"You won't die of a broken heart"

December 18, 2010
You wont die of a broken heart, you’ll only wish you would. Some heart aches are quick and we are able to move on to find new love. But some only get worse with time. You can be going on with your life thinking that you’re fine, and then the pain sneaks back up on you, tears swell your eyes and you can’t catch your breath. Sometimes it is the good memories that hurt the most. Its the thoughts of when you were happy that are the most haunting. It is incredible how you can share your world with another person, share every moment, every dream and thoughts of a future, and suddenly you are miles apart just trying to forget they ever existed.


Life has her own plan, whether you are going along with it or not. Sometimes a love feels so right, so perfect, so meant to be; but if life has a different plan for you, she will rip your feet right from the dirt and plop you down again. Even if you carve your initials with a heart in a tree, it doesn’t mean that person wont ever hurt you, wont ever look you in the eyes as they stab you in the heart.

Leaving the person you love is one of the hardest things a human soul has to deal with. Others will try to console you and comfort you, but deep down even they know that no words can heal a damaged heart. The truth is, it is not just the heart that is damaged, but the happiness and future that you thought you had. Most break ups end in harsh and bitter words. The last memories we have are of tears and words of hate that leave us numb. That is what makes it so hard. Do we hate that person for what they have said? Do we try to forgive them by thinking that those evil words were said just because they are hurting just as bad inside? How do we forget the love and experiences that we shared for so long, that all came crashing down in seconds? Do people say things they don’t mean when they are angry, or is that when the truth comes out? Perhaps we will never know.

Even after months apart, there are days when you just want to pick up a pen and confess your love to that person. You want to tell them how lost you are, how much you need them and have never stopped thinking about them. But then you remember how bad they hurt you and you remember that they don’t deserve to hear those satisfying words.

Maybe love exists as it does in a story book, but maybe love is a temporary thing. Maybe we are meant to have many lovers, many experiences through life. Each different hand that we hold is strong enough to get us through a certain time in our life. Maybe. But if that is so, why is it so hard to love another? How can a heart cling so desperately to one, when there are a billion other hearts in the world? Does that mean that a one-true-love does exists, but you just lost your chance?

Someone once said that the best way to heal a broken heart, is to fall in love again. How does one fall in love with someone new, when their heart still belongs to someone miles and miles away? Perhaps the person that we need to fall back in love with, is ourselves. When another person breaks our hearts, we feel that we have lost not only a lover, but our happiness, our passions, and the picture of our future. But the truth is, those things should not be in the hands of another person. Our future is only in the hands of ourselves. One should have their own dreams and fulfill them whether someone else wants to come along or not.

There is no doubt that when a lover leaves, they take a part of you with them, and they leave a hole that echos and aches. Our job then is to not let that hole fill with scare tissue, but to fill with new experiences, knowledge and perhaps one day love.

No matter where you are, or who you are with, you always have yourself. Even when a lover leaves, we can still continue to do the things we love to do, even if we have to do it alone for a while. We must continue to go where we want to go, see what we want to see, and learn what we need to learn, and maybe, just maybe somebody new will come along that wants to join us for the ride.





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