Through my life friends have come and gone. For me relationships were confusing when it came to the emotions of my friends. I didn’t know how to make them happy. One of my old friends told me that if I had really done what I could do to help them, and they still didn’t listen to me that they weren’t real friends. His point was proven to me when the friends that I thought were important just left me. After a while, I learned how to get over these losses.
On September 9th 2007, I met my first friend. My first friend molded me into the emotional powerhouse I am. I met him over a conversation. We were having a lesson about just coloring inside the lines. I was the only one who couldn’t achieve it. At least that’s what I thought. Across the room someone shouted and walked to the back of the room to the bean-bag relaxing area. I noticed the boy and walked to the back of the room to talk to him. The teacher told me to sit back down and work, but then she noticed what I was doing and went back to working with a student. I asked the boy what his name was, but he didn’t answer. He instead buried himself in a pile of blankets.  I told him that it was alright and nobody was going to be mad at him. Despite his face dripping with tears he uncovered himself and told me his name was Carl. I told him that I couldn’t do the coloring either, and that I was also very frustrated. He acted like we were almost the same. To be honest, we acted almost the same. He said that he planned on hurting himself to get away from the sorrow. I told Carl that I was here for him and that I would help him when he needed it. The day I went to Carl’s house he acted like it was the best day of his life. We didn’t do anything special, just activities six year old kids would do. When I had to leave, Carl went into hysterics. He told me to come back anytime to visit. He also told me that if I never saw him again to look at a small car he gave me. I told Carl I would visit him again soon. I never saw him again for the rest of my life. I never got to teach him how to be self confident. As the year progressed, I didn’t know if he was alright.

The friend I made after Carl had left, I had made almost right after he did so. He has been with me since then. I met him when he brought a huge bin of toy trains to school. I had gone to the back of the room to wash my hands before playing with the trains. He approached me and asked me why I was washing my hands. I told him that I always wash my hands when I play with my trains back at home. He laughed and let me continue. When I was done, I asked him what his name was. He said his name was Matthew but I could call him Matt. I told him my name was Brian and that he could call me Brian. He laughed again and we played for the rest of the time.  Eventually in fourth grade, I met a new friend. Matthew and I had made a group structure where we take in new kids and be their friends until they find new friends. This boy was different, he stayed with us constantly until we started to realize we had made new friend. His name was Trevor. He always got hostile and when we were insulted by others. We respected his loyalty and treated him like a brother we never had. Whenever one of us stepped out of line he would do whatever he could to fortify our union.

It’s been a long time since we quarreled severely. Life was quiet and plain for years on end. We had fights every once in awhile. Nothing ever primarily broke our triforce. That was until she showed up. I was minding my own business and enjoying my life-long friendship, when I noticed a new girl. Trevor seemed very agitated about her being here. I asked him what was so wrong about the girl being here. He told me she was the one who influenced his recent breakup. He also told me her name was Destiny and that she had been in juvenile detention. Naturally my mind set itself to liking her. I thought all people could change. Eventually on a seemingly average afternoon, Skyler Wilson told me that Destiny wanted to go out. I was a bit surprised at first, but I said yes anyway and found a different type of friend. The type of friend that you never stay away from, and keep by you at all costs. Or so I thought. Eventually after there had been a while of miscommunication and anger, I noticed that Destiny didn’t like me anymore. Instead she started to hangout with Matthew. The next twenty-four hours were full of rage and misconceptions. After about a day, I yelled at Matthew and told him to stay away from me. Only mere hours after I had yelled at Matthew, I found out something devastating. Destiny had pushed over one of the teachers. The teacher must have called the police, because soon after I discovered that she had assaulted the officer. I was dumbfounded. I knew Destiny had some problems, But I never thought it would lead to hurting people.

After a couple days, I realized I would never see Destiny again. Just like I would never see Carl again. That was when I realized how much it really phased me. I knew that I would never see them again, and that was ok with me. I made more friends and more connections without them around. I realized that if I Kentucky going on that I will make new friends or make stronger connections with the friends I already have rather than being in silent sorrow. Instead I will thrive and do more than I ever have before to keep my old friends and unlock every secret. Whatever it takes to take my mind away from the past, I will do. I can get over these lost connections.

These old friends are now rarely thought about. My life has been warped for the better because of my willingness to overcome the loss of my friends. It wasn't hard forgetting about the sorrow of old friends. I was always worried because of what the friends themselves might have been thinking about me. Did they think I was a horrible person? Will they be mad at me if I don't do something to help them? Maybe I don't need their opinions.Although they had been some of the most important people in my life, I didn't need the extra self pity. I'm my own person and it was there fault they never showed up. I look back at the moments I was in sorrow and just laugh. Overcoming these relationships made me stronger than I ever was. Not having a single thing to drag me down. I cried a massive river, built a mighty bridge, and got over it.