You wake up lying in your bed feeling alone and forgotten. You check your phone for messages or maybe a missed call but, like always, you find nothing. Your friends are out at parties or with their boyfriends or girlfriends while you’re stuck at home in your room alone. “Welcome to reality.” You tell yourself, “Welcome to depression.”

Whether you’re a pregnant teenage girl who feels abandoned by the world or a teenage boy who has searched every corner of the world to find his purpose in life, one thing is for certain; Life is full of difficulties and drama that will more than likely leave you full of hatred and spite. Either towards yourself, somebody else or even god himself, you will feel anger towards someone. I know this to be true because I have suffered from both anger issues and depression for almost all of my life! I have cursed god’s name and committed countless atrocities of which can never be forgiven. Yes, I too have hated my existence, wondered why I was alone in the world with only my sorrow and guilt to keep me company. I even contemplated taking my own life on several occasions. You may be asking yourself, “Why should I care what somebody is saying?” “Why should I waste my time reading some piece of inspirational garbage?” Well, because I am a person. In fact, I’m probably the most important person that you will ever have the privilege of meeting. Who am I? I’m that voice in your head that told you that yes; you can accomplish your goals. Yes, you are beautiful and any man on this planet would be honored to have you as his own.

This is not some piece of crap inspirational book full of biblical quotes and finger pointing. (I’ve tried those books and they had no effect on my depression.) No, this is a novel that has one sole purpose, to liberate you, the reader, from any self loathing that you have. You say that you’re ugly? Well I disagree! You are special in your own way. So if you’re tired of being depressed, tired of wishing that you could be happy, than continue reading. After all, what do you have to lose?

CHAPTER ONE: THE KEY TO RELIEF

So you decided to continue reading? Good! You have just done two things of great importance: 1. you have proven that you in fact do care about yourself. If you did not care, than why have you picked up this novel in the first place? The human mind is an interesting thing. Sometimes it takes control of your body and makes you do things that you may not even notice, such as when you woke up this morning saying how much you hated yourself and that you wished you were dead. Without your knowledge, you made the decision to read this book with the hope that you may learn something of value. I cannot make you any promises of you obtaining joy or grace but I can, however, swear to you that I do care about you. Why? Because I was you once. I had no one to aid me except for my conscious and alone, it was barely enough to free me. You may not admit it to yourself but I believe that deep down, you long to be free from depression just as I am.

2. The second thing that you have proven is that you indeed have some self-respect left inside of you. This is proven because you gave yourself the courage to admit that you need some help to conquer your depression. This novel is the help of which you seek. I am not asking you to change your hobbies or your personality. I’m not telling you to go out and make new friends that you don’t want to or to do some “self promoting” things. No, all I ask of you is to take the first step in relieving yourself from your depression. What is step one? That’s simple yet the most difficult of all steps. Tell yourself that you cannot. Yes, you’re reading this correctly. I want for you to make a list of what you cannot do, whether that is asking out that boy or girl that you’ve had your eyes on for awhile now, or achieving that goal that you’ve always dreamed of. “Wait a minute?! What is this guy talking about?!” Trust me, in the state that you’re in, you won’t be able to achieve your goals anyway.

The first stage of ending depression is admitting to what you cannot do. False hope is a poison that will seep into your veins and destroy you from the inside out. As long as you have no confidence in yourself, you can have no confidence in what you plan on doing. You may be in a state of confusion right now but trust me; I know what I’m talking about. You are useless to yourself for as long as you allow yourself to be. Once you make your list, glue it somewhere where you can always see it. This is an important task that will come in handy in the future. As the title of the chapter promises, the key to relief is the cold, hard truth. You know that you will not be able to date that head cheerleader or ask that football player to the dance, so don’t kid yourself into believing that you can. If you try it and fail, then you’re just giving yourself another reason to hate yourself. No matter what happy, preppy, motivational speech that you hear, you can never be anybody until you admit that you are a nobody. You will always be a nobody until you grasp life by the reins and become a somebody. But take heart, with time, you will be able to reach that finish line to happiness but neither god, Satan, your parents or your lover can get you there. Only you possess the willpower to get out of your personal hell.

Going back to a quote from Master Yoda, “Don’t trust your eyes, for they will deceive you. Listen to your ears to find your way.” In case you are confused, the message is to not look at your flaws. Listen to what other people tell you. They will see what you cannot. In a way, other people’s criticism can and will lead to your progress. Listen to what they say. If they call you creepy, weird, or just plan odd, listen to them. Embrace their criticism with open arms. The truth can and will set you free. I had a friend once who told me that I was “too clingy.” She ended up replacing me with a more normal friend and forgot about me. Well, I pondered on a thought. “What if she’s right?” I wondered, “What if I am clingy?” I decided to take action. On that day, I decided to change myself for a day. To my surprise, it worked! I ceased following my friends around and even went as far as excluding myself from the rest of the world. I did this as a sort of test to see just how many true friends that I had. The people that were close to me would grow worried and ask me what the matter was, that’s how I knew who my true companions were. That knowledge gave me a piece of mind that has stayed with me even to this day. The relief you get from knowing that you are not alone in the world can mean the difference between you hating life or appreciating what you have.

Now that you have learned what the key to relief is, it’s time to learn what the three W’s are.

CHAPTER TWO: THE THREE W’S

I am pleased to learn that you have decided to continue reading. Believe it or not but you are a soldier fighting a war. Who is your enemy? Your target is your depression! Failure is not an option in this army. The next step in your road to happiness is the three W’s, what you have, what you want, and what you’ll do to get it. Now, going back to the previous chapter, you were instructed to discard all of your goals in life. Now that you’ve done that, I want you to make a list of what all that you have. Do you have a mother or a father? How about some money or perhaps a roof over your head? Take note of everything that you have, even the most insignificant of items. Why am I asking you to do this? Because everything that you’ve listed is something that someone somewhere doesn’t have. You may not see it but you are a very lucky person. Some kids have a mother to make them dinner or a father to teach them life lessons. Some people are homeless and do not have sufficient funds to keep their families healthy. What little things that you take for granted would be priceless to some other unfortunate soul. So don’t feel as though you have nothing because in reality, you have more than most.

Now, the second W is important yet simple. It’s what you want. List anything and everything that you wish to receive in life, whether it’s a lover, an item or just to be happy, I want for you to list them. Don’t be too afraid to list even the most unusual of things! This is your novel and I’m your friend, feel free to doodle down anything that you desire. Finally, we are at the third and final W, what you’ll do to get it. This is the most difficult part of this step due to the fact that no one likes to do work. If you truly want to be happy, than you will need to take that first step yourself. Stop delaying your future by making excuses for not doing something! You must drop the hammer on your mind and tell it that you are in control! If you want to fall in love and meet the person of your dreams than take that first step! Present yourself to that person. Make them laugh. Become their friend and eventually something will happen! Or you can take a different approach and sign up for an online dating website.

Do you long to be happy? Than stop telling yourself that you’re stupid, fat or ugly. You are your only obstacle to true happiness! If I can stop bringing myself down than I know for a fact that you can too. Yes, there is the possibility that you may fail but failure is always a risk. It is also a golden opportunity to learn a lesson. If you fail at something one way then don’t simply give up, try a different approach. Examine your mistakes and improve yourself upon them. Anything is possible if you truly wish for it to be so. In life, you are given only so many chances. I believe that you should always grasp a hold of these opportunities whenever possible because you never know which one will change your life. I’m not saying that you will wake up and a golden opportunity will be standing at your door but I am saying that you must answer the door bell whenever it rings.

CHAPTER FOUR: CLEAR YOUR MIND

The next step in the course to happiness is to clear your mind of all negativity. If something is bothering you or makes you feel uncomfortable than I want for you to simply forget that it exists. The only thoughts that should be in your head are ones that involve bettering your future. Think about what you could improve upon or maybe consider what career that you would like to pursue. These uplifting thoughts will make you feel good about yourself and will allow for you to see the good in your life. The mind is a wondrous thing. A single thought could be powerful enough to incite violence, reveal emotions of love or even force one to do drastic actions. To control and master your mind is one of the major ways that someone can get themselves out of feeling depressed. In order to do this, you should cease all negative transactions in life. If you smoke, consider quitting. Your body would become healthier and in turn, you would be able to achieve more in life. Are you a drinker? Maybe drinking away your problems is a bad idea. Liquor is just a crutch and will only lead to you losing brain cells and making bad choices. Do you use sex as a way to feel good? Well then you are misguided. Yes, it is true that sex generates pleasure but each time you do it, you lose a piece of yourself. To have sex is something to be performed by two people who are in love, not by two strangers who have just met. Why do you think that it’s called making love?

Your mind is affected by each and every action and decision that you make. If you have negative thoughts all of the time, than perhaps you are doing something that is bothering you deep down. The mind is also affected by your willpower. If you lay down and submit to peer pressure all the time than you will think of yourself as a coward. The next time that you are asked to do something that you don’t want to, say no! No matter how many times that the person asks. Never give in to your peers because if you do, they will walk all over you. You may think of yourself as a worthless nobody but that’s not true! I for one believe in you and see the talent that resides inside of you. So much talent in fact that you have already progressed to the final step in my program. At the end, a surprise awaits.

CHAPTER FIVE: MAKE A FRIEND

I am so very proud of you for making it so far. You have read my book and in turn, told yourself that you will no longer tolerate being alone in the world. That you shall and will be happy in your life, no matter what people say about you. Your final task is the easiest one, you are going to make a new friend. Why is this important? Because it will prove to you that you are indeed a like able person.