I just wanna make a change

August 23, 2013
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"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." - Dr.Seuss

Everyday that passes by I wonder, Who am I? What's my role in this big sea of lost souls? Will I ever achieve something? That's why I started this journey, to find the purpose of my life.

I want to change the world, but first I need to change myself; maybe if I'm fake I'll trick the world but never my heart . That's why I need to overcome my fears, things that hold me down, that way I'll be able to go through life without failing. I have to release all of my inner demons and get the angels in. My family it's a little torn in so many ways, that's why I learned this bad habit, not to trust anyone. Since I feel that I can't trust my own family I started to write. At first it was just for me, to help me move on, but now that I have moved on, I want to let people know my points of views and how I really feel. Every time I write I'm putting my heart on the line, showing all of my hidden emotions. I was afraid to show it aloud because of my "lack of courage". I realized that I didn't have lack of courage; I just needed to express myself in a different way; not through voice but through words. When I discovered that, I began to write, letting every single story get out. I don't let people bring me down, that's why I write with courage, to let those bad feelings out and don't get myself trapped. Now that I can express myself, I feel free. I don't feel the weight on my shoulders. Since that day, courage became a part of me; a value that I need in my life. Also, courage is giving me the strength to keep fighting, it helps me to hold strong and learn from my mistakes. Without courage I wouldn't be able to show you my feelings.

Furthermore when I'm feeling broken I look to God. He always shows me or puts a person on my path that helps me to get through darkness. Sometimes I go to the Bible and read some verses that I find interesting and learn from them; that way my hope begins to burn bright again. Gaia is one of my favorite persons, she helps me a lot. When I don't want to talk with anyone (besides God) I just go to her. I know that she won't judge me, but only help me. I just sit there; empty every single thing I feel. Similar to God, she sends me a signal, a little thing, that way I know she heard me and will help.

My favorite way to show people my affection is in poems, for some people poems are the most difficult way to express themselves, but for me it comes naturally. I love poems because I get to be dramatic, use some cool metaphors, and really big words that have deep meaning. I really can't talk about my personal experiences, they're too personal. Some people identify with my poems, and that's the point. You just need to read my poems and you will understand why I am, who I am.

Now that I have changed, I learned to trust not only me, but everyone else. Since I trust myself I can trust others and help them. Besides learning from writers, I have also learned from music to accept myself and be brave enough. Music inspired me to do my writing. It helps me, because I see how artists write about their lives, how they help people through it; so I decided to do the same. Now, I am trying hard to do my best. Through writing, I'm showing people that someone other than them has also been hurt. They're not alone in their fight, they just need to have someone to look up to, some one that gives them hope. I chose to be that person, the one that helps them achieve what they're fighting for, the one that stands by them.

When I write, I aim for the underdog; they're the ones that need the most help. I try to make them understand that they need to be themselves, show their true colors. If you live someone else’s life, you'll be lost. Reaching to people’s heart is very difficult but I need to be as straight as possible. Every time I write I give myself to them. Being honest is the most important thing I need to be; if I'm dishonest, how will I gain their trust and hope? By letting them know that I am a human being just like them, I'll make people understand that we all make mistakes and we don't need to have grief inside. We need to learn from our mistakes, forgive ourselves and move on; if not the ship will sink.

When I see a situation I write about it; that way humanity will know that I care for it. A technique that I use a lot is empathy; I try to get in their shoes. I "feel" what they feel, their problems. In other words I become the hurt one. I fight beside them until we have cut off the head of the problem; I don't give up. When I start to help I never back off, even though you may want me to. I am there for a reason, to help you, when you don't find the will to fight or go on, I'll do it for you. Also, I try to be the best example to the world, that way they'll look to me and want to be like me.

Ever since I was a little kid I have desired to be a person who will help the world. Now that I have grown up, I see how morbid the world truly is; my fate is to heal the world. Like I said, if I don't work hard enough I won't be successful. I'll fight for my dreams to show the world what I'm made of. I don't possess many talents, but I don't need lots of them. I just need paper and ink, to make people find a reason to fight and to stand on the right side. I don't need to be the greatest writer nor famous, I just need to make a change and leave my footprint.

"Listen to your heart, you will understand." - Pocahontas

I Am

I am brave and I'm a dreamer

I wonder why people hate
I hear the world asking for help
I see the world without wars
I want the people together as one

I am brave and I'm a dreamer

I pretend that I don't care
I feel the pain of losing who I am
I touch the possibilities I can't see
I worry about nature and families that are in grief
I cry because the world is not the same way it was before

I am brave and I'm a dreamer

I understand as long as we're alive we can fight
I say if we don't let go of the past we'll sink
I dream that wars will be fought with hugs
I try to make you understand that we can change
I hope this is just the beginning

I am brave and I'm a dreamer

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