Why is it when we are little and young in age we ask so many different questions about the world around us, perhaps it is for the simple reason we do not know, but maybe it is for a more complex reason we do not know. During my childhood I often asked myself why I only take my mom with me everywhere I go. School parties, walmart,after school activities. It took me 15 years to finally realize that it is because my father chose not to have anything to do with me. He is the main reason I choose not to let people into my life. When I was younger I did not have many friends and I asked questions mentally all of the time. Still to this day I have one unanswered question and only one mortal soul can give me the answer I desire. “Why am I not good enough to be like everyone else?” I have finally formed my own version of his answer, the answer to my question is “You’re good enough, so good you do not need me.” Today I ask myself “Why do I have to make sure my future family has a father figure in their life, when I never needed one?” The answer I often give myself is “I have always been missing a piece to my life, and I do not want my kids to have to grow up to learn to put on the faces every morning, I want their faces to be of true content.
How Do I?
March 14, 2017