Dear Uncle Miguel,

I remember when I first heard about you...I got in shock because they usually never mentioned you. I will only hear Miguel this and Miguel that. They say you were 16 years old when it all started. You were still young. You looked all banged out, light brown, short hair cut, always dressing nice with clean clothes whenever you went out. I remember they brought you up. They told me you did drugs and were involved in a lot of problems and in gangs.

However, you were the uncle I didn't know but when I heard your story I felt like you where always by my side and as i’m living your life with you. You would go out with a nice shirt and pants and you would come back with your clothes all dirty and ripped from the bottom. I asked myself “Damn, doesn't my uncle know what he got in to.” I didn't say nothing I got to thinking a lot in my head. Then they told me that you got with some lady called Myra.

I don't know who she was but, I did feel that she was a bad influence for you. Many times you have been to jail but you still didn't learn your lesson. My mom and grandma tried helping you but you just didn't listen to them. They would do the impossible to help you, but you decided not to listen. It looked like you didn’t care about anything.

Did you ever think Uncle? My mom would bail you out all those 7 times because of my grandma Susana. My mom said that my grandma would be crying badly because you always ended up in jail. But while you were living your life you made my grandma suffer a lot. They said you had two kids with Myra one was named Johnathan and the other one Miguel just like you.


They were two innocent boys, who didn't know anything. They sometimes wouldn’t eat because Myra. She will only care about herself. She would leave her kids to go with her home-girls. She was always on drugs and very outgoing. I think she even got addicted to them. Your own baby’s momma gave weed to your own kids. She would boil the weed in some pot and make it like tea and but it in your own kids bottle. But where were you? You finally decided to come to L.A. You left your kids with that lady. You just came here to get worse and worse.

When suddenly, you where fine for the first months you were okay but you got into doing a lot of things. I thought you were calmly.Another, day me and my mom were sitting down in this black hard sofa in the living room. I kept asking her about you. My mom told me you were involved in one gang and one mafia. I asked my mom, “Ma mi abuelita sabea que mi tio esta enrolado en pandiallas?”(Mom did my grandma know that my uncle was a gangbanger?) My mom replied “Si sabea pero no quiere aser nada para ayudarlo”(Yea she did know but she didn’t want to do nothing about it).

It’s like life is a beach and your just playing in the sand because you just did whatever you wanted and just lived your life. My mom told me that you were in MS gang. They called you Silent because you were always quiet when you did stuff, you wouldn’t tell no one what you did. You always keep it to yourself. You were the quietest from the crowd. In my head, I felt super mad because, why did you even get in there in the first place. Then my mom keep telling me more about you. She told me that you were nice in the inside.

Also, that you didn't know nothing about your two kids. Until one day my grandma did because she got one only because Myra didn't want them. Therefor, my grandma stayed with Johnathan. She didn’t hear about Miguel for a while. A few weeks later you did,only because Myra had gave away one of your sons to her friend. What your friend did was gave it to my grandma because she had enough kids her own. Myra tried to get them back but my grandma wouldn’t let them. You were not even aware of this.

Yet, you were over here in L.A having the time of your life in gangs and drugs. I really think it’s wrong because instead of doing that you could have been taking care of your kids. It seemed like you were ungrateful. I hope those 12 years locked up did make you change. You told me that when you’re out your going to change well I do wanna see you change. I really wanna see you. I miss you like a child misses their blanket.

But dam every time me and my mom bring you up my dad has to butt in and tell me that I’m going end up like you or my cousins. I act like that and sometimes I dress like that, but they push me to it. I do it because that's the only way I could shut them up. I ask my self don’t they get tired of repeating it over and over. Yeah, my mom talks to me and stuff but I get tired of it and I just behave like one and act how you did.

After all, yeah I admit I do stuff but don’t mean I can’t change I don’t like my ways but they just put me to it. I really hate when my dad says that I’m going to end up locked up or pregnant.Yet I don’t tell him how I feel I stay quiet. We fight on the daily bases. I was like damn, are they ever gonna shut up? I get mad and just go to my room. But what Im trying to tell you that to not end up in drugs or gang banging.

The life of a gang banger ain’t as great as you think. They also have there hard times. But the bad part is that they have to be hiding from their enemigas. Like almost everyday you have to be cautiously hiding. Honestly it ain't cool at all. Yeah you try to act tuff but really you ain’t no one is that strong. So, stop messing around and straighten up!