I can remember the countless times i locked myself in the car. I can remember the times I'd blast music for hours. I remember the times that I would pray to god for days hoping things would get better. I can remember never crying. I was little but i was forced to be independent. I bottled everything up inside. I told myself soon i would leave. I would get away from everything. I would leave this world. No one would notice, or at least that's how i felt. I would hear the screams from across the yard. I would hear the threats to call the cops. I loved them both but there was nothing i could do. I would sleep outside for days at a time. They didn't even know. Why me? Did they think i could handle it? I was just a kid. I didn't deserve this. They were wrong and they didn't even know it.
killing me inside
March 13, 2011