My Loss

August 30, 2013
myIt was a bright day the sun was out and there wasn’t a single cloud in the sky. I was face timing my friend Hayden, when my dad called me down. As I walked down the brown carpeted stairs my dad told me the awful news that my god dad was dead at first I thought it was a joke. Then I looked into my dad's teary hazel eyes and I knew right then and there it was real, but I still couldn’t believe it. I tried to run up the stairs but I slipped and fell onto the floor sobbing and screaming. In my head all I could think was no he's not dead he cant be gone who will I hug every thanksgiving who will I tell every year that my birthday is a few days away, who will I ask to sit by to hold their hand during prayer I'll never forget asking him all these things and now they are just memories lost in my mind. Then I finally got up of the carpeted stairs and slowly made my way back to my room,where there was Hayden still on my iPod screen and me who just sat there motionless. When finally he asks," What happened are you ok?" I told him what happened and then hung up I couldn’t stand to face him nor anyone at this time. I just sat there on my big soft bed and cried my eyes out with nothing in my mind except for what just happened I'm trying to process it all,but it wont go through I was still thinking of how I would see him for Thanksgiving but I wouldn’t and I cried even more. When the day came of his funeral I just sat in the car driving and driving which seemed to take forever. When we finally got there I started to cry, but held it in so we entered the big church and as I saw everyone and hugged them and felt there warm embrace,I couldn’t help but let it all out I wanted to scream I wanted to cry for days on end, but I couldn’t I had to stay strong. Once we got started as I walked down the long black aisle of the church crying and sobbing we came to a stop and sat in the long brown pew the mass started. All I could hear was the loud sobs of all my hurt family members trying to let there screams out as well as mine. As soon as the mass ended I just sat there emotionless not a movement nothing then I realized it was over and I had to leave.

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