My mom always says “Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.” A saying that has always stuck with me. According to Dictionary, to Forgive is “to stop feeling angry or resentful toward someone for an offense, flaw, or mistake.” In my opinion, it is much more than that. Forgiveness is ripping off the band-aid and not letting their mistake take over. It's letting their wrong doing be pushed away. Sometimes forgiving someone is letting that grudge go.
In my opinion,there are many types of forgiveness. One type is the kind you can easily get over. It's the fight you get in with your friend and you both say hurtful things. You both apologize, and it’s forgotten.
I have two siblings, I am the youngest of them. My brother is twelve years older than me, my sister only two years older. As I was growing up, my brother and I never fought, I think it's because of the age difference. My sister and I on the other hand have always fought. I remember as kids we would get into arguments and we would yell at each other and then minutes later we would be back to normal. That is what I call easy forgiveness.
Another type of forgiveness is the kind you will never forget about. It's the type of forgiveness that no matter how hard you try it will always hurt. The type that will shape you as a person.
When I was nine years old, my dad was in a deadly motorcycle accident. The girl who hit him was distracted and didn't see him. For years, I had bottled up all this hate towards her and I had let that hate take over my life. I was mean and had become good at pushing everyone who loved me in my life away. It wasn't until last year that I finally started the process of forgiving her. It’s not the type of forgiveness that I will forget. I will never fully forgive her, and I am okay with that.I have forgiven her to the point that I no longer push everyone away or bottle up all my emotions. I am able to live my life happy and not let her have control.
When I was ten I started seeing a therapist, he was there to talk. I had bottled up all these emotions inside of me and he helped me get some of them out. When I stopped going to therapy it was easy for me to bottle all my emotions back up again. I learned many things while going, forgiving is the most important. Years later when I was finally ready to start forgiving I went back to things he told me would help. I was very thankful for advice he had given me.
There is also forgiveness for betrayal, and lies. In my opinion this is where the saying “fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me” comes in. “Fool me once shame on you” this is the first time you are lied to, or betrayed. It’s your fault, but it is easier to forgive you. “Fool me twice shame on me” This is the second time you betray or lie to me. It is still your fault for doing it but it is also my fault for trusting that you won't do it again. The second time is hard to forgive you and often leaves permanent scars.
Trust and forgiveness go hand in hand with each other. The saying “fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me” portrays that very well. Forgiving someone is trusting that they are going to try and not do it again.
Forgiveness is hard and sucks, but it has helped me through the hardest time of my life. It has taught me many life lessons. Being able to forgive has turned angry, sad Grace into a happy, loving person. Bottling my emotions was no way to live and my life is much easier now that I have let those emotions go. Forgiveness has changed my life for the better, and I am very thankful for that.