player, if it was up to me. I started to jog up next to her, but some of Ben’s friends got in the way.


‘’What‘s wrong, Pat Benentar, did you lose your one and only fan?’’ a big muscle guy named Tony teasingly asked me. I hated Tony. I know that ever girl wants a guy that‘s tall, dark and handsome. Well let‘s just say that the only thing Tony‘s got going for him. The dufus can‘t even do basic Algebra 1. Let alone any other subject that requires him to use his brain. I smirked at my funny comment. (Now that I think back it was mean of me to judge Tony like that).

‘’Hey, toots.’’ a skinny blonde boy dressed like he‘s waiting for his role as Danny Zuko sneers. ‘’Yes, Zach.’’ I reply trying not to roll my eyes. ‘’I hear you dumped our boy. What gives? I mean you lucky enough to even find a guy that likes you, cuz for awhile we all thought you…. You know.’’ ‘’No I don‘t know.’’ I pronounced, but I had a hunch that the whole student body thought I was leaning a little to far to the left.

Tony and Zach laughed. ‘’For one, I didn‘t dump Ben. We were never together and secondly I was trying to do something important before the two of you got in my way.’’ ‘’Like what?’’ Tony questioned. ‘’Like none of your business.’’ I replied sticking out my tongue. ‘’Oh, I see what‘s going on.’ Tony smiled looking over his shoulder. ‘You need to apologize to your girlfriend.’’ he teased pointing not-so-discretely to Vicky. Tony snickered. ‘’Hey, Tony what‘s pi equal?’’ I asked tired of their ridicule. ‘’Uh……….’’ Tony stopped jogging backwards and stood there. Just as soon as Zach started to laugh, he tripped over Tony‘s feet and fell backwards. Losers, I thought to myself as I keep jogging.

‘’BRADLEY!!!!’’ hollered Coach Grampler. ‘’Yes, sir.’’ I answered, running toward the side of the gym. ‘’I need you to show Penerster and Calsep how to do a basic leg stretches.’’ ‘’But sir, they already know how to do the leg stretches.’’ I countered, feeling confused. ‘’YOU’LL DO AS I SAY, Soldier, Cuz This Is A War! You Don‘t find Men Like These everyday.’’ he said, softening his voice toward the end, then he walked off. I turned around to look at what I mentioned earlier as my grassy doom. Ben and Vicky.

Poor, Ben. He looked so hurt. Almost as if he was a lonely puppy that didn‘t get a treat for doing something good. And Vicky, I‘ve never seen her look so, so timid. She was staring down at the ground, hand behind her back, leg twisted up. ‘’Well, um…………………’’ I stuttered. ‘’Look, Felic- I mean Felicity. We wanta get out of here as fast as you do, so don‘t make this hard.’’ Ben coldly said. That really hit me. ‘’Don‘t make This Hard! And Standing in Front Of Two Of The Most Important PEOPLE In My Life, Is Easy!!!? I‘m sorry if that‘s not hard enough for you.’’ I reacted, giving him the cold shoulder. ‘’Gosh! Felicity! Why Does EVERYTHING Have To Be About YOU!???? Huh? I mean, look at Vicky and I.’ he uncontrollably yelled. ‘Do You THINK That We‘re HAPPY ABOUT THIS SITUATION??’ he asked, walking toward me, flinging his arms like a mad man. ‘’I-I-I-’’ but he cut me off. ‘’NO, YOU DON‘T KNOW! IF ONLY YOU COULD SEE YOU, THE WAY I SEE YOU, THE WAY VICKY SEES YOU!!!!!’’ he screamed. I felt the impending flood of tears gather in my eyes as he hovered over me.

I couldn‘t take this anymore. I backed-away from Ben, shrinking in all of his words. Before I ran, I peered around Ben’s shoulder to glance at Vicky. She was just standing there, looking at me with a facial expression that I could not describe. I took off running, confused of what just happened, or the person that I had become. The wind felt good on my skin, almost as though it was lifting me off the ground. I didn‘t care what Coach Grampler thought, or where he believed I was. All I knew was that the only person I could count on was myself.

I hurried into the gym doors, not caring if they slammed. The tears fell down my face, faster and faster. I felt the salty taste of my tears fall into my mouth. I needed to get away from here and I wanted to get out of this school as fast as I could. Unfortunately Mr. and Mrs. Smiley bullied me, into the notion that if I skip anymore classes for this semester….. let‘s just say that they wouldn‘t be too happy. I had plenty of time to waste.

Since I finished getting dressed, I walked outside the gym and into the actual building. There’s still about ten minutes left before sixth period begins. I rushed to the bathroom since the tears came streamed ran down my face as I strolled down the hall. The pain from today‘s events came crashing upon me. Vicky’s flirtatiousness, Ben‘s praising of my brother, John not being at his own school, Vicky disappearing, Ben‘s hurtful glares, and Vicky without a spine. I pulled out the piece of paper with things that I wanted to know, balled it up, and threw it over the bathroom stall. I hope whoever finds it, thrashes it and never second guess what kind of paper it was. I bent over myself, then buried my hands in my face. The ringing of the school bell drowned out my sobs until I couldn’t cry anymore.

The author's comments:
Sorry it took so long, i had alittle writers block, but no worries now. Enjoy!

After the bell stopped ringing, the loom of sixth period dawned on me. I knew I had to walk out this restroom and what was going to happened, I didn‘t know. The threat of hateful stares and harmful rumors ran through my head like an impending rain cloud that wouldn‘t go away. I had to face this terrible, horrible, monster. Slowly, I got up, unlocked the stall, and proceeded to open the restroom door, when it almost swung forward and hit me in my face.

Vladina and Gemma walked in, unaware that they could have knocked the wind out of me. ‘’I know right.’’ Vladina chirped. ‘’Yeh, I was there to see the whole thing, I can‘t believe it either.’ Gemma commented, ‘I mean, all I remember was seeing someone run off the field, Ben comforting Vicky while she cried, then next thing we all knew, Ben snapped.’’ ‘’What do you mean snapped?’’ Vladina questioned.

I stayed perfectly still in front the door as the two girls talked over their stalls. ‘’He snapped. Marshall asked him what happened? Before he could answer Tony whispered someone’s name into Zach’s ear and they started to laugh. I guess Ben heard it, because he ran straight into Tony and head-butted him. It was ridiculous, they started to fight then, no one knew what to do. After a while Coach Grampler came out of nowhere and broke it up. He sent the rest of us to dress in.’’ ‘’Uh, that‘s weird.’’ Vladina said. The girls started to unlock their stalls.


I didn‘t want them to know that I was listening so I ran out that restroom as fast as my legs could carry me. The adrenaline of my sudden scare, pushed me all the way through the halls to my sixth period class. I was almost near the door when a sharp yell filled my ears, ‘’STOPPPP!!!! There Is NO Running In THIS HALL!’’ the person cried, stopping everyone in their path. Everyone was frozen in a position as if we were playing freeze tag. I spun around to look my accuser in the face, it was none other than Roger Arkwright.

‘’Well, well. Felicity Bradley.’’ he smirked, smiling at my misfortune. ‘’Roger Arkwright, nice to see you got a confidence. Where did you buy it at, the Nerd Store?’’ I asked picking up his tie and throwing it in his face. A nervous look flashed across his face. ‘’Felicity, let‘s cut to the chase. I‘m afraid- I mean not scared of you.’ he quickly rationalized ‘And the only reason we‘re talking like this is because you‘re in trouble for running in the halls and being late.’’ ‘’Thanks, I got the memo, Mr. safety patrol. Goodbye.’’ I hollered over my shoulder.

He looked like he was gonna pee his pants. I walked into Ms. Grey‘s Pre- Calculus class ten minutes late. I hated being late for her class, since I got Math pretty easily, that and French. ‘’Miss Bradley, you‘re late. I don‘t want an excuse, just give me the answer to this problem.’’ she quickly commanded, sweeping her hand toward the blackboard. On the board it read Factor: c+17(2c-5p)-3=? Oh, well that was easy, I thought. All you had to do was multiply the x+17 times the 2x-5p, then leave the -3 because you factor out anymore. I wrote 2c2+34c-5cp-85p-3. Ms. Grey eyed me up and down as if I reeked of the sewer. ‘’Very good, Miss Bradley, but next time you feel inclined to show up late for my class remember ‘Time is math, and that is all around you.’’’


I felt my ears burn as I went to take my seat. ‘’Today we will study the fascinating world of ‘Factorial and how to use them in a calculated problem.’ Groans ran through the whole class; I would have joined them in complaining if I didn‘t already know how to find Factorials. Ms. Grey had a way of making anything remotely interesting, boring. Almost like the teacher off of ‘Ferris Bueller‘s Day Off.’

Man! If Mathew Broderick stayed the same age that he was when he filmed the movie, I wouldn’t know what to do! Truthfully, I really am looking for a guy kind of like Ferris Bueller. Dark, tall (but not so much that it’s over bearing), rebellious, but knows how to have a good time, funny, outspoken, sweet and romantic. Just as I was imaging myself dating Ferris Bueller, I was snapped out of it by the clicking of a mechanical pen. Crap! I was day dreaming again. ‘’Pshhhh.’ I whispered to Butch Pattershear. ‘What are we doing?’’ Making sure Ms. Grey wasn‘t watching he leaned in and murmured ‘’Page 382 numbers one through ten.’’ ‘’Thanks.’’ I replied pulling out pencil and paper.


Seventh period finally came and I was glad for a moment alone. My seventh period was Library/Study Hall. There‘s about twenty students crammed into a small library either sitting at tables, studying, looking through books, typing on a laptop or library computer. I doubt anyone would miss me if I was gone. I went to my locker and pretended to change out books until the hallways were empty.

Then I jumped into action, running in the direction of the secret door. There is a side door at the beginning of the building. It‘s suppose to be the janitors’ closet, but they gave him a better one. Fortunately, he keeps it unlocked during school hours just in case of an emergency. The cool thing about this closet was that if you pushed the large janitorial cart aside, there in plain sight was an invisible door, covered up so you wouldn‘t recognize it. If pushed open, it led down a flight of stairs to some indoor vending machines, complete with sodas, chips, and candy.

This was my home away from home. Not even Vicky knows about this place. Not Even Vicky. The words rang through my ears like an everlasting song. Not Even Vicky, Not Even Vicky. The tears started to flow down my face, once more as I slowly slid onto the floor, my back against the soda machine. I cried and drank, and cried and ate until I lost all recollection of time. I didn‘t know what time it was but I knew I had to get out of here.


Once outside the closet, I figured it was almost time to go home so I stopped by my locker to grab my backpack and leave. The sunlight hit my eyes, practically blinding me to death. The moment my eyes adjusted to the light, my sight focused on my next target. John. He was leaned up against my car, staring into oblivion.

‘’Hey, soul seeker.’’ I boldly yelled approaching my car. ‘’Oh hey.’’ he dully replied turning his head to look through me, not at me. ‘’What‘s wrong?’’ I asked, concerned by his hard but hurtful glaze. ‘’Nothing.’’ he flatly answered. ‘’No, something‘s wrong.’’ I softly countered. ‘’Fine.’ he sighed running his hands through his hair. ‘I‘m having problems.’’ ‘’Awwwwww, women problems.’’ I smiled suddenly feeling better. ‘’Ughhhhh, Don’t Do THAT’ he groaned. ‘Just drop it.’’ ‘’Okay. I surrender.’’ I laughed throwing up my hands mockingly and getting inside the drivers‘ seat.

As John hopped in the passenger seat, a question escaped my lips. ‘’Hey, John.’’ ‘’Yeh.’’ he responded. ‘’How did you get here?’’ ‘’I hid in your backseat, drove to school, faked being sick, teacher told me to go home, I drove to your school instead.’’ he shrugged. ‘’Smart, Very, Smart.’’ I contemplated as I backed out of my parking space.

When we got home, we had the house to ourselves on the account that Mrs. Smiley had gone grocery shopping. ‘’What now?’’ I asked John, putting the note back on the refrigerator. We shared wicked smiles as the both of us raced to the TV. ‘’CALLED IT!’’ we simultaneously yelled, grabbing for the remote. ‘’I’ve missed the last five episodes of ‘Being Human’ and I don’t plan on missing anymore.’’ I laughed, snatching the remote. ‘’And ‘Justified’ isn’t gonna watch itself.’’ he remarked, stealing the remote and turning to On-Demand. By the smug smile on John‘s face and his hunched over posture, I knew I had lost the battle.


Thankfully, technology was on my side. My laptop roared to life as I logged onto my section. The reason I had a password to My Own Laptop was because of John and Peter. When I first got it, they use to spend hours trying to guess my code. It was always funny to watch them do that. They even sometimes guessed right, but didn‘t type it in, claiming it to be too obvious of an answer. I would just laugh and not say anything. I chuckled, remembering a fond memory of my life.

Then I thought of John. Poor, John. Does he know about my problems with Vicky and Ben? After all the hard work he‘s been doing to make nice with MY FRIENDS. Man, I can not tell him about this, not now. Not like this, I thought shaking my head as if to get rid of the idea. I‘ll get around to it, I finally decided, putting my headphones in.

Septum 17, 200+8




‘’Felicity, Squawk. Felicity, Squawk.’’ ‘’Yes.’’ I called trying to figure out who just asked for me. All I knew was that I was in a weird place. Everywhere I looked, there were trees. These trees were small, big, tall, wide, gigantic, and any other adjective you can think of. I was standing on a dirt path, I couldn’t tell where the rest of the path lead because the trees were blocking my view.



‘’Were am I at?’’ I thought out loud. ‘’Felicity, Squawk. Felicity, Squawk.’’ ‘’Yes.’’ I cried turning around in circles, to find the face of the voice that just called me. ‘’Squawk, come and find me. Squawk, come and find me.’’ ‘’No.’’ I said, stamping my foot. Whoever or whatever this thing was I wanted it to tell me how to leave this place. ‘’Squawk, fine, Squawk, fine.’’ It replied descending from it‘s place somewhere above my head. What I thought would come down ended up being a total contradiction.


The bird, if I can call it that was at least ten stories high with a magnificent assortment of colors for it’s coat. There had to be no less than eight different shades of blue that seemed to hold the rest of colors in place. It‘s beak was a sun kissed orange with a pale tan scar slashing the side. He quickly looked up as if hearing someone call his name. ‘’Squawk, human where are you? Squawk, human where are you?’’ ‘’DOWN HERE!!!!!’’ I practically screeched, trying to get its’ attention.


‘’Ahhhh, Squawk, child you have made a enormous mistake. Squawk, child you made an enormous mistake.’’ ‘’But how?’’ I asked confused by its’ words. ‘’Squawk, your friends truly love you. Squawk, your friends truly love you.’’ was all that it said. ‘’I know that.’’ I huffed upset at the news he was telling me. ‘’Squawk, they all did what they did for you. Squawk, they all did what they did for you.’’ ‘’What do you mean they did all they could do for me?’’ I questioned the bird-thing, tired of playing riddles with it.


The bird-thing just looked past me. ‘’I know you here me, you Thing!’’ I yelled, stamping my foot. ‘’Squawk, think about today. Squawk, think about today.’’ it simply replied. ‘’What about today?! That It Was ONE Of The WORST Day Of My Life!!!’’ I hollered, frustrated by the events that reappeared in my head. I couldn‘t deal with it anymore, all that Thing was doing was bringing back the extra tears that I hadn‘t shed. I’m through, I thought as I turned and marched, not sure of where I was going.



‘’Squawk, I know your friend Victoria hurt you, but she really tried to help you. Her actions may look terrible, but she was purely respectable in her intentions.’’ it said. I noticed that it didn’t repeat itself. ‘’Wait! You didn’t repeat yourself.’’ I reminded him in a questioning tone. ‘’Squawk, I don’t know what you’re talking about. Squawk, I don’t know what you’re talking about.’’ Blowing a piece of hair out of my face, I replied ‘’What about Vicky?’’ ‘’Squawk, Vicky didn’t hurt you on purpose. Squawk, Vicky didn’t hurt you on purpose.’’


‘’So………. Vicky was trying to help me?’’ I asked attempting to get more information out of it. ‘’Squawk, Vicky did what she could. Squawk, Vicky did what she could.’’ ‘’Okay……….’ I contemplated ‘But That Ben Intentionally Did His Dirty Deeds!’’ I bitterly scoffed.


‘’Squawk, Ben truly likes you, if only you could notice. Squawk, Ben truly likes you, if only you could notice.’’ ‘’STOP!!!’ I growled, ‘ENOUGH With BEN LIKES You This And BEN Likes You That!!!’’ ‘’Squawk, he tried to impress you by being friends. Squawk, he tried to impress you by being friends.’’ ‘’Being friends with Who?’’ I questioned. ‘’Squawk, friends with you. Squawk, friends with you.’’ the large bird replied, refusing to look down at me. ‘’Hhhmmmm.’’ I mused trying to understand what the crazy thing meant. ‘’You‘re telling me that Vicky was intentionally hiding from me, and that Ben only wanted to be friends?’’ I questioned the thing. ‘’Squawk, I can’t answer that. Squawk, I can’t answer that.’’


Before I could ask him why, a loud buzzing noise filled the whole jungle/forest area. I woke up aggravated by the ear-splitting sound that blasted out of my alarm clock. There appeared to be a dark black rain cloud forming over my head as I slowly trudged to the bathroom. I despised the way I looked, but today was even worst. While I stared at myself in the mirror, my face morphed from ugly to hideous within a matter of seconds. I was so upset, I could THROW SOMETHING!!!!


I walked into my room, seething and angry. Marching straight toward my closet, I pulled out the first piece of clothes that my hands touched. Thankfully the clothes happened to match my mood. A plain gray hoodie with some black cotton jeans. I loved the way the jeans felt. It was soft, comfortable and hugged me just right, almost like baking a cake and eating it too!


When I walked downstairs, Mrs. Smiley came out of nowhere and stopped me. ‘’Did you think about your actions, last night? I see that you are definitely felling remorse.’’ she scoffed, eyeing me with a critical look. ‘’Yes, ma’am.’’ I replied, prepare to get away from the already awkward conversation. ‘’Okay.’’ she slowly said, turning around, thus ending our chat. I couldn‘t stay in this house anymore.


Grabbing a bagel off the table, I called out to Mrs. Smiley, ‘’I‘m leaving.’’ Walking into the cool autumn breeze, I pulled my hoodie over my head. It was still fairly early so I went to the local Dunken Doughnuts. During the fall, Dunken Doughnuts has a ‘Fall in Love with Singing’ event.


Basically if you can sing, you drum in business and the crowd likes you, then you go on the ‘Seasonal Singers’ wall. Essentially, there’s a picture of you with your name, placed on the wall for everyone to see. I couldn’t sing, but I always liked to listen to the many members of Lakechip sing their hearts out. It was the only thing that I didn’t mind doing with my family. It made me smile!


A little boy about the age of seven was nervously singing some song about fall leaves and wanting winter to come. It was cute, for all that it was worth. While I was paying for my Hot Chocolate a voice came over the speakers. ‘’Hey, guys. I want to dedicate this song to a very special girl. I know what I did seemed wrong but, if you give me a chance, I’ll make up for time lost.’’ ‘’Yeh, sing it Ben!’’ some random dude yelled behind me. Ben. Man, I do not want to be the TV soap opera for the whole town to see.


‘’This song requires some assistance, so if you could, my lovely sister accompany me in a duet.’’ Sister?! I contemplated, stopping in my tracks before I could creep away. ‘’GO, Iris!!!’’ hollered a tall, black-haired man with a Colgate smile. I turned my attention back to the stage. A small, shy brunette with purple streaks in her hair came walking up the steps. She had on some blue jeans, a turquoise sweater, cowboys boots and a light brown scarf that made her hair color stand out. She’s my dream girl, I thought hoping no one noticed my now agape mouth.


Once Iris sat down on the adjoining stool, she changed into this big personally. ‘’HIT IT!’’ she cried snapping her fingers. What I expected to be a fast song turned into one of the most iconic winter love songs of all time. ‘’I really can't stay. (But, baby, it's cold outside) I got to go away ( I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice) I ought to say no, no, no, Sir (Mind if I move in closer? What's the sense of hurting my pride?) Ahh, but it's cold outside, I simply must go (But, baby, it's cold outside) The answer is no (But, baby, you'll freeze out there) Say, lend me a comb (It's up to your knees out there)
You've really been grand (I thrill when you touch my hand, but don't you see, how can you do this thing to me?) at that part he searched for my face, when coming upon it, he smiled and winked.


Thank goodness, everyone was looking at them instead of me. I raised my cup to him as if saying ‘Hey’. He gave me a toothy grin, back. After the song and my chocolate were gone, Ben came up to me with a nervous face, but angry eyes. ‘’Hey, we’re going to have a talk.’’ he commanded, gently pushing me into a corner. ‘’Okay, talk.’’ I say, trying to imitate his confidence.


‘’Felicity,’’ he started, determination in his voice. ‘’Yes.’’ I replied, my heart beating faster with every single minuet that passes. ‘’DON’T Look Like THAT!!’’ he furiously growled, clenching his fists by his side. ‘’Like what?’’ I asked, scared by his change of mood. ‘’LIKE THAT! THAT STUPID Doe-Eyed, ‘Woe Is Me’, ‘I’m A VICTUM’ Look! ‘Cuz GUESS WHAT, You’re NOT!’’ this time, he punched the wall.


I had never seen him so shaken, so enraged, so masculine. I wanted to run away from him, also hug him until rage the seeped away. The idea of being attracted to Ben was a laugh, so much so that I quickly dismissed the notion. Ben was fuming, now. ‘’AND YOU‘RE LAUGHING!!!!!’’ he yelled, his voice rising at every syllable. I was terrified and didn‘t know what to do. ‘’Ben-I-I-I’’ before I could say anymore, I noticed his sister and that dark-haired guy walk up.


She squeezed his shoulders, ‘’Ben……’’ she softly whispered, dragging out his name. Ben’s whole body seemed to withdrawal, as she talked to him. The dark-haired guy stood in the background, rocking on his feet. ‘’Edgar, I think that you and Ben should sit down, over there………’’ she said, guiding Ben towards the Edgar guy. She watched as Ben sank into a chair, across from Edgar.

Then she snapped her head around and stared at me, with the scariest look that I had ever seen. She had the sweetest smile, but the meanest eyes. ‘’So………. You‘re the girl that‘s taken my baby brothers heart.’ she looked me up and down ‘Well, at least you’re prettier than I anticipated, but what I want to know is if you’re nicer than expected?’’ Iris crossed her arms, over her chest as she slowly sauntered toward me. ‘’Iris, can I call you that? I didn’t mean to do anything to hurt Ben. It’s just that-that’’ I stopped talking because I couldn’t think of anything else to say.


‘’Look, I know that I’m definitely not what you would think of when someone says Ben’s sister, but you’re not exactly what I thought of when he described you, either. So here’s how it’s gonna go. My brother likes you, even though you seem to bring his blood pressure up. I can‘t explain it, but somehow he likes you. Therefore, whatever’ she flung her hand ‘You two had a fight or quarrel over, let it dissolve.’’


She leaned in ‘’Because I love my brother and it seems that he fancies you, so I’ll let you in on a little secret’ she motioned for me to come closer ‘I’ve helped Ben see what type of girlfriend he has, I have no problem doing it again, Okay?’’ she chirped throwing her arm around my shoulder and dragging me toward the table.


Ben and Edgar looked super uncomfortable sitting there, not making eye contact. ‘’Edgarrrrrrrr’ Iris sing-songed ‘I’m ready to go! Ben are and’ She coughed ‘Felicity, is it? Are you gonna need a ride to school?’’ I was about to object when Iris gave me a demanding look. Ben, in turn, gave me a sideways glance and replied ‘Sure, we’ll need a ride.’’ ‘’Yeh.’’ I chimed, throwing on my fake smile.



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