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A War With Words

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My face was stricken with the look of shock, there were screams stuck in my throat unable to escape and there was a feeling of paralysis, gradually beginning to overcome my body after my mind finally processed what was just texted to me. Had she really just said that? Had those incredibly cruel, malicious, and stomach-turning-eye-tearing-fist-clenching words just manifest upon my screen?

“Did you not understand me?” My phone vibrated again just as I was slowly looking down to reread the previous message. “NO ONE LIKES YOU. If it hadn’t been for me you would have been crawling back to that delinquent public school where you came from because nobody here likes you! I do everything for you! Yet, you don’t appreciate anything! Congratulations by the way, you just managed to lose your last and only friend. Nice job...”

The echoes of the words I had just read pounded in my head. I tried to contain myself, but in this situation I could not gather up enough strength. Tears poured down my face as hard as the rain in the 2010 floods. My father walked in my room on that warm summer day to inspect the disturbance in the usually happy atmosphere.

“What happened now?” He had known me and my closest friend had been fighting but I had not yet introduced him to the broken down person I truly was inside.

I held up the phone and let him read the message. We are extremely close so sharing this deeply paining message wasn’t a problem.
“Call her. Call her and talk to her. You teenagers these days don’t know how to communicate anymore.”

Those were those last words he had to on the topic and left it to me to be the bigger person in the situation. I know that my friend had not meant what she said. But, when we’re mad we tend to say things we don’t mean and they can be blown completely out of proportion. So, deciding to try to patch things up between us, I dialed her number and was then sent straight to voice mail. From that point on the fight continued and so did the endless tears.

Although my friend and I are now back to where we were before the fight, we lost the whole summer to hangout and have an amazing time because of some stupid things we said. Words are one of the most dangerous things in our society. They have the ability to create peace and start a war at the same time. They are stronger then actions in a sense too since one can recover from a physical altercation but the effects of hurtful words linger on. The remnants of cruel vocabulary stick in someone’s head like the latest song or the grade they just got on a test.

Throughout my fourteen years of life there have been countless times when someone’s words have deeply hurt me. The some of the worst have come from my own family. Unfortunately, when someone’s own family makes remarks that can be taken as offensive or rude, it sinks in and we remember it forever. One of the most upsetting times for me was when my cousin told me I wasn’t an actual part of the family. This stung me deeply since I was one of the youngest members of the family at the time and being told I wasn’t a true part was hard for me to hear. Sadly, since I was so young I took what she said to heart and didn’t see her or any of my other cousins for another few months, because I felt like I didn’t fit in. The reason she said this to me was because my last name was different then most of my other cousins. Their dad’s were all brothers and my mom was their sister therefore my mom changed her name after she got married. So, I was the odd one out.

Over time though, we grow and try to ignore the things people have said to us in the past. Many of us have the ability to over look things said to us as time passes. Unfortunately, a small (but growing) percentage of the population can’t take the hurtful words any longer so sadly they take their own lives trying to escape the pain. It’s very sad seeing this happen to kids our own age since you think to yourself, “What if I was in his”or, “her place?” It’s hard for us to comprehend why people do this but it all comes down to us understanding that the effects of hurtful words on people can be more painful then a broken bone. No one learns that if we say something to someone one day, the consequences can be heartbreaking the next.

We all know we’ve said something to someone we wish we could take back. But, that’s the thing. You can’t take words back. Once their said, the damage has been done. So, the next time you’re in a fight with a friend or family member picture what the world would be with out them then think about what you’re going to say next.





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