I’ll never forget the day I lost my best friend. As I sat on the ground holding my sweet, innocent, brown eyed dog I began to realize that I only had a matter of minutes before saying goodbye. I wrapped my hands around her plush face. Her once jet black fur had faded and had become gray over the years. Her nose was moist, whiskers were short, and her eyes were cloudy but they still captivated me.  I closed my eyes trying to avoid what was soon to come. Memories from the past fourteen years began to rush through me.
       When I was three my mother and I would visit Earl May to look at the animals since I was an only child and had no pets. One day a worker had approached us saying that she had found a stray dog and was going to take her to the animal shelter if she could not find a home for her. We agreed to babysit the dog to get a feel for her. When we picked her up, we instantly fell in love. She was a beautiful collie mixed with black lab. At the time her name was Hope. She greeted us with excitement and her joy was illuminating. The first day at our house she tore everything up. We would put her in the basement when we left the house but she would scratch at the door for us to come and get her. To this day scratch marks are still visible. My parents were unsure if we should keep her because henever I was around she would bark loudly. They were worried for my safety, but they found out she really only wanted to play with me. After spending time with Hope, we decided to adopt her. Instead of keeping her name we changed it to Shadow because everywhere you went, she would follow.  
      From the first day we had her, Shadow and I became best friends. Living in the country there were not many families around and there was certainly no children so I would spend my time playing with Shadow. This consisted of running around the house loudly and playing hide-and-go-seek until we both became tired. I also liked playing dress up so I thought Shadow would too. I would take clothes and put them on her and parade around the house.
     My mom and I would always take Shadow on walks. I could never walk her alone because I was only five at the time, but my mom would let me take her outside to go to the bathroom as long as I held her leash tight. I decided to walk Shadow around the yard a little after taking her out. A short while later, she had noticed a bunny and instantly took off. Doing as my mom said, I held onto the leash as hard as I could. I was running as fast as I could to keep up with her, but she was too fast so ended up falling. There I was getting pulled across the yard flat on my stomach for several moments until I finally let go. I ran inside telling my mom that I had lost Shadow. My mother and I sprinted outside yelling for her to come home. After unsuccessfully catching the bunny, she finally came back home. Shadow was notorious for chasing bunnies and deer. We once lost Shadow for eight days because she wouldn’t come back after chasing a deer. Another time she got loose and when she came back she was completely green from being covered in cockleburs. I thought it was hilarious because my mom let her outside without a leash and I knew that she was going to have to try and get them out, but she told me that I had too. I was livid because it took hours to try to brush out all the cockleburs. Once I got the majority out we gave her a haircut.
     One of the things Shadow hated was thunderstorms. Whenever there was a storm she would shake and hide. At the time, my bed was high up off the ground which made it hard for her to jump onto at night. I decided to move my bed to the floor so she could sleep with me during the night. Even when there wasn’t a storm I would always walk into my room and see her sleeping in the middle of my bed. I enjoyed her company, but she wouldn’t move an inch for me so that I could lay down next to her. After having my bed on the floor for several years I finally moved it back onto the bed frame.
      Shadow’s favorite season was winter. My backyard was perfect to sled at so Shadow would join me and we would have a race down the hill. She loved playing in the snow and would always try to eat it.
      On November 18th my mom and I were in the family room with Shadow. I was on the floor laying next to her. We were discussing how much longer we would have with Shadow. I brought it up because a few of my friends had recently named her Hellen Kellar because she was losing her hearing and her sight. That day at school one of my classmates had told me to “just be prepared”.  We were unaware that our time was ticking up. That night I went up to my room to do homework. A couple hours later I heard bustling going on downstairs. I decided to check it out and I found my mom holding Shadow who was having a seizure. In the past Shadow had had many seizures due to her dog food, but she had not had any in several years. This time I knew something was wrong. I sat next to Shadow and my parents told me it was time to take her to the vet.  
      After several moments I began to come back to reality. Tears streaked down my face, my hands shook, and my heart raced. Fear was vivid on Shadow’s face. I leaned down to kiss her forehead and say goodbye. I slowly carried her to the car to be taken to the vet. I closed my eyes in disbelief and regret. I regretted not spending as much time with her when I started getting older. I tried to imagine my life without her, but I couldn’t because she has been in it as long as I can remember. As the car was finally out of sight I let out a deep breathe stumbling over the words “goodbye Shadow”. Losing Shadow was the hardest moment in my life. There has not been a single day when I have not thought about her. Shadow will always hold a special place in my heart.