What is going on? My hands are shaking and I can’t move. My breath is in short bursts but it feels as if i’m not breathing at all. I look at the ground and stare at it. Nothing is interesting about it but it’s better than looking around and getting dizzy. I hear my name being said but I don’t look up fearing I might be looking at fear itself. I can feel sweat rolling down my back. My vision is blurring. I hatch a plan in my mind to run out, but my feet feel as if they are glued to the floor, how can I run if i can’t even move my feet? In my mind I can only think about running out the door and leaving. I try to move my feet again and they move a bit, I lift them completely off the ground and grin a bit. Finally, I can leave. My heart is pounding more than it was before. I look up and I plan my escape to the point where no one can stop me. I get up and I walk. I walk as fast as I can to the point where i’m almost running. I see the door, my target, no one has stopped me yet. My heart feels like it’s in my throat. I reach the door and push. I’m free. I can feel the breeze on my face but I can’t stop to celebrate. I continue walking faster before I could get caught. I have made it halfway through the parking lot before I hear my name being called “damb” I hear myself say. I’ve been caught. I turn around and see them walking to me and I walk over. Looks like I have to try again tomorrow.
November 21, 2017