“Mommy please!  She won’t leave me alone. Mommy why won’t she leave me alone… what have I done to her… please mommy just poison me”. I honestly don’t remember doing anything to her.  She ruined my life.

There is one name that I hate hearing, Elizabeth. She had me begging my mom to kill me… she made me feel worthless. She talked about my family, my friends, and anyone else who talked to me. I would be at the bus stop talking with my friends and she would come up to me and talk trash. I went from a talkative person to a quiet one, scared that if I talk then id end up with another Elizabeth. I was ashamed of who I was.

I was bullied by her for years. She has hit me and said horrible things to me almost every day. I wasn’t safe anywhere. She lived in my neighborhood, had the same bus stop, and hung out in the same park. I couldn’t escape. She hit me with sticks and constantly say my autistic niece is restarted and laugh about it. She destroyed me. The way I feel about myself isn’t the same. I don’t think I’m pretty anymore.

I had a recording of her bullying me at the bus stop. When I showed the principle he told me “if I ever see you again in my office for something like this you’re suspended”, all I did was hand him the recording of her bullying me. She got a slap on the wrist. I didn’t report her until a year later when I went to 6th grade. Every day for four months I was in the office writing my report on what she said and did to me. I got the same answer every morning “we’ll look into it”.  I was never talked to about it nor was she.

My school never supported me, never helped.  My mom and dad came to my school and demanded that they do something. They said I needed more help than they could provide. I ended up going to Rockford, it’s like a mental hospital but a little different.  Rockford didn’t help me. I was just another kid in the room. They said I was bipolar because it runs in my family. No one helped me. I just wanted her to leave me alone. Of course she didn’t, we even had the police involved since school wanted nothing to do with it.  They told her to leave me alone. That also didn’t help.

I saw what she did to my mom. My mom would cry every day because I would beg her to kill me or let me kill myself. I stopped telling her what Elizabeth did to me. I didn’t think it was fair to my mom. So I started experimenting on how to take the pain away. Started with an eraser, then it turned into a razor blade. My ‘friends’ turned on me, my teachers ignored my cries for help. I stopped telling my parents about what she did. I only trusted my razor. I still have some of the scars. 

Elizabeth messed up my view on life. I don’t see anything the same anymore. I can’t do any of the thing I used to do without thinking of what she has done. For years I was being brought down by her. I now know not to listen to people like her and to demand action if I’m not heard.