When people look at me they think I had the perfect childhood, noting went wrong. But they don't know that my dad chose doing drugs over being my father. People don't understand that it ruined me, it made me put a wall around my self so I don't let people in. My dad would leave for months at a time, even a year once, he didn't care that he had two children that needed him in their life's. I would sometimes go over to his house and he would go in the back with his friends and get high. I knew what drugs smelled like and looked like before I even got into junior high. He says that he loves me but it's just one more thing that he does to hurt me, because if he really loved me he wouldn't have chosen drugs over being a father. I've recently noticed that I don't let people in because if I do I get hurt. So I choose not to get hurt.