Paused | Teen Ink

Paused

November 19, 2014
By Italiano GOLD, Central Point, Oregon
Italiano GOLD, Central Point, Oregon
12 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"The woman who follows the crowd will usually go no further than the crowd. The woman who walks alone is likely to find herself in places no one has ever been before."-Albert Einstein


My face slammed against the water with a shocking thud. A soft ringing sensation echoed in my ears, and my jaw tensed up. I struggled to breathe, gasping for air, and I wheezed in my failed result. Shriveled, I laid in pain atop the solid surface beneath me. I’ve never fallen so far onto something so hard before. I winced and raised my body upright until I was sitting on the rock hard surface beneath me. The ringing in my ears ceased and I was able to open my eyes. Light shone down through the cracks of the wooden planks above me and revealed the water that I was sitting on. I was directly beneath the Meadow Bridge where a seven foot deep creek was present, yet I hadn’t fallen through the water. I looked down at my hands holding me upright and beneath my feet; the creek was solid, and even the small fish within the water didn’t move. I stood up more confused than ever. Is this a dream? I looked at the trees: not a single leaf rustled, no chirps were heard, squeaks from squirrels were absent, and birds were frozen in place in the vast blue canvas of the sky. People stopped walking in the middle of their steps, and ripples in the water ceased to expand. The sun sat high overhead and the clouds didn’t move. Every aspect of the world as I saw it was lifeless, frozen. Time was stopped, and the world fell silent. I walked to the edge of the creek onto the solid sand; not a single sand particle shifted under my steps. I reached a point at which it was possible to see the whole park. Everything was still; even the sideway-blown grass refused to return to its normal vertical stance. The realization hit me: This was a warp in time, and I was paused.
At first, being stuck in this warp of time was fun, adventurous, and exciting. But, after being paused in 2014 for six ongoing years, with no human interactions mind you, I was becoming overwhelmingly lonely. For six years I listened, and there was nothing but silence filling lifeless space in paused time. Every now and then to amuse myself I would shout over the mountains, “Echo! Is anyone there?” After six years of even that, listening to my voice echo off buildings for five minutes, it became boring and tiresome. I missed being hugged, I missed being talked to, and I missed the world. I was frozen in the ice of time, and no one was there to chisel me out. I sat on the edge of a king size bed overlooking a permanent sunset in melancholy. The wind shook the leaves and curled the ocean’s beautiful, sparkling, blue water into paused blissful waves. It shifted the sand in different directions and blew against the cotton candy clouds, yet I felt nothing in this paused warp. Am I going to be stuck here forever? Will I die here? Can I die here? Stuck in time, yet somehow able to move, I wandered this planet aimlessly looking for answers, yet everything stayed the same. I never aged, I never got hungry, and my physical conditions never changed. I should have appreciated life before it suddenly stopped. It’s hard to think that I didn’t always feel like this constantly, alone and in melancholy. Things used to be different and full of living, breathing people and organisms. This all started on the incident at Meadow Bridge, and I wish that I could go back.
 

 

The incident occurred on a Saturday like any other, starting with my usual walk through the Meadow Park. The grey concrete pathways paved my journey throughout the two mile walk entwining within the park. Speckled with dirt on its outside borders, I walked on the path taking in my scenery. The birds around me chirped and sang their melodies to the harmony of the trees’ rustling leaves. This joyous song engulfed me and brought a smile to my face. I looked around and saw the soft, sweet, and slender green grass swaying in the wind. Children’s laughter was heard through the small rolling hills of the park. They echoed in sweet innocent bursts of, “Tag, you’re it!” and “Let’s play again!” It was a beautiful sunny day with a bright, blue sky over head speckled with fluffy gentle clouds. As I neared the Meadow Bridge in my walk, the smell of flowing running water from the creek filled my nose. The freshness of the air and sounds of flowing water refreshed me once I came onto the bridge. The wooden planks creaked under my feet like the squeaks of tiny mice. I leaned against the waist-high railing facing the creek. The trickling water filled my ears and soothed my thoughts while I briefly closed my eyes. I only wanted a quick break. Off in the distance I heard the buzzing and ticking of a bicycle’s wheels approaching. The sound became louder and louder and I finally opened my eyes: a very determined and enraged cyclist entered the bridge. I turned towards the inside of the bridge so I was able to see the situation. With furrowed eyebrows he wore a scowl and intensified expression as he pumped his legs to get the bike to move faster. Letting out large exhales and deep breaths, he seemed completely oblivious and didn’t take notice of my presence, therefor causing him to be in a path of collision with my feet. So close that I could see the sweat forming under his brow and the hairs on his arms standing up, I jumped back. The forceful wind and ticking sound of the passing biker nearly punched me in the face. I overestimated my distance between myself and the railing and I swung over the border of the bridge. I quickly inhaled as I felt my feet lift off of the ground and my body fall; the world spun and blended into a single color of a blue intertwined with brown and grey. In my fall, I thought to myself, I shouldn’t get hurt, I will just fall through the water, yet I was completely wrong.
After the realization of the discovery of this time warp and my situation, I decided enjoy this pause in time. I took advantage of my opportunities and explored the world, looking and seeking adventurous fulfillment. Although it took me a while to get from destination to destination, I was able to do it all. I stood in the Amazon and looked up as the rain droplets refused to fall. I touched the teeth of tigers, held wild monkeys, and stroked my fingers through a lion’s mane. I was able to walk across the Red Sea and sit in the royal throne of England. I attempted to kick a football goal in Brazil and the next month climb to the top of the Egyptian pyramids. I didn’t need to sleep, and with six years, I managed to explore and do it all. After settling down, I found my new home on the California shore where a permanent sunset sat over the horizon. It was a beautiful, vast, orange, pink, and purple sky that could be seen from giant windows across my bed in which I never slept in. I have the world at my fingertips just sitting, waiting for me to explore every aspect of it. Yet, even after doing everything, I’m not happy.
Some days, out of boredom, I would walk across the Los Angeles beaches and try to interact with strangers. I never approached the violent looking ones or the ones whose faces were filled with discern, for they scared me. Occasionally I would pretend to be in a volleyball game with strangers, trying to have some kind of interaction with other humans. They say that it is unhealthy to be unsocial; am I going crazy? I gave strangers names and talked to them frequently as if I knew them my whole life. Of my favorite strangers was Ben, whom I’ve labeled as a shy intellectual guy, and I treated him as my best friend. Ben, just an ordinary human, permanently sat on an old bench overlooking the sunset. Wearing black and white striped board shorts with a light blue tank top, he always had a contemptuous expression on his face. This action less, frozen person kept me company, but it only drove me into further delirium. I had to find a way back to normal life; I was determined.
After six years driven to a lonesome insanity, I retraced my steps to the origin of the situation. With faded, manic memory, it took me a few weeks until I remembered where Meadow Park even was. But, I eventually found my way to my destination, standing on the Meadow Bridge. Everything was the same, nothing had changed. Even the speeding biker was still there, stuck at the end of the bridge. Silence filled the beautiful park. No movement was seen and nothing was heard. How can I get back, how can I resume time? Should I repeat everything I did? Will that reverse the process? I was willing to do anything, so I decided to fall from the railing of the bridge again. Somehow, I managed to expect to fall into water and for everything to be fine, but I was wrong again. I opened my eyes in enraging pain to see I was still lying atop solid water. Is there some sort of lever I have to pull? Is there a secret undo or a red escape button? While I laid sprawled across the water, I looked around and under the bridge only to find that there was no obvious escape. There’s no hope, I’m stuck here forever! I sat up, my head still throbbing, and cried. My soft sobs echoed off the boards of the bridge until they lingered away. I stood up and began to hobble off onto the solid sand when I gave one last look at the bridge. Then I had a thought. What if I did things in reverse, would that solve things? I gimped back over to the bridge where I originally fell off. The distance between my outstretched and raised arms and the ledge of the bridge was about two feet, meaning that I originally fell from the top of the bridge about ten feet until my face hit the ground. I gathered myself together and jumped with all of my might. I let out a large gasp as my fingertips grasped the ledge of the bridge. Wood slivers slid into my palms as I tried to readjust my grip. My feet dangled and I could myself slipping. Enough is enough and I can’t stay here any longer. With an adrenalin rush to aid me, I pulled myself up until I could grab the railing. I reached one foot atop the bridge and dragged the rest of my body along with it. Still on the outside of the railing, I swung forward to get back on top of the bridge. I was exhausted. With a distinctive thud, I fell over and laid flat on the bridge. With my eyes closed, I tried to catch my breath and slow my heartbeat. I held my hand over my heart and felt the beats move my chest up and down. Then suddenly I heard something, a tweet? It was followed by another, and the sound of leaves rustling in the wind filled my ears. I opened my eyes and sprang to my feet. Tears of joy filled my eyes as I saw movement, heard laughter, and felt the wind. My lower lip quivered. I’m alive and in the living, breathing world. All time had resumed and nothing had changed. People continued their steps and strolls through the parks and talked with companions who had smiles on their faces. I see everything in a new way, with much more appreciation and beauty. I have never felt more alive. I continued my walk through the park, but I will never forget when everything was forever paused.



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This article has 1 comment.


81randy said...
on Dec. 4 2014 at 10:49 pm
This is amazing!!