July 3, 2010
By , Albuquerque, NM
I’m writing again . Finally . Its been a long time since i put a pen to paper and made some magic . Wondering what i’m writing about ? Major Depressive Disorder . Your also probably wondering wtf it is . Well , major means great or serious . Depressive means tending to depress and disorder can mean a disturbance in mental health . So if you put that all together it means when you suffer from a disturbance in your mental health which causes you to be depressed . Yeah , I have it .

I guess i’m writing about this because this something i know a lot about . This all revolves around the things that happened on February 25th , 2010 . If you were there , you probably saw it . If you listened , you probably heard it from someone . Or this could be your first time ever hearing about it . I tried to kill myself . And i got sent to the hospital . I guess i’m fine now , but i still have the disorder , and i think about suicide everyday . It’s just there 24/7 . I see it happening in my sleep . I think about it when i clean , when i shower , when i watch tv . My mind is wrapped around it . And no amount of medicine will make me not think about it . Not any of those damn happy pills .

I really hope , I make this into something . A book , perhaps a short story . I really don’t know . But umm , yeeah . I’m happy that the pen and paper are about to make a baby though . And who knows when the baby will be due , but it’s gonna be a good birth . I guarantee it :)

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Bethani said...
Apr. 29, 2011 at 8:45 pm
You're very brave. I'm sorry for your pain. 
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