Joey playing guitar in the background is the only thing keeping me sane right now. My mom is snoring so loudly I’m sure the whole first floor can hear it. I just put in my other ear bud but I can still hear her. There…. I turned up the volume, now there’s nothing but Joey playing. He’s a magician when it comes to playing his guitar. He’s so confident. I envy his abilities, the way he knows he can play so well and then pushes himself to become better. We are a lot alike. I’ve been pushing myself lately as hard as I really can to improve myself. The results are exciting when I realize how quickly I’m moving up and how far I’m able to stretch. Noah and Joey are the two guys in my life. Noah is my official boyfriend and Joey is my stalker. He doesn’t really stalk me other than the deep twisting corridors of my mind. He’s always there, hiding around a corner ready to pop out like we’re starring in some cheesy horror film. But he doesn’t scare me, not the way Noah does. Noah doesn’t scare me either though, I scare me. The way I feel, the things I do, the way I see what’s going on. It scares me that I can’t sit down and think about anything but one of them. Mostly it’s Noah, but then I have these moments where Joey’s peace engulfs me, where I turn to him and just listen. I wouldn’t have made it through this far without him. He’s my saving grace while Noah sleeps and prepares for a Christmas trip. Joey is grounded from his phone because he thought it would be cool to ditch school, well guess again my dears. This is why I don’t ditch! With my luck I would fall and end up in the hospital so everyone would know what I was doing and then my life would be over. Grounded for more than a day, more than a week, longer than a month, a year might suffice. Total lockdown is what I’m talking about. There is no room for error in my life. I will be caught, punished, and I will learn my lesson. Might as well just play it safe, coast through high school and life and just figure everything out in the end. Nah, I’m just kidding, I would never actually get into too much trouble considering the stories I’ve heard of my mother’s teen years. Sounds like she was quite the rebel and will never have any room to talk when wanting to punish me for something she did as well when she was a child. I think it’s funny, however, that she thinks she’s so sly. I know all her tricks as she claims to know all mine. I’m not being cocky about it, I’m just saying she uses it as a fear tactic, tries to scare me out of doing things by claiming to pretty much be God. All knowing and all that jazz. Well, I have a few tricks up my sleeve. Yeah, okay, so maybe I don’t, but hey, maybe I do… Maybe I’m just not the kind of kid that enjoys going behind my parents’ backs because I think it’s my duty as a teen to annoy them death and make them feel like complete and total failures. I don’t drink because it’s nasty. I would never come close to a cigarette or drug; my face, body, and life are all just way too important to me for that. I’m not as big of an idiot as all the adults seem to think I am. Through their eyes I’m just a teenage girl begging to get her v-card stamped on the earliest train out of town. They think I’m weak enough to fall into the clever, deadly traps of peer pressure. They believe I’m dumb enough to ruin everything on a bag of Meth. They don’t realize that I’ve dedicated my life to protect and save and help. They just don’t get me, how cliché. I want to be in the Military. Preferably a navy SEAL. I’m stuck between the Army and they Navy. It’s a really tough decision for me, it gets complicated on whether or not you want mostly education or if you want mostly physical training. Lately, all I want is Physical Training, I can’t get enough of it!
Life Life Life
December 26, 2011