Till Death Do Us Part

October 10, 2017
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On the evening of October 21th, 1995, Mr. and Mrs. were wed for eternity, or so they thought. If only they newlyweds knew what had gone through both of their minds before they committed to a life based upon a lie. Not all promises end up lasting as long as hoped to, but underneath all of the regret and sorrow, some light can shed from fate. Friends and family gathered into the musty church, the air thickened with every passing minute. The chapel echoed with the lingering words from the ordain mouth, “To love and cherish, for better or worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health. From this day forward.”  A momentary pause of silence swept over the room as the crowd waited in agonizing suspense for  an answer from the bride to be. “I do.” My mom used to tell me that this was one of the best days of her life, other than the days my sister and I were born. I never really talked to my dad about his marriage with my mom, I’m not sure why. I guess all of my questions were answered by my mom. She told me stories about how they loved each other, but they had different morals, political views, and ways of raising their children, it made them grow to resent one another.


My mother is a woman of average height, with red locks that fall over her shoulders and choppy bangs that drape over her forehead. She finds humor in just about anything. My mother is the person you would come to whenever you need something, whether it be relationship advice, or simply balancing your checkbook. My father is around 5’9”, tan, and muscular in his arms. He owns his own carpet cleaning business so he is always doing physical labor. My dad is quite the jokester, but not with dad jokes. It’s usually something inappropriate, yet funny. If you knew my parents, you’d know that they are polar opposites. Sometimes opposites attract, but in their case, it pushes them further apart.


July 31st, 2003. Wine glasses shattered to the floor thrown in frustration. Irreversible words were uttered, silence was a figment of the imagination. Everything seemed to play out in slow-motion, all of the yelling and the shouting. Tears shed to the floor and struck the ground with the weight of a thousand more. It was heartbreaking. I was so young and so naive, I didn’t know what was happening. My parent’s divorce papers came in the mail. I always hear about the ugly sides of separation; all of the hatred and bitterness that comes with it. You never really hear about how good outcomes can appear. Most of the stories I’ve been told include court cases, split custody/visitation only, and a lot of arguing. My friend’s parents went their separate ways when he was around 15. His story is different than most are, his parents go on family cruises with their two children every couple years, while some cannot stand to be in the same room as one another. How can past love turn into present loathing for some and compatibility for others?

This simple gold wedding band symbolizes many things, heartache, family, and unity. This ring represents my mother and my father, vowing to love their family for the rest of their lives. This ring reveals the truth about life and the ups and downs that come with it. Marriage isn’t merely the joining of two people, but the promise to help one another out for as long as they both shall live, even if fate keeps them apart. My mother’s wedding band is the representation of family staying together no matter what comes their way, whether it be divorce, death, or disappointment. Not every happy ending is easily found; sometimes tragedy can bring upon happier lives.

 

Marriage is a funny thing. It is complicated, and means different things to different people. Some couples wait 10 years after dating and plan the most extravagant wedding with hundreds of people to admire. On the other hand, people meet at a bar and run off to get married in Las Vegas the next day.


People change, and it isn’t always a bad thing. Sometimes fate intervenes in the best way possible, pulling two people apart who weren’t meant to be together in the first place. Change could make life better for both parties in the long run. My mother's wedding ring is the biggest change in her life at the time. She went from raising her children with her husband, to living with only two others, and giving them away every other weekend. Through all of the struggle my parents endured, they loved my sister and I unconditionally. My family has grown now, adding on two more parents. Two more people who care deeply about you, two more people standing in the crowd, cheering, watching you succeed. The thing I carry is Christmas morning, waking up to see your mother and your step-father sitting by the tree waiting for my sister and I to wake up. The thing I carry is driving through the freshly fallen winter snow to see my father and step-mother cooking Christmas dinner to the tune of “Let it Snow.” I carry the feeling of separate yet togetherness, that my family is still my family no matter what.






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