My search to find true love | Teen Ink

My search to find true love

December 11, 2010
By AunnaJ23 GOLD, Xenia, Ohio
AunnaJ23 GOLD, Xenia, Ohio
10 articles 4 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Kiss me in the rain and hold me till it stops. And I pray to God that it won't.

My name is Arianna. I’m a light-skinned, average height, average weight, blonde hair and blue-eyed girl. This is not your average, every day love story. Well, I’d hope not.

It was the beginning of the 6th grade year and my life started to come into place where I knew exactly what I was going to do, the friends I was going to hang out with, the good or bad level I was going to be. The only thing I didn’t know, was what guy that I was going to be with.

That year, I went out with three different guys but fell in love with two. Zach was my first. He was in 8th grade. I had never went out with him but fell so deeply in love. Every girl liked him. He was mostly known to be a man w****. I don’t think I thought of that. Zach hugged me every morning and afternoon. We talked on the phone yet never went out. I remember a conversation we had on the phone once. He answered,


“Hey,” I said, smiling to myself.

“Hey. What’s up?”

“Nothing, just talking to you.”

“I have something to tell you but I don’t think I should,” Zach liked doing that to me a lot. He sighed, trying to sound convincing.

“Well, tell me. Please.”

“No, I don’t think I will.”

“Please, Zach. Please. I love you.” I begged.

He chuckled. “You’re so dense.”

I just smiled. “Tell me,”

He gave in, sighed, and said, “This morning when we were hugging, I was going to,” He paused as I continued to listen in. “I was going to try and kiss you.”

I stuttered, “You what?”

“You heard me.” I could just feel his warm smile through the phone.

“Well, why didn’t you?” That was a stupid question. He had a girlfriend, which was one of my best friends.

“Because if I did, Kailee would know.”

“I wouldn’t tell her,” I smirked.

“So, are you saying you wanted me to?”

“I don’t know.” I did know, but now I’m thankful for not telling him.

At this point in my life, I now know that Zach was just trying to lead me on. That’s what I think. Or it’s that he didn’t want to hurt me because I was such a good friend. Pretty soon, I gave up and moved on because I knew a chance would never come along. Well, next it was Spencer.

He was in 5th grade. I didn’t know him but he saw that I was single and looking on my Myspace account. He asked my best friend, Madison, about me and we began texting each other. Believe me, every girl thinks she loves a guy a few weeks after being together. Or maybe even a few days. I thought I was in true love with him but now know, I wasn‘t. We always fought in our texts. I told him about Zach and Spencer didn’t believe that I was over him.

I remember the first kiss that Spencer and I shared. It was amazing. Madison took a picture of it. The season was winter and it was freezing my toes off. Him and I were on and off about three times. Literally. It wasn’t true love. Just a phase I guess.

Later that 6th grade year, I felt lonesome and started to show my feelings for a guy I’ve known for awhile now. His name was Dylan.

He was something.

I had told my friends that I liked him and they asked him out for me.

Laura and Kailee asked him and he said, “No.”

Then Sadie asked him and he said, “No, I don’t want a girlfriend.”

Then Shelby asked him and he said, “I swear if someone asks me again… No!”

Wow, it bruised my heart. But, quickly they faded. March 12, 2010 was the night I went over to Madison’s house. Dylan was her ex boyfriend but she didn’t mind me having some feelings for him now. It was a year ago, she was over it. Anyways, it was twelve-thirty, the 12th day just beginning. We called him and he answered.

Madison asked, “Why do you keep saying no when people ask you out for Arianna?”

“I just don’t want a girlfriend.”

Madison tried to convince him for most of the time then he demanded, “Let me talk to Arianna,” so she handed the phone over.

“Hello,” I say, shyly.

“Hello, hi.”

I said nothing but he said, “Arianna,”


“Will you go out with me?”

The look on my face was thrilled. I was so excited. I said, “Yes.”


The next day, him and Madison came over. That’s when we shared our first kiss. After we did so, he said, “Wow,” then after we did it again he said, “I love you.” Madison and I had our eyes wide and glanced at him. “Did I really just say that?” Dylan asked, feeling weird.

“Yes.” I say.

“I love you.” He said again.

“I love you too.” I said back, this time… I meant it.

Dylan and I were together for two weeks… Then he broke up with me. He was just going through a phase is all. I remember the words and the first time my heart was completely shattered.

“It’s over.” And he hung up.

I thought I wouldn’t care, but as soon as he hung up, I cried. My lungs couldn’t handle it and I could hardly breathe. My eyes drenched with tears that later meant something.

Dylan and I were ALSO on and off. About four times I think.

Then, I broke up with him. In the school gym. His tears were just as bad as mine had been. And I had no real reason to break up with him.
He sat in the corner of the boys bathroom, hid his face in his books, and cried. Dylan refused to go into class.

Then, later, we went back out. Again, we basically broke up at the same time. He acted as if he didn’t care but I did.

We started again and he came over along with Madison. I don’t know why, but wanted to break up with him. Madison did for me and Dylan did something that we’ll all never forget. He tried to hurt himself. He stabbed his arm with a tack then tried to jump off of my roof. When I saw him on the edge of my roof, I jumped out and wrapped my arms around him with full force. I couldn’t let him get hurt. Especially since my house was two-story.

Then we moved on for awhile. The whole summer break in fact.

After him, was Micah.

Micah was like Zach, but worse. He was a complete and utter man w****. Did I realize? No. But, Micah seemed like my dream guy. I prayed and prayed to keep him every night. Never understood that he wasn’t the one for me… Or for anyone in that matter. Yet, when he hugged me, I felt safe and warm. When we first kissed, it was also amazing. We were also on and off, about five times. Maybe even six.

Micah would always say on the phone, “It’s over,” then there’d be a silence and he’d say, “Just kidding.” I still didn’t get the picture that he wasn’t for me. I thought that I loved him and that he loved me. Wrong.

I finally broke up with him and moved on.

I guess going out with Micah helped me get over Dylan. But, like I said in the beginning. I had two loves. Zach, but he wasn’t the one for me and Dylan.

The beginning of 7th grade came along. I walked passed Dylan while going to pick up my sister. Suddenly, my feelings for him burst out of my heart like I couldn’t hold them in any longer. I was in love.

Soon, we started to go back out. About a week only, then I broke up with him for a guy I almost went out with. That was Jonathan. But Dylan and I went back out about three days later.

Madison told him that I liked Jonathan still and Dylan broke up with me… And went out with my other best friend, Shelby!

I was furious at Shelby and wanted her to be dead. But, it’s funny because on the 26th of October, Dylan came over so we could hang out as friends. It was Tuesday I believe. He was with Shelby and as we sat together, I took him by the head to whisper something that was funny into his ear.

He changed that into the most passionate and deepest kiss we’ve ever shared. After we did so, he said, “Oh no,” because he had forgotten all about Shelby. The next day, the 27th, he broke up with her. We talked on the phone and I asked playfully, “Who are you going out with?” And he said, “A girl named Arianna. She’s so beautiful.”

“But you haven’t asked me.”

“Do I really have to?”

I giggled. “No.”

We still stand strong today.

The author's comments:
I just decided to tell about my 6th through 7th grade love experience. Enjoy.

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This article has 3 comments.

on Feb. 23 2013 at 1:09 am
TheAsianHeather SILVER, Wuhan, Other
6 articles 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
It is no longer I that live,but Christ living in me.-The Apostle Paul

I first read this two years ago and had completely forgotten about it.Now when I read it again,I'm still amazed.Also,I had a new understanding to it.I hope you two can be together,forever and always.Thank you,Arianna,for your wonderful tale.

AunnaJ23 GOLD said...
on Dec. 24 2010 at 1:45 pm
AunnaJ23 GOLD, Xenia, Ohio
10 articles 4 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
Kiss me in the rain and hold me till it stops. And I pray to God that it won't.

Thank you!(: This is my real life story to be honest.

on Dec. 15 2010 at 11:34 am
TheAsianHeather SILVER, Wuhan, Other
6 articles 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
It is no longer I that live,but Christ living in me.-The Apostle Paul

This is like,amazing.