I was that odd child in the back of the room in strawberry pants and a race car shirt. Yeah, I was a strange child. Obviously not the best dressed. My mom let me dress myself when all the other little girls had their moms make them look like models. That’s why I'm so independent.
That led me to be a bright child though. I was the only one thinking outside AND inside the box. I was logical yet creative. Every child probably played with legos at one point in time. I know I did. I found myself “logically” following the directions, but then taking some apart and adding my own creative twist to the design. Currently, I am an over-achieving, try hard, perfectionist. I am a person who needs to not only look at something working, but understand how it works and why. You cannot just tell me that a car goes because of the engine, I need to know WHY the engine makes the car move. My mom always tells me I’m doing more than I need to. Well duh. I know I am. I have to take the long way. I love short cuts, but all it does is leave me in question. I need explanations and true understanding because that’s how my brain works.
I am a stress case. That comes with being a perfectionist. I tend to find myself trying to make everything perfect, which only leads to stress. I find myself up late, doing my best to make what I do the most perfect I possibly can. I’ll sit in a chair for 4 hours trying to get a playing test perfect, when in all reality,I could have finished with it in 30 minutes.
I do however have a skill set that a lot of perfectionists don't. I am a loud person when I want to be and a quiet person when I want to. Most peorfectionist I see, tend to be so focused on their work that they don’t notice the world around them. I will come up with comebacks on the spot that will make people laugh, but I will also stay quiet when we are working. For me, being social is a necessity. I'm bored without other people around. Helping someone in need of a smile is one of my favorite things.
I’m not one to allow rudness or teasing. I’m the type of person who will stop someone from talking if they are being rude. Afraid to call someone out? Nope. I will turn it into a scene if you let me. There is absolutely no reason to be cruel toward someone and that is my biggest pet peeve. One of the most cliche sayings of all time is,“If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” I have, and am not afraid to say that to someone, if I feel them being cruel
I believe self worth is everything. Being one who used to struggle with this myself, I constantly feel the need to make sure others feel good about themselves. The person I was, and having the traits I do, led me to be the person I am today. Becoming who I am meant to be is a constant challenge, but I’m working on it.