Feeling Alone is My Specialty

March 25, 2012
By jennarosep SILVER, Washington Township, New Jersey
jennarosep SILVER, Washington Township, New Jersey
6 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Yes, I could use some support right now, thank you. Stop laughing at me. This isn’t funny. It’s like I need tragedy to strike for anyone to be here, and then they’re only around for the camera flashes, they don’t realize pain doesn’t fade with a day. Tomorrow doesn’t forget yesterday. I’m sorry you can’t understand but this is killing me. And it’s so funny because everyone thinks they can understand. They see cancer and it’s a link, it’s a story, it’s a connection but read the small print please. Please see that cradled in the C is the words, “hatred or love?” and resting in the crook of the A is “depression and anxiety” and hiding under the N’s strong legs are “adulthood came too soon” and the other C holds the question “will it ever end?”, tucked in the E is “i’ve never felt so alone” and standing on the edge of R, ready to jump is “how much longer can I survive like this?”. Still, you think you understand, but if you understood wouldn’t you realize that this is a battle fought everyday? And excuse me if i’m a little irrational, a little overemotional and a little sensitive but I think I deserve to be. I’m fighting this battle on my own and I’ve been keeping it together for a year now. I don’t think I can hold on much longer.

The author's comments:
My father's cancer battle lasted through my freshman and sophomore years of high school. My father and I's relationship was not good, he just didn't know it. But even for an irrational teenager, it's hard to hate someone who's suffering, even if they hurt you.

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