I was thirteen when he left.


Thirteen years of laughs,


Thirteen years of tears,


Thirteen years of memories,


Gone.


In three easy words,


“I’m moving out.”




I screamed. I cried.


I begged. I yelled.



“Why Daddy, why?”


He didn’t answer me.


“Why Daddy, why?”


He picked up his suitcase.


“Why Daddy, why?”


He walked out the door.


“Why Daddy, why?”


He didn’t look back.



But I did.




I flashed back to the days when we were a family.



The vacations we took, the games we played, the house we shared.


I flashed back to the days when my parents were one.


The gifts they exchanged, the love they showed, the room they shared.



I flashed back to the days when we were happy.


The traditions we held, the achievements we cherished, the smiles we shared.



But then, reality hit the “live” button and brought me back.


I watched his car, as it ran away from a place it no longer belonged.


Where he no longer belonged.



Where he no longer wanted to be.




“Why Daddy, why?”



I blamed myself.


I didn’t know much about love, but I knew enough to know married people loved.


Mommy and Daddy were married, so they loved each other.



And people who love each other, didn’t want to leave each other.


So it couldn’t have been her fault, and it couldn’t have been his fault...


It was my fault.


There was no one left to blame.




“I’m sorry Daddy, I’m so sorry.”




I punished myself.


I barely ate, I barely slept.


All I did was think.


Think about how it was all my fault,


And think about how I destroyed our family.



“I’m sorry Mommy, I’m so sorry.”




I crawled into her half-empty bed.


I sobbed in her arms and apologized again and again.


“What are you sorry for? It’s not your fault.”




I looked at her, confused.




“It’s no one’s fault.”



“Then why’d he leave?” I wiped my tears.




“He didn’t love me anymore, and I didn’t love him.”



“But you’re married, and married people love each other!”




I tried to convince her, but it didn’t work.



“Nothing lasts forever, baby girl.”