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Pirates Vs. Ninjas

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Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4

The Vampire Club

Present day, Pi had made his way to the club. This caused him to stop the reminiscing.
The Vampire Club was a two story complex. The first was a wide base, with plenty of room for parties, letting any Goths in. The second was a more private establishment, only letting true vampires in. There was a bouncer outside the stairs to the second floor, checking by pressing a cross to their palm. If they were burned, they proudly wore the scar into the club. If they were fine, the bouncer threw them
I could not finish this chapter, but i am still working on it and will finish it when i am done.
off the roof.
As Pi walked to the door he also saw that night had fallen, the moon having turned a blood red for the first time in many years. As a possible omen of things to come, Pi simply ignored it. He opened the door, and he saw a large gaggle of Goths. It must have been the largest party of Goths in history. This, the night of the blood moon, was a sacred holiday for the Goths, and they took the occasion most seriously.
He eased his way into the club, sticking out from the sea of black clothing. The Goths stared menacingly at him, although none came forward, as Goths do not like to fight often. He made his way to the staircase, and punched the bouncer in the nose. The bouncer, whose name tag said Ted, slid to the ground to the fetal position.
Chapters:   « Previous 1 2 3 4


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This book has 8 comments. Post your own!

CarrieAnn13 said...
Sept. 27, 2011 at 2:34 pm:
This is interesting.  The character names are a bit ridiculous, but that's fine.  I didn't catch any major grammar/spelling errors either.  All in all, good job!
 
ArchimedesWhite replied...
Sept. 28, 2011 at 6:50 am :

Well, the names were supposed to be silly, to counteract the seriousness of some of the plotline...

In other words, my sister was giving us nicknames by asking us what our favorite animal is. I said zombie, so she said my nickname is Zom. I didn't like that, so i made it into Zom-Zom the zombie raver.

My friends said Panda (Pan), Pirate (Pi [yeah, he's a guy]), and vampire (Vamp).

Oh yes, when i  post the next part of the story, Vamp's name will be different. I have ... (more »)

 
ArchimedesWhite replied...
Sept. 28, 2011 at 6:53 am :

Hmm...

Seems that something odd happened when i last posted...

Either that, or i've gone insane again...

Oh well, i guess we'll never know. (Cackles malisciously)

 
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Garnet77 This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Sept. 1, 2011 at 4:05 am:
Hilarious and entertaining! I haven't quite finished this yet (I'm swamped with work), but I love what I've read so far. :)
 
ArchimedesWhite replied...
Sept. 1, 2011 at 8:52 am :
Thanks. I actually got the inspiration of this story from Vampire Club by Voltaire. Have you heard of it?
 
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Horrid_G said...
May 17, 2011 at 8:29 pm:
i liked it alot keep writing. also check out my book and give it some tips please
 
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DinoNugget said...
Apr. 28, 2011 at 7:54 pm:

This story is AWESOME!!!  I absolutely love it!  You are a fantastic writer.  Keep up the good work.  (Maybe check out by work?)  Write on!


-  Dino

 
ButterflyKiss replied...
Oct. 5, 2011 at 12:05 pm :
Ok this plot is just silly! xD It makes me smile! The names are kind of silly, but it makes the story even more entertaining to read! :) Keep on writing, my fellow INKIE!!!
 
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