I found this place. I drove towards where the sunset should’ve been even though grey clouds meanly hid it. I needed something but I didn’t know what. Something to make me feel better. Something to help me feel not so entirely unsure of everything. Something to save me.
And I was driving, driving, driving, wondering if I should turn around, watching deer cross the road and whistling to sad songs as the wind picked up.
There was supposed to be a park but I knew I had gone too far. I just kept on, because I didn’t want to go back and I didn’t want to stop. After a while the road started to turn up and soon I could see light shining through the trees. At the top of the hill I found the sun, just under the grey sky and over darker clouds that looked just like mountains, broad and seeming to rise up from the horizon.
Hills rolled on with worn down paths, and before them were fields of long grass dotted with oak trees. Dandelions shot up in bunches, some still glowing yellow and some loosing all their seeds. The wind was blowing madly, so the grass and trees and flowers all twisted in the same direction - away. Sunset light lit everything up in the way that hurts because you can’t take it with you even though that’s all you want to do.
Opposite the hills was a small cemetery, the headstones all basking in the blaze. I pulled over on across the road from it, on the right. A picnic table sat alone in between more oak trees, but still open to the view. I got out even though it scared me. It shouldn’t have, I don’t know why it did. Sometimes I just get scared.
I sat at the table for a moment, but soon a car was coming so I hid behind the trunk of one of the big trees. After it passed I went up past a large, stone cross that matched the cemetery. There was the corner of where a fence used to be, taken over by the swaying dandelions. It was under the edge of all the oaks, and I sat down. It was so beautiful - everything illuminated in the golden glow.
The wind never died down. I stared at the sun until even when I looked away I still saw the burning outline. I begged her to stay, but she didn’t. She and the remaining light disappeared behind the cloud peaks together. The grey returned, but it didn’t seem as unkind. I got back in my car and drove toward home.
In town the sky had opened a bit, and though it wasn’t sunny it was lighter. I went slowly down Main Street, studying the houses on either side. They weren’t so bad. All the lawns were green from spring and most had flowers. They brightened up the aged houses. Everything was alive again, and breathing. I had a funny thought, that maybe I was too.