One Like Me

June 18, 2013
One like me.

I never seen one before. One like me. Same color, same hair, same dark warm eyes. Shocked, I stared at him. I thought I was the only one. The only one with chocolate color skin, chocolate color eyes, corse twisty hair. But I guess not.

This is my daughter, Carly, my dad introduced me. I hid behind my dad, my white chocolate dad as this dark chocolate man waved at me. Hello Carly, Im Dr. Kwesi. Nice to meet you. He talked funny. Daddy why does he talk funny?, I asked stepping out from behind my dad. He has an accent because he’s not from here, my dad told me. He’s from Africa.

I look like him. Am I from Africa too? My dad and the dark man laugh. No, your not, my white chocolate dad smiled at me.

But he’s one like me. I look like him. But I don’t talk funny so I must not be from Africa. Where am I from them? Are there other people like me?

Dark chocolate man would talk to me. About who I was. I was milk chocolate, I knew that because my white chocolate mom told me. I wasn’t white chocolate like mom and dad, but I wasn’t dark chocolate like the dark man.

Mommy where do milk chocolates come from? All around, she says to me. But mommy, I whine back, dark chocolates that talk funny come from Africa. White chocolates come from America. Where do milk chocolates come from? She just looks at me sadly.

I still haven't met one like me. A milk chocolate. One that doesn’t talk funny, but doesn’t look like a white chocolate. One like me.

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This article has 4 comments. Post your own now!

E.J.Mathews This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 30, 2013 at 2:01 pm
I really liked this story after I figured out what it was about. I had to re-read a few paragraphs before everything was clear to me. I really liked the basic story, but I think that you could improve it if you changed the way you described color a little better. I don't mean you should re work the child says, that is all very good, but If you started out by giving more solid descriptions, it would really help the reader. Overall, I enjoyed looking over this piece. If you read it again a few... (more »)
Carly_Elizabeth replied...
Jul. 31, 2013 at 5:15 pm
Thanks for reading and for the tips. Means a lot. 
WriteOrWrong said...
Jul. 23, 2013 at 3:27 pm
I adore this! I love how it incorporates the innocence and curiousity of a child. One thing I really encourage you to add is quotation marks because they make reading dialogue a lot easier. It would clear up some confusion. Initially I thought you were being introduced to your daughter by your dad so that unnecessary confusion could be avoided with quotation marks.  *coarse As I suggest to everyone, just reread your piece again and see if there is anyway to clarify your message, reduce redu... (more »)
Carly_Elizabeth replied...
Jul. 24, 2013 at 12:17 pm
Haha thanks for reading it. And the quotation marks thing that is jus thow my writing teacher taught me how to write a vingette. I just never reallly thought it would all be confusing, but thank you for telling me that. I'm glad you liked it!
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