Pains deeper then I’ve ever known comes to surface on this horrid day. A day I’ve been dreading for awhile now. I don’t know what to think I’m not sure what I’m supposed to be feeling. But as I look at the date reality sets in. This could have been such a special day; it could have been a mark of strength. Unfortunately for me you’re spending it with someone new. A terrible fate this has brought us, oddly enough, it’s. all. my. fault. So I try hard as I can to put a smile on for the rest of the world. There’s nothing here to see, don’t bother asking me because I won’t tell. But still as everybody notices they ask. I can do nothing but shake my head and cry. Nobody knows the truth and if they did they wouldn’t understand. Even I don’t understand. There is still not a day that goes by where I don’t regret my goodbye. Everything I do I get memories of me and you. My chest aches, my eyes swell and tears begin to fall. There’s nothing I can do to stop them, they just come. I can’t turn back the hands of time, if I could id go back. Back to when you were mine. I never would have walked away. Id still be by your side today. I can’t begin to put in words the feelings I have for you and even if I tried I could never forget me and you. The way your lips so soft and smooth caressed mine, your every move. The way you were, the way I felt. You made me so happy and still I left. I can apologize all I want but I can not hide the pain inside me from you, the way I miss us and what used to be. I may never find another who could make me feel so free and I may never find another who loved me the way you did. You were the love of my life even if we started so young. You’re still the love of my life two years later. Im not willing to change ive always stayed the same but I need you in my life. Please forget that someone new and lets be just us two. I can’t live without you and your touch. I can not breathe in a sweet melody. Instead I stumble in my head. I trip on the dead inside me, I fall into a place of no return deeper and deeper until one day ill be gone. My head and heart don’t seem to want to part from you. So I relive each day as if I were to stay. Memories I wish I could have back, I relive the moments but never our last, im so sorry I left. Could you forgive me and give me the chance I deserve? Please forget your other her. Im not ready to be your history, for the sake of my sanity please give us one last shot. Im dying inside everyday, im lying to everyone’s face. Im watching in horror as you progress towards happiness with her. I can feel it now you think you love her like you loved me. But theres no way youre even close to what we had. They say if you love something set it free if it comes back it was always yours, if it doesn’t then it was never yours to begin with. So if that’s the case and you aren’t coming back well then I hope that someday I can look at you and say, you are my yesterday and now im stronger and my tears always fade.
Tears Always Fade
March 30, 2011