Validation is something we all need. Everyone needs to feel loved. But not everyone wants or even needs to be validated.
I hate being complemented. Being called cute, funny, it all get to me. In the worst way possible. If I’m funny, don’t tell me I’m funny. You laughing at my jokes says enough. When someone tells me that I’m funny, I feel as if I’m being held up to some standard. What if I stopped being funny? Would they not like me anymore? What if I stopped being cute? Would they not love me anymore? Sometimes it’s best to leave things unacknowledged.
I now realize that this is a destructive way of thinking.
To this day I still struggle with being complimented. They’re infrequent, but whenever I do receive one a side of me is extremely thankful while the other side feels a river of anxiety flowing down his spine. I can’t help but doubt myself. I can’t help but suspect them of lying to me.
I once told this girl that she was pretty. Not blatantly, however. I didn’t have the guts to do so. I asked her “Hey, do you want to see a picture of a pretty girl?” She said yes. And I proceeded to show here a picture of herself. She responded saying “I don’t need this”. She didn’t, to be frank. But I knew that was her little way of saying “thank you”.
Some people just need to learn how to take a compliment.
I am one of them.