The bass beats the walls. It’s a slow but steady beat. Intwined together as we move across the marble floor. Your beautiful brown eyes glisten in the low light. I look into your eyes trying to pass the barriers that lead to your heart. No one by Alicia Keys floods our ears. People around us trying to dance to an upbeat song that seems to be playing in their heads. There are other slow dancers sweeping across the floor. They seem… happy. I feel happy. For the first time in a long time. I am completley thoughtless of why I have to wear a long dress or how I have no shoes on. He looks to the side and leaves. I am stuck in this room full of unknown people. The room has expanded to where the exit seems miles away. My eyes sting like a bee. The ice that flows through my veins as the bumps on my skin begin to rise. I run in circles no where to go. The side door is right behind me, I just happen to stumble out of it. I run, I run as far away as I possibly can. I trip into the football field. I just sit there and cry. The tears flow over, feeling as if they will never stop. Bruised and beaten. The waves are flooding the shore tearing me down with water. Dragging me farther and farther into the depths of the ocean drowning me. Swallowing me whole. I plead and reach for your hand at the top of the water, but everytime I get close you jerk it out of the water. My heart feels as if a poisoned dagger has just been jabbed and twisted into my heart a million times. Just as the old ones started to heal. I sit on the field hoping you will walk out that door and run to me like you always have. You do walk out those doors. I have a sensation of hope. Then I see her walk out behind you. I see you kiss her. She smiles but you don’t. It means absolutley nothing to you yet it means the world to her. Just like you mean’t the world to me. You did, until you left me in this puddle of tears. The tears that drench my dress, streak my make-up, and the ones that tear me apart. Torn apart until you can’t be torn or stretched anymore. You were my new beginning.
Kiss Me When I'm Down
April 10, 2010