Haunting Promise

February 21, 2011
It sits on my windowsill. It gives me confidence, pride, assurance; but it also haunts me. It reminds me of my successes while slapping me in the face as a reminder that it's over. It signifies glory and fame. And it makes me cry if I look at it for too long. I realize that people change, that nothing is permanent or secure. But I was always oblivious to the idea that even your defining feature can be stripped from you. It was my life; I loved it because I was the best and was rewarded by things and by people. They knew my name. But that was then. It sits on my windowsill echoing my promise, representing my achievement.
I sit with the parents, on the other side of the excitement. I watch the champions, the stress, the pride, and the achievement. I feel envy and anger; I could have been there, been on top, proven myself. But instead I sit and watch.

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