Things Nobody Will Tell You (Except for me)

August 25, 2012
As you grow older, there are lessons you will learn. If you haven't yet learned this, you are just a spec that is just after the pre-pubescent blip on the map that is life. The important lessons are never easy. Saying that they are obstacles is a grand understatement; they are more like mountains to climb over, canyons to climb through, and sometimes even suns to extinguish. Seeing as how I am growing old even as I write this, I'll be the first one to tell you that learning the important lessons will never be easy. You will never discover a new concept that is mind blowing and strange and become excited to grasp it, and sometimes trying to prove that statement wrong is like being a rodeo clown in a stampede. There are large lessons that will hit you relentlessly without remorse like tidal waves. There are no relief funds in every day life. There are not charities for your self esteem, crowds of supporters rooting for your self worth, or campaigns to end your self loathing. Sometimes, all that you have is the wreckage and all you can do is scour the rubble. Sometimes that's the hardest lesson to learn and not many adults are willing to admit that to you. However, from one adolescent to another, I will tell you things I learned the hard way that will hopefully help you as much as they've helped me.

1.) LOVE AND THE BLUNDERS THAT ACCOMPANY IT:
Your first love will be beautiful. You will never meet another human being that will seem that flawless. You remember your first love, don't you? That kiss rocked the ricketier scale to a solid 9. Those eyes could stop the rain, freeze a fire, rearrange a molecule. You've never felt a touch like that, have you? The loyalty was astronomical, and if it had to have a number, it would beat the denomination of stars in the milky way. Every night for months you dreamed of this person, and your dreams didn't stop when you woke. A house, a family, a future, a love that would never stop for anything... But it did stop; eventually the dreams came to an end, the stars all burned out, the touch faded, your earthquake shelter collapsed on top of you, those beautiful eyes closed, and slowly you tried to forget your very first love. The terrible, painful, brutal truth is that you will never forget that person. You may forget the good feelings, or if you're lucky, perhaps the name. But even when you're 98, you will still remember the way they smelled, or the sound they made when they blew their nose. Wow. What a downer. It's hard to not feel a desperate need for somebody you feel so much towards. But you went how many years without them prior to this? 15? 16? You can do it again. You're still breathing air and waking up every morning. Nobody will ever tell you that you will learn to live without them again, but you will.

2.) SCHOOL STRESS:
You have at least 12 years of this to go through. I won't bother going in depth with this one because I know that everyone's had to do it before. Many people carry too much stress because of school. The cold truth is that not every teacher is an active learner themselves. Sometimes, sadly, people don't do their jobs. Have you ever gone out to eat and had an order botched up terribly? Perhaps you got a free salad out of it? Unfortunately, teachers sometimes botch orders, too. However, you will not get any free things out of it except perhaps a stress blemish or two. Maybe, if you're lucky, a bathroom break. Nobody will ever tell you that not everybody will do a good job and that sometimes it's your job to deal with it.

3.) DISCRIMINATION:
With a heavy heart, I will tell you that you will be discriminated against. Your build, body, gender, sex, religion, color, sexual orientation, height, weight, or even your brand of shoe will not prevent this. Ironically discrimination does not discriminate. With 7 billion people in the world, you will encounter at least one person who will hate you for what you are or what you cannot change. No amount of brand name clothing, trendy haircuts, or skin treatments could change that. Sometimes the human race is hideous and all you can do is be beautiful in return. Nobody will ever tell you that people are so ugly.

4.) SELF ESTEEM:
You are one person just as capable as any other given person. However, there are things you want to change about yourself. It is so much easier to hate yourself than it is to love yourself, because the world will keep turning regardless of your opinion of yourself. The truth is that in the real world, nobody but yourself will be thinking about your self esteem while making a decision, except for yourself. It's like jumping a fence; you are running through life and encounter fences as you go. You could either choose to slow down and climb the fence, or make a running leap over it. Either way, if you get snagged in the fence you will get caught up. It's a lot harder to untangle yourself from chain link fence than it is to just get over it. Take my word for it. Nobody will ever tell your that loving yourself may occasionally include tough love.





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