Is it bad for me to feel Guilt? Guilt from living? Guilt from being? Guilt from feeling guilty?

A lot of times Guilt comes afterwards, after I feel Hatred or Anger or Bitterness.

Most of the time though, the starting point is Jealousy: jealousy towards my sister for being prettier than me, smarter than me, and far more talented. Jealousy towards my friends for being more thin, more beautiful, more loved. Jealousy towards all the skinny girls whose thighs don't touch, whose arms don't shake, whose bellies don't bulge. Jealousy plants itself right into my heart and upon spreading, poisons my blood.

After that, Bitterness finds his way into my soul.

Next comes Anger, tempting me with his scissors.

..I use them on myself sometimes..

After Anger, Hatred knocks on the doors of my conscience and lets himself in.

Finally, I find Guilt waiting on my doorstep. 

I'm exhausted when he comes, but I still play host. It only seems appropriate that I let him stay with his friends.

Out of all my company, Guilt's visits are the longest.

They are also the ones I dread the most.

Bitterness, Anger, Hatred: their visits are tolerable.

It's Guilt who takes all the pain away, yet, at the same time, brings it all back.

Other times, Guilt comes to me directly, waiting for no one else.

When I think about myself and how much of a burden I must be on others' shoulders, I feel Guilt breathing on my own. 

When I think of myself and how much better I could've been, Guilt pushes me down. 

When I look in the mirror, Guilt makes me want to smash it.

When I ponder on how better the lives of my family and friends could've been if I wasn't here, Guilt makes me want to not be.

Live? Guilt is waiting for me at every opportunity.

Die? Guilt will be there to carry my angry soul away.

The only choice is to live without really living at all.

I am Jealousy.

I am Bitterness.

I am Anger.

I am Hatred.

I am Guilt.

Guilt and I are one.

Jealousy stops visiting me now. Bitterness stops coming. I no longer see Anger, but his scissors are always there. Hatred stops knocking on the door. Guilt does not sit at the doorsteps anymore. The house is empty.