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Home Alone This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.

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The sky was pitch black, the house was creaking, and I still had four hours until my parents got home. Locked in my parents’ room, I turned on the TV full blast so I wouldn’t hear the creaking house.

I barely heard the phone ring. I picked it up and said, “Hello … hello …?” but there was no response. I knew someone was on the other end. Finally, I hung up. A minute later, the phone rang again; still no one was there. I became more frightened as time passed; the same ­person called five more times.

At this point I didn’t bother picking up, but the ringing continued. To get my mind off this prank caller, I called my friend. She told me not to worry and to turn the phone off. As we talked, I heard someone pull into the driveway. When I peeked out the window, I saw an unfamiliar car.

Thirty minutes passed and the car was still in my driveway. It drove up and down the drive as if aware I was watching. My friend told me to call the cops, but I refused.

Soon the phone calls started again. I heard noises in the background, but I couldn’t tell what they were. I really didn’t want that person to get out of the car and start toward the house. If they did, I didn’t know what I’d do. None of the doors were locked, and I would have no way of protecting myself. The only thing I could do was hide, which wasn’t a very good plan.

At this point I was considering calling the cops, but my friend offered to drive by. “Maybe if they see me pull in, they will leave,” she suggested. By the time she arrived, the car had left. The phone rang again and I picked up, thinking it might be my friend. Someone on the other end said “Bye-bye.”

At that point I wasn’t as scared as curious. Since then I have not stayed home alone and I probably never will.

This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. This piece has been published in Teen Ink’s monthly print magazine.




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This article has 337 comments. Post your own!

ShiGui said...
Nov. 11, 2010 at 10:11 pm:
Maybe it was a thing that your friend showed up at the right time. Who know what they could have done. I wouldn't want to be home alone after reading this.
 
WickedlyLove replied...
Nov. 25, 2010 at 8:48 pm :
I think we replied to the wrong comment....sorry...ShiGui
 
fashionluvr16 replied...
Nov. 26, 2010 at 11:41 am :
yep we did!! Yea sorry ShiGul!!!
 
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LastChapter said...
Nov. 11, 2010 at 9:25 pm:
when you said that an unknown prankster/anonymous murderer had whispered "bye-bye" to you over the phone, I was shocked. that's an interesting climax to your story of suspense, and you should've taken advantage of that. You could've added more to it then just cutting it off with your summary sentence of 'lesson learned'. fear was everything in this story, and you snapped away all the mystery by assuring us you got out scot-free, the only harm done being the resentment of alone time at ... (more »)
 
T.R.Trevino replied...
Feb. 12, 2011 at 5:34 pm :
Well, she can't actually changed what happened. I'm just glad the guy meant 'bye-bye' as in, he was leaving, not 'bye-bye' as in, she was dead.
 
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-DreamForever- said...
Nov. 3, 2010 at 9:07 pm:
The story was well-written and suspenseful, but I felt it ended too abruptly.  It was edge-of-your-seat material, though.  Good work.  
 
Brook_little_obbsessive replied...
Nov. 3, 2010 at 11:21 pm :
I agree with it ending so quick like that!
 
Jillian F. replied...
Nov. 5, 2010 at 9:48 am :
I agree with both of you guys the descriptions were great but then it tries to teach a lesson at the end. Was that what you were going for?
 
brEEzyBri replied...
Nov. 10, 2010 at 12:27 pm :
It was good but i could have a more "smooth" ending. I thought that something was really going to happen. The body was good but the ending...not so much.
 
wowwww replied...
Dec. 20, 2010 at 9:56 am :
the story isent supose to be milked the story is something that really happened its not a book to read if you want something terrifieing to happen go get a book from the library
 
manomanim sexy replied...
Mar. 15, 2011 at 12:59 pm :
i like it alot
 
Imperfectlife replied...
Oct. 21, 2011 at 10:38 pm :
Hey! I'm just glad she's safe. It does not need about the ending. I mean what if she gotten in real danger? Seriously, thinking about the ending is the last thing I would do when someone is in my driveway.
 
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Kiiiidii. said...
Oct. 27, 2010 at 3:00 pm:
I think that your way of telling the story was good, good grammar. But i think it was kinda lame, cause i mean, all you had to do was lock the doors. not hide. Sooo yeah, and this happends to anyone. Just sayin!
 
-DreamForever- replied...
Nov. 3, 2010 at 9:08 pm :
I agree. It was well written, but not a good choice in a story. 
 
AaronLawrence replied...
Nov. 3, 2010 at 9:32 pm :
The point is its nonfiction so its true, he had no 'choice' in stories. 
 
-DreamForever- replied...
Nov. 6, 2010 at 7:10 pm :
I get that, but no one ever said he had to write a story on that particular subject. 
 
Miss_Bliss replied...
Jan. 30, 2011 at 1:13 pm :
I actually thought that it was an incredibly good subject for a story (mysterious prank caller, unknown car idling outside your house, your doors are unlocked...). However, I wholeheartedly agree with LastChapter and -DreamForever-. You can milk a story without taking away the truth in it, and I think it would have been a good idea to try and enhance the suspense (with that in mind).
 
Miss_Bliss replied...
Jan. 30, 2011 at 1:17 pm :
Oh, I mean I agree with -DreamForever- that it ended too abruptly, not that it was bad subject material.
 
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pandiibearr said...
Oct. 18, 2010 at 12:33 pm:
this was a very creepy storyy but i likeedd it.(: 
 
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thestorycritic said...
Oct. 16, 2010 at 12:36 pm:
Wow. That was scary *shudder*
 
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Happyface:) said...
Oct. 13, 2010 at 5:38 pm:
Well written! This was gripping and I was curious about what your curiosity is, but you didn't say it.
 
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