Breathe...

March 16, 2012
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My breath came out uneven as I tried to breathe for our sake. I pressed my hands against my forehead, soothing my temples and darting my eyes around and around looking for what to say next before it was too late.

He stood there with his gaze far away into another world. A world where I didn’t exist anymore and I knew this because he had told me…he had told me. I crossed my arms and bounced on both of my legs, tears streaming down my face as I tried to catch my breath.

“Stop crying. You’re still gonna have me but just not now.” He said without looking at me just once. I shook my head and felt my nails dig into my skin so deep. I could feel the creases in my forehead as I shut my eyes closed, wishing to be sucked into another place where I wasn’t going through this pain. I shifted my weight back and forth until I finally stopped and looked up at him.

“Im so so sorry for everything. Ugh! I wish I could be perfect so I don’t have to put you through any of this. Please forgive me! Im so freaking stupid, babe. Im sorry Im messing up. Please.” I begged but got nothing in response. To see him shed a tear but unmoving, made me cry out in pain of knowing there was nothing else I could do.

“I’ll see you…” He trailed off as he saw me fall to my knees crying. I grabbed my head and pressed my lips together, rocking back and forth as I cried out.
My hands shook as I tried to hold myself together but it was hard. Blurrily, I saw his arms reach for me, bringing me into his chest.
“I’m not going anywhere…I love you.” He whispered in my ear before he kissed my tears away.





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