Trying to Slow the PACE of My Heart | Teen Ink

Trying to Slow the PACE of My Heart

December 7, 2017
By KelseyGriffin BRONZE, Sllidell, Louisiana
KelseyGriffin BRONZE, Sllidell, Louisiana
2 articles 0 photos 0 comments

“Kelsey, you are an outgoing person. You will lead their morning stretches.” My heart sunk down to my stomach and my head sharply turns toward the voice to make sure I have heard her correctly. The teacher chaperone for my school’s service project day has just informed me that I will have to stand up in front of many strangers and peers to lead the stretches at the PACE center in New Orleans, Louisiana. Immediately, my body tenses up, and I feel sweat forming on my palms and running down my back. I nervously wipe my sweaty palms on my pants and tap my foot on the floor rapidly as I beg my teacher to choose someone else. She denies my request to pick another person, and she leads our group of students into the filled main room. While walking toward the main room, I try to calm myself and slow my breathing. As we approach the main room, calming myself down becomes almost impossible. I take a long, deep breath in another attempt to calm myself, and I walk to the center of the crowded room in the PACE center, while never lifting my eyes from my shoes. I look up to see rows of eyes staring back at me with judgement gleaming in them. I can practically hear their criticizing thoughts condemning my shy and awkward nature. My head snaps back down to my feet and I begin mumbling any exercises that I can think to say. Between the “uhm”s and nervous laughs, I do not know if anything literate came out of my mouth. “These stretches are weird. I can’t even hear her!” one lady yells out to me, and before I could process what she said, I hear, “These are not our normal stretches! What is she doing?” My eyes start to water as the men and women around me start to criticize me and tell me to speak up. I look up with my watery, pleading eyes toward my peers hoping someone will come to my rescue. They all avoid my gaze awkwardly, so they would not have be the next victim to lead the stretches. Finally a girl I recognize from my history class steps in and saves me by starting to lead the stretches for me with ease. I slowly step away from the center of the room and from the focus of the room, and I step back in line with the rest of the students from my school. Although this situation did not improve my fear of public speaking, my experience has made me realize that I want to face this fear. I realized that a part of growing up and a part of the real world is having interactions with groups of strangers. I learned that preparation before an event where I must speak in front of a group of people, helps calm my nerves and improve my presentation. Since my encounter with this group of elders, I have began to conquer this fear of public speaking through school presentations and joining the theater club. I will continue to work hard on surmounting this fear and bettering myself for the future.



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