Thanksgiving is the time of giving thanks, and celebrating and appreciating everything that you have. One weeks and two days before last Thanksgiving, my nana passed away. She battled cancer, she had been fighting it for a long time, but eventually cancer won. I had never experienced the loss of someone close to me before, so after she died, emotions that I had never felt before rose up, like air bubbles in water rising to the surface. Before she died, everyone, including all my family and doctors, said she only had a few days left to live. I didn’t believe them. It was too surreal, it was like I had to pinch myself just to know that this was actually happening. I thought it was just a nightmare. I thought my nana had more time to live. “She won’t die, God won’t let her.”, I told myself. I prayed that she would survive through the holidays and her birthday, but instead she died right before Thanksgiving.

I don’t typically show my emotions to others. I build a wall around myself and act as though I don’t get affected by anything. This time was different. I was filled with despair when I heard the horrible news that she passed away. I didn’t build my wall and keep away from others though, this time I broke down my wall. When she died, it seemed as though she took a piece of my heart with her. Nothing was the same without her, especially during the holidays. My nana stood out. She was the sun in our family. Without her, it was dark. It was always nighttime.