I Can't Promise a Fairytale

August 21, 2010
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Switchfoot says, “Hold fast to the break of daylight, the shadow proves the sunshine.”
The only problem is, I still have to deal with the shadows.
The only problem is, this isn’t a fairytale and I’m not insured a happy ending.

If this were a fairytale, I’d still have my beast, the girl that may as well be Beauty. I’d still have my best gal, someone to talk to any time of the day. I’d still have that strength, honesty and purity. I’d still have the artistic girl that rose her arms to the sky in a bright kitchen at 3:14 AM on that day in late May, quoting He whom she believes in.
“Let there be light!”
And let it bring the shadows and a single haunting question.
What happened?

It’s a question I ask myself often wishing I had the answer, wishing it were a multiple-choice question. I even ask around my mental database, my imaginary friend Alexa, the superheroes Momo and Appa, their archenemies Omega One, Omega Two, Omega Three, and the four daughter of Omega Two, known as the Omega Fours. None of them have the answers, either. They just echo my question.
What happened?

I believe I sound crazy, absolutely insane. I’m okay with being crazy alone, but it’s better in groups.
I miss the days we were crazy together, sometimes just us and sometimes with others, other friends or Brother Beast or Mama Beast.

Dancing at Skateaway. Rocking out in general. Thriller. Coming up with elaborate, evil plans that would never work. Ice cream. The mall. Modeling clothes we would never wear. Staying up all night, even when I had to get my butt to karate early the next morning.

I choose you, Pikachu.

Getting married illegally through a Pokéball and a Ring Pop, no papers to sign, no minister, no reception, no dress, no guests, all fake and quick before school one day, a day we never remember. Our anniversary was to be Halloween, since the real date slipped our minds. It’s not real but it’s Facebook official.
At least, it was.

Momo and Appa wield their weapons, the Ipod and the baseball bat, demanding answers.
What happened?

I guess it’s because I went away. Nine days and suddenly the distance was greater than the distance I traveled, that 3500 or so miles.
Months later and in that time conversation was so hard, difficult, forced. Face to face was awkward. I wish everything could be back to how it was before I got on that plane. I wish seeing each other would have sparked this idle friendship, but instead it saddened me.
I hate it.
What happened?

What’s the difference, anyway? You’ll be leaving in a few days, off to your new life, to the years you’ll never forget.

The difference is that I miss you, everything and anything. I still have those colored pictures of us, the interchangeable Beauty and Beast, hanging on my wall, along with Salvador Peter the Third. I’ve taken great care of that unicorn. He misses you.

I miss our promise, the one that I know will be broken, that we’ll stay in touch and stay the same, as always, just as close, distance doesn’t matter.

Even in my wildest dreams, I do not see us fulfilling that promise.

And you may think I’m crazy or overly lonely or any number of other adjectives that may or may not be good.

But my Beast containing a Beauty, I make this new promise, one I won’t break. I won’t forget you, though we may not stay in touch, and I’ll always take care of Salvador Peter the Third, thought he’ll continue to miss you terribly. You are his father-mother, after all.

I promise the shadows will be the fading of our bond and the goodbye. I promise the sunshine will be the memories of our long-lost friendship, the one that will always have a place in my heart.

I pinky promise.

Until the last petal falls.

Join the Discussion

This article has 23 comments. Post your own now!

KellyEmilie said...
May 24, 2011 at 11:51 am

Until the last pedal falls

AMAZING! I love this article, It really shows how things change over time. Keep writing!

KellyEmilie replied...
May 24, 2011 at 11:52 am


whoops. (:

hold.me.still..899 said...
Oct. 9, 2010 at 8:21 am
aww, this article was reallyy good: there was deep emotion nd it had great voice.. i also loved how u ended it
CallMeFelix replied...
Oct. 9, 2010 at 8:27 am
Thanks xD I'm glad you liked it
AsIAm This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Sept. 21, 2010 at 9:36 pm

The good: This made my head go twisty-turny and brought back a rush of hysterical best-friend memories.  BTW, I'm sorry for my weirdness, I'm goofy when I'm tired. :) Anyway, though, this was really good, and I loved the emotion!

The Bad: Slightly confusing, but not in a bad way too often.  Most of the time it was in a "haha sorry this is an inside joke you aren't allowed to get" way.  Kinda sweet, really.

The Random:  This brings back so many memories!  ... (more »)

CallMeFelix replied...
Sept. 22, 2010 at 6:11 am

The Good: No worries about the weirdness.

The Bad: Yeah, I've been getting that "I don't understand what this is" thing a lot...and yup, inside jokes of course xP

The Random: Isn't it good that you have memories that'll make you laugh so long?


In_Love_Loved said...
Sept. 19, 2010 at 5:04 pm
Hi! Thank you for your nice feedback on my article. I appreciate it. I really liked this article a lot. It's good emotion and description.
CallMeFelix replied...
Sept. 19, 2010 at 8:22 pm
Thanks =) and no problem
A.Dreamer said...
Sept. 18, 2010 at 8:32 pm

I love the beauty and the beast references! It made the characters seem so real in a fantasy way! Some of it doesn't make sense to me, because I don't know the characters though. The last sentence is so memorable though.

Until the last petal falls.

So touching!

CallMeFelix replied...
Sept. 18, 2010 at 9:05 pm

Thanks =) I kinda knew it wouldn't make sense to basically...well...everyone, but I had to leave it how I wrote it or else it wouldn't have had the same meaning =)


By the way, I'm just going to give you a huge THANK YOU for all your previous and future comments xD

A.Dreamer replied...
Sept. 18, 2010 at 9:57 pm
Ahh, okay. :) And it's no problem, I enjoy reading your work! I haven't been in the writing forums that much lately, but anytime you get more work up, just comment, and I'll look!
Whylime said...
Sept. 3, 2010 at 6:55 pm
this is true right? well any hoozle its good but a bit strange.... anime references mostly but that was somehow wierdly good because it gave the characters more depth and made them more unique.
CallMeFelix replied...
Sept. 4, 2010 at 1:54 pm

I made anime references? Really? I know I made references to Beauty and the Beast...but most of the other stuff is inside jokes or whatever between me and my "Beast" (like Momo, Appa, and the Omegas).

Yeah, it's true =) Thanks for the feedback!

CallMeFelix replied...
Sept. 4, 2010 at 1:55 pm
Oh, and Pokemon. I forgot that one xD
ItWasAMurderButNotACrime This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Aug. 31, 2010 at 8:44 am
This...was beautiful.  Haunting, beautiful, and sad.  The writing style is very unique and fresh, not one I"m used to.  This was a very powerful piece, I could really feel the emotion.   The only thing I could say was it was a tiny bit hard to follow.  The ending was amazing.  I"m sorry you had to go through this.
CallMeFelix replied...
Aug. 31, 2010 at 11:57 am
Thanks =) The feedback is greatly appreciated. Sorry it was a bit hard to follow =) It was a stream-of-consciousness piece, so that's probably why. Thanks again!
Annalibelle said...
Aug. 30, 2010 at 9:04 pm

Hi, it’s Annali from Actually Helpful Critique.

(I realize that this is a true story, and I extend my love to you, but I’m going to basically critique your writing as if this were any other kind of piece.)

The quote at the beginning is a great way to make a reader curious. Just a nitpick, but it might sound better phrased Switchfoot once said, “Hold fast to the break of daylight, the shadow proves the sunshine” or  “Hold fast to the b... (more »)

CallMeFelix replied...
Aug. 30, 2010 at 9:54 pm

It's not lame =) It's completely understandable. Thanks for the critique, as well, and I'm sorry I almost made you cry. I'm glad I managed to pull off the stream of consciousness without it sounding too weird, and as for the motifs, I didn't even notice them until I was done and simply let them be mostly how they were, so I can definitely understand them not tying together.

Thanks again for the honest feedback =) It's greatly appreciated!

A.Anonymous said...
Aug. 30, 2010 at 10:25 am

wow i really like your writing :) 

could you please comment/rate my work i only have on article up - any suggestions lemme know :) 

thanks, and great job! 

CallMeFelix replied...
Aug. 30, 2010 at 3:36 pm
Thanks =) I'll be sure to check out your work when I get the chance!
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